Funny Sex Jokes Novels & Stories

Blurb: Trigger Warnings: This novel has explicit gay sex, lesbian sex, BDSM using whips, chains, and domination, trans characters fucking, and fucking with paranormal creatures such as vampires blowing and werewolves knotting in asses. This is a collection of dirty sex tales. Cocks harden and pussies get wet. Tops pin bottoms and fuck them hard. Mistresses in leather whip bodies with whips until they beg to cum. Gay dudes lick asses in the locker room. Lesbians play with pussies against each other and use strap-ons until they come. Trans people use toys and tongues on all their holes. No limits—straight-up smut to make you hot. Author's Note: For those who can't jerk off to porno but need books to imagine the sex scenes in order properly—use these stories for your dirtiest thinking. Not for those under 18.

They all said, sex sells. Yes, it's true, especially for Val. He's a guy willing to meet any woman to share a bed with him. He's a sex addict and he called it his dirty pleasures. Mature Content!

Amy is a twenty three year-old girl who has everything in her life planned. She is focused on her work and achieving great things in her life. When she meets Jace, a hot and funny wolf, everything in her world is turned upside down. Jace tries to avoid her but he can't seem to stay away from her. She is fated for him. She is his awakening force...

Rosalie sister Rebecca is getting married and her fiancé Ben comes from a very wealthy family. His brother Julius is a billionaire bad boy and his best man. When he meets the maid of honor (Rosalie) sparks fly. Her quick wit, raw talent for the cello, and captivating beauty leaves him wanting to leave his rambling ways behind forever but she wants no part in being with a play boy. She isn’t impressed with fame and fortune and she’s nothing like the women he’s use to. Planning the wedding of the century and celebrating each moment leaves Rosalie and Julius falling into each others arms-but can he keep her there? This romantic comedy will leave your heart racing with wild passion and laughing along the way.

In a world where the gods of legend have become actual fact, a few misnomers from another planet seek to simply live their lives in peace. If you could choose one word from the dictionary, one that simply defines you to the core of your soul, what would you say your definition is?

Suzanne O'Izzy is a klutzy kind of girl who always wanted to be a hero. Due to the fact that the city she lived in, Herotapolis, had an organization named Hero league that trained heroes, her dream could easily be fulfilled. But when the time for her to take the entrance exam came, Hero league were in battle with villains known as the rogue heroes hence her and the other students in her school who applied were given scholarships to train at Superhero high.Suzanne gets recruited in Squad 10 and finds out that before she can save the world doing heroic deeds she must first be skillful at things and get along with her teammates. It really didn't help matters when the three boys also assigned as her teammates never saw eye to eye on things.Plus E-rank exam was nearing. They had to learn how to get along to move a step up in the hero world. Amidst all quarrels and difficulties, Squad 10 managed to scrape through and enter E-ranks, finally they could start going on missions.Another teammate, a medical corp, was assigned to them. Every Squad in E-rank had one.It was then Suzanne knew her hero life had just begun.

"Cali, drop the knife, you know it is never that hard that you have to kill yourself." "For the last time Blake. I'm not suicidal!!" I throw the knife away. "Then why were you holding that knife?" He asked, worried. I then showed him the apple in my other hand. ------------- Cali Evans, 17, a normal girl with a wacky attitude and sass. Life was going smooth for her until Blake happened. Blake Sanders, 18, the popular, hot, bad boy finds a new mission when he meets Cali. One misunderstanding, a sarcastic girl and a bad boy equals to food fights, bowling nights, dangerous knifes, terrace conversations, monopoly games and maybe some love.

After working different jobs to pay off her debts and take care of her younger sister,she finally got a job as a personal maid for the most powerful business man,Ryan Damon, in the biggest mansion in the city. With their different personalities, she being a soft-hearted kind woman but stubborn in every way and the young master being a brutal and cold-hearted person,they found their alluring desires for each other a bit too cynical. But after working for him for almost a year she found out about a dark secret he kept from her, about her and her past. Can she let go of that burning desire for him? Or will she take revenge and make him pay?

[The ML and the FL have no blood relationship.] After Nora and Ethan have a one-night stand, Ethan finds Nora is his mate; they also find they have a blood relationship with each other. Ethan is Nora's uncle; they haven't met each other for many years so neither of them knows what another looks like. Thinking this is a wrong arrangement from the Moon Goddess, Ethan hides his scent from Nora, therefore Nora thinks she does not have a mate when she becomes 18. They try their best not to let others know they have made love before... Many years later, they encounter in Nora's Luna ceremony. She is going to be another man's wife!

Mathematically put; 2blahdity - 6bluffity + 5whoopsie - 8oopsdaisy + Nerdiness.The Variable Life of Sam: where N(Nerdiness) is a constant.Has it crossed your mind to wonder how the first-all-Nigerian-schools excursion would be?Wonder no more as Sam takes us "out on dinner" with his "out of this world" narrative, weaving up his "breathtaking" adventures, with students from different schools. Hilarious moments, invented imaginations, teenage crush, life as a nerd, "The Battle of Wits: War Against Bullies"...Join this adventurous train on the railway of humour as Sam, the locomotive driver of the train takes us yonder.....