Semua Bab She Needed Him. I Needed a Divorce: Bab 1 - Bab 10

I checked myself out of the hospital the next morning.At home, the broken vase was still scattered beside the coffee table.I crouched down and picked up the pieces one at a time. My lower abdomen ached, forcing me to move slowly.With the last shard in my hand, I stopped.This was where I had collapsed the night before, frightened I might not wake up.And I was still the one cleaning up afterward.The lock clicked.Luca came in wearing yesterday's shirt, shadows beneath his eyes.I glanced up at him.“Bianca's appointment ran late,” he said, setting down his keys. “I got her settled, then slept at the office for a few hours.”I nodded. I didn't ask him anything.Luca looked at the garbage bag in my hand.“What actually happened last night?”During our first year of marriage, I'd once woken with a fever and found Luca sitting beside me. He'd held the glass while I drank because my hands were shaking.“Wake me next time,” he'd said. “You don't have to get through it alone.”Last night,

Over the next three days, Luca began to notice something was different.I used to get up half an hour before him so breakfast would be ready when he left at eight.At noon, I'd ask whether he'd eaten.If he wasn't home by eleven, there would be at least two messages from me on his phone.Now I did none of it.On the fourth evening, he came home before eight for the first time in months.He looked straight at me, seated at the desk with a stack of contracts for my design studio.“Is your phone broken?”“No.”I didn't look up.“Then why haven't you texted me all day?”My pen paused.“You've muted my messages. Does it make a difference whether I send them?”He went still.“I mute notifications so I can work without being interrupted. It isn't an excuse to take shots at me.”“I'm not.”I returned to the contract.“I just think you were right. Adults have lives of their own. We don't need to organize everything around each other.”For once, Luca had no immediate answer.A few seconds later,

After the courier left, I stood in the living room for a long time.I'd lived here for three years.I'd chosen the cabinet by the door. Visited four stores before buying the sofa. Nursed the half-dead fiddle-leaf fig on the balcony back to life.When we first married, Luca was always busy.I had made the apartment a home by myself, telling myself that once things settled down, we'd have time to grow into it together.Eventually, I understood that busy was his normal.Waiting had become mine.For three years, I knew every appointment in his schedule and exactly how he took his coffee.Somewhere along the way, I'd stopped knowing what I liked.The two mugs I'd bought were still beside the dining table.In the early days, he sometimes got up in time to eat breakfast with me. Once, I laughed because his tie was crooked. He complained that I fussed too much, but bent his head so I could straighten it.It was little things like that that kept convincing me he cared.And every time he disappo

I moved into a small apartment near the studio.One bedroom, one living room. Not enough space for a proper dining table. Plain cream curtains.But when I put my own mug in the cabinet, I felt something I hadn't felt in years.I was starting a life that belonged to me.That first night, I lay in bed and felt unexpectedly light.No lamp to leave on.No guessing when someone else would come home.No message worth staring at a screen for hours.The next morning, I went back to the studio.The familiar smell of materials greeted me as I opened the door.After the wedding, I'd put most of my energy into our home. I'd kept a handful of design jobs and a few long-term clients, leaving my business partner, Nora, to carry more than her share.She stared when she saw me.“Look who finally remembered she owns half this place.”I smiled.“Get used to seeing me.”She didn't ask what had happened. She pushed a stack of samples across the table instead.“Good. The new collection needs a lead designer

There was still a wait while the attorneys filed the papers and the court processed everything.During the month that followed, Luca didn't come looking for me.Occasionally, he asked how I was feeling. If I didn't answer, he left it there instead of sending more messages.The care I'd wanted for years had finally appeared, after I'd decided to leave.By the time the divorce was finalized, rain was falling outside Claire's office.We sat across a table to collect the court's judgment and sign the final acknowledgments our attorneys needed.When Claire handed me my copy, I thought about our wedding three years earlier.I'd smiled all the way to the parking lot, clutching the marriage certificate. Luca had called me ridiculous, then lifted a hand to shield my face from the sun.The same man. Another set of papers.Neither of us smiled this time.I put the judgment in my bag.There wasn't the rush of relief I'd expected. There wasn't even much sadness.Only the feeling that something long