Funny Gravity Falls Quotes

For as long as I can remember, my family and I have been living in an underground basement that's completely shut off from the outside world. My parents have told me that the zombie apocalypse is terrorizing the outside world. The air is completely plagued with the zombie virus, and we'll die if we ever leave the basement. In order to save the supplies—which are already dwindling, to begin with—I've starved myself to the point I'm all skin and bones despite being only 18 years old. When I realize that there's only one last can of food left, I leave behind a suicide note. "Mom, Dad, now there's one less mouth to feed. You'll last a few more days." After that, I slit my wrist right away. Once I'm dead, my soul phases through the thick and heavy metal door. Bright sunlight illuminates the entire world. It's a beautiful, peaceful world filled with greenery. I can even hear birds chirping in the distance. Mom, Dad, and a bunch of people are throwing a barbecue party on the lawn. The mouth-watering smell of food being grilled permeates the air. So, it turns out that the zombie apocalypse is just a lie that's designated to trap me inside the fortress. I'm the only one who has died in this sunny, peaceful world.

As the son of Lucifer and Lilith, Fallon was cursed to live without a soul. Knowing that happiness was not for him; he was content with helping the weak. Bree is just a normal girl, living in a normal world. She never expected that there was anything beyond her human existence. That is until a tall, dark, supernatural male walks into her life and reveals that she’s the key to ending the world. What's a girl to do when the fate of the world is in her hands? What's a cursed male to do when his mission is to protect the most tempting woman in the world?

Summer Haynes, a.k.a 'Ms. Clumsy'. A lazy Tomboy trying to get her crush's attention with the help from her former ex bully. This is not the best idea to start with...

A particularly dark tale. Not for the faint of heart. He was the all-powerful Magistrate Mathis. The man that accused the witches and then found them guilty in the dungeons of WitchFall Fortress. I had feared ever being one of them, but not enough to be dissuaded from figuring out why he didn't seem to be what he was. So I followed him into the woods one day and discovered the one secret he was willing to wreak havoc to keep. The secret he'd make me pay for ever knowing. And if he couldn't have me on my terms, well he was certainly powerful enough to find a way, wasn't he? The most horrible kind of way... Barely understanding what was happening, I soon found myself in the worst place I could possibly be. Under his complete control...

My little sister Willa? Always played the noble princess—even during the freaking apocalypse. She was pregnant and still trying to look like some graceful queen. I told her to end it. Safer that way. She slapped me. "Shut up. How can you be so heartless?" Meanwhile, I skipped meals so she and her rescue-pet gang could eat. When I collapsed from hunger, she snorted. "Drama queen. Think of it as a free weight-loss plan." I dragged her to the base, the safe zone, and nearly died doing it. She snatched the last of my rations. "The baby and I are good. Give the rest away." I died from my injuries—frozen, starving, forgotten. Willa? She got crowned a saint. Even landed the baby daddy—the Deputy Governor—and kicked off her perfect little fairytale. Then I woke up. Back to the moment she asked me to swear I'd protect her and the baby. This time, I laughed in her face. "Die for all I care."

My deskmate, Miranda Krause, has made a pact with the grade-swapping system. Because of that, she's able to swap her empty exam papers with my stellar ones. That's how Miranda ends up becoming the top scorer on the SATs. I, on the other hand, have flunked the exam, making me the laughingstock of the city. Unable to endure the suffering any longer, I choose to take my life by jumping off the school building. Little do I know that I'll return to the timeframe before the SATs take place. This time, I secretly slip an envelope between the folds of Miranda's backpack. It contains 700 dollars in cash as well as a talisman. The scribbles on the talisman may seem like chicken scratch, but one can vaguely make out the words "score-swapping" there.