She was in and out of clarity across the three days I was there.Not in the frightening way of illness, not the disorientation of a mind losing its grip on what was real. More like a tide. She would be fully present, entirely herself, the eyes sharp and the voice carrying its characteristic precision, and then the clarity would recede for a time and she would be somewhere else, somewhere quieter, somewhere between the present and all the accumulated past of ninety-three years. And then it would return, and she would pick up exactly where she had left off as if the interval had not happened.Berra managed the rhythm of it without appearing to manage it, the long practice of someone who had been attending to this woman for decades and understood her completely.I let myself be guided by Berra's sense of when Elara was available and when she was not, because Berra's sense was more accurate than my wanting.In the clear moments, Elara talked.Not the ordered accounts she had given me in t
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