If I Ever Get Out Of Here

The world ended but escaping him was always the harder part. Alone in a dying world filled with abandoned villages, hidden secrets, and creatures lurking in the dark, she fights to survive while running from the man who once destroyed her life. But the deeper she goes, the more she uncovers a terrifying truth connecting her, the village she escaped, and the thing hunting her through the ruins of the world. Some monsters are born after the apocalypse. Others were always human.

My husband tells me he's a wanted fugitive. He doesn't want to drag me down with him, so he turns himself in and tells me to marry another. My heart aches for him. I scrimp and save to raise our son while waiting for him to be released from prison. It's only when my hair has gone gray that I learn the truth—I see him holding his true love's hand as they go shopping. They buy luxury products like they cost nothing. Only then do I understand that he pretended to be thrown behind bars to be rid of me and our son. When I open my eyes again, I'm taken back to the day my husband pretended to be a fugitive. I immediately call the police and give them the evidence of his crimes. He likes acting like a fugitive, doesn't he? He can spend the rest of his life behind bars, then.

This isn't a love story, but almost a love story. Irina and Eric share a world through dreams and time travel. They have a strong mutual understanding about the feelings they have for each other, at the same time understanding that they cannot be together. Eric: I open my eyes and find myself standing alone in an empty room. The ceilings and the walls are neatly painted white. And the floor is composed of polished light brown wood. And there is a dark brown framed window at one corner where the light comes from. A bright yellow and pale red orange light tells me the sun is setting and soon it will be dark. Eric is a ghost who always appears in Irina's dream. Irina: I open the door to the bedroom. There is a dark brown framed window at one corner where the light is coming from. The yellow orange light passes through the open window. I see Eric standing right there on the spot captured by the yellow light. ‘You came back.’ I said. He stood there looking me in the eye. I almost died. Irina is a time traveler who may or may not change his fate. They alternatively tell a bitter sweet story. Love doesn't always mean together, sometimes it is deeper apart. Eric: I stand alone in the rain looking at the dark sky where all I can see is water, for it is both the rain and my tears flowing to my face. Irina: And suddenly it is no longer my reflection I see inside the mirror. What I see now is a figure of a man. I draw closer to see him clearly. But the closer I walk towards him, the farther I become from him. I couldn't get close.

After eight years of marriage, I finally get pregnant with Claude Frey's child. It's my sixth round of IVF, and my last chance. The doctor says I can't put my body through it again. I'm overjoyed, ready to share the good news with him. But a week before our anniversary, I received an anonymous photo in the mail. In it, he was bending down to kiss another woman's pregnant belly. That woman is his childhood sweetheart, the one his family watched grow up. She's gentle and well-mannered, and the kind of daughter-in-law every parent dreams of. The funniest part is that his entire family knows about her pregnancy, except me. I'm just the punchline in their joke. It turns out that the marriage I've been holding together despite all my wounds is nothing but a carefully crafted lie. Fine. I don't want Claude anymore, and I'll never let my child be born into a world built on lies. I book my ticket to leave on our eighth anniversary. It's also the very day he's supposed to take me to see the sea of roses. Before we got married, he promised me a sea of flowers all my own. But instead, I find him in front of the rose garden, kissing his pregnant childhood sweetheart. After I leave, he starts searching for me everywhere. "Don't go, please?" he begs. "I was wrong. Don't leave." He finally remembers the promise he'd made to me and plants the most beautiful roses in the world in that garden. But I don't need it anymore.

On the day I was supposed to get engaged to my childhood sweetheart, Noah Pratt, I escaped. As I flew out of the country, I deleted all forms of contact with him. Six years later, I had to return to oversee the moving of my parents’ graves. At the entrance to the cemetery, I bumped right into Noah. He gripped my wrist while gazing at me with red-rimmed eyes. “Why did you run away?” he asked. He had grown very thin. Heavy bags were under his eyes. It was as if haunting dreams had plagued his nights. “Because I didn’t want to marry someone I didn’t love,” I replied. He swayed on his feet as if the rug had been swept from under him. “Is there anything else?” I asked. But he remained silent. I waited patiently before walking past him. I had not lied. Indeed, I had burned out that love for him in the first three years I spent overseas.

I spent years trying to be the perfect wife. I swallowed the insults. Excused the betrayal. Gave up my dreams because I was told they didn't matter. Convinced myself that I was the problem. Then one day, something inside me broke. I thought leaving would end my misery. Instead, it dragged me into a mess I never saw coming. The husband who never appreciated me suddenly refuses to let me go. The man who should have been nothing more than a stranger keeps finding his way into my life, looking at me like I’m the one thing he is determined to have. One is desperate to reclaim what he lost. The other wants me for all the wrong reasons. But after years of living for everyone else, I've made one promise to myself: I will never lose who I am for love again. And if they want a war? They'll have to fight it without me.