KAI A FEW HOURS LATER *** "I still don't know how to be a father," I said, setting the half-finished cradle against the wall with more force than I intended. The wood smelled like fresh oil and hope, but my hands were shaking. "I know how to fight. I know how to run. I don't know how to hold something that small without breaking it." Lila sat on the edge of the bed, one hand under her heavy stomach, the other reaching for me, though I didn't take it right away. "We just have to try. Same as everything else. You're already here. That's more than a lot of men can manage." "Is it enough, though?" I asked. I sat beside her anyway. "I keep thinking about Mara, the one I lost. I couldn't save her, Lila. What if I fail this child the same way?" "You will not." Lila's voice cracked, firm even while her body sagged with exhaustion. She grabbed my jaw and forced me to look at her. "You are not the same man. I am not her. This child is already fighting to get here, and you will not poison
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