what we shouldn't be
Dan is a rising basketball star with everything going in his favor. A future at NYU, a spot on the Boston team, his life seemed pretty perfect. But behind his success is a truth he can never seem to escape.
Kenz has always been more than just family to Dan, as friends, cousins and also emotional supporters. Kenz is the only one who understands him in ways no one else knew or cared to know about. But with time, their bond shifted into something deeper, something they both knew wasn't right.
As Dan leaves for Boston to chase his basketball dreams, distance begins to affect the relationship they had. Kenz on the other hand, tries focusing on his relationship with Fiona and living a normal life, but he is unable to do that because he feels incomplete without Dan. The closer Dan gets to success, the more complicated their connection becomes.
What started as hidden feelings slowly turns into confusion, guilt and resentment. Both boys struggle between choosing love and living a normal life.
In a world filled with confrontations and pressure, Dan and Kenz are forced to accept the truth they have spent so long avoiding. Feelings are never easy to get rid of.
And sometimes choosing love may end up destroying everything around them.
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Chapter: CRACKS YOU CANT SEECHAPTER FORTY THREEKENZ’S POVI hadn’t planned on coming over.At least…That’s what I kept telling myself.Truth was, I’d been thinking about home all day.About the living room.About Mrs. Alexis asking if I’d eaten before I even took my shoes off.About Dan yelling at me for stealing another one of his hoodies.Funny.I still called it home even though I barely stayed there anymore.My classes ended earlier than usual, and before I knew it, I was already on a bus heading there with a bag of takeout resting on my thighs.Maybe things didn’t have to stay awkward forever.Maybe Dan and I could slowly find our way back to each other.Maybe.Maybe I was getting my hopes up.The familiar house came into view.Nothing had changed.The flowers by the porch were still there.Dan’s car still sat near the garage.Everything looked exactly the same.So why did it suddenly feel like I was visiting instead of coming home?I grabbed the bag of food and rang the doorbell.A few seconds later, the
Last Updated: 2026-07-14
Chapter: THE THINGS I CAN'T FIXCHAPTER FOURTY TWO DAN'S POV The door clicked shut behind me. I did not lock it. I just stood there with one hand still on the doorknob trying to catch my breath. My chest felt really tight. The kind of tight that made it hard to think straight. "What the fuck," I whispered to myself. I let go of the handle and stepped back until the backs of my knees bumped into the edge of the bed. I sat down quick before my legs decided to give out completely. The room stayed dark except for the streetlight coming through the blinds. I did not even bother turning on the light. I did not feel like I deserved it anyway. I buried my face in my hands. What the hell was that downstairs? No. I knew exactly what it was. It just was not what it looked like from the outside. Toria had not done anything wrong. She saw me falling apart and tried to help. She got me some water. She listened and did not push for details. She put her hand on my arm. That was it. That should have been all of it. So wh
Last Updated: 2026-07-13
Chapter: THE THINNING LINECHAPTER FORTY ONETORIA’S POVI spent the entire day pretending last night never happened.It was easier said than done.Every time I walked into the kitchen, I remembered how close he’d been.Every time I looked toward the staircase, I remembered the way he’d stepped back like he’d just woken up from a nightmare.Nothing had happened.Not really.So why couldn’t I stop thinking about it?I sighed and tossed another shirt into the laundry basket.“Get over yourself, Toria.”The house was quiet again.Kenz had classes.Dan had practice.Just me…And my own stupid thoughts.I turned the TV on, hoping the noise would drown them out.It didn’t.Instead, I found myself replaying every second from yesterday.The look on Dan’s face.How exhausted he looked.How defeated.He hadn’t looked at me like a man looking at a woman.He’d looked at me like someone who’d been carrying too much for too long.Maybe that was why I reached for his arm.Maybe…Or maybe I was lying to myself.A car door slam
Last Updated: 2026-07-12
Chapter: DROWNING OUT THE SILENCEDAN’S POVI closed the bedroom door behind me and stood there for a second.The house felt empty again.Way too empty.I rubbed a hand over my face and let out a slow breath before dropping my bag beside the desk.“Idiot,” I muttered under my breath before I could stop myself.I pulled my hoodie off and tossed it onto the chair before heading straight for the bathroom. I turned the tap as cold as it would go and splashed water across my face.Once.Twice.Three times.When I finally looked up, my reflection looked just as exhausted as I felt.“What the hell were you thinking?” I asked quietly.My reflection didn’t have an answer either.I grabbed the towel beside the sink and dried my face before walking back into the room.The bed looked inviting, but I wasn’t tired enough to sleep.Not with everything running through my head.I sat on the edge of the mattress, resting my elbows on my knees.The second I closed my eyes…I saw it again.Toria standing in front of me.Her hand resting
Last Updated: 2026-07-11
Chapter: THE LINE WE NEVER CROSSEDCHAPTER THIRTY NINE TORIA’S POV The house felt too quiet. Not peaceful. Just… awkward. The kind of silence that settles over a place after something happens, even if nobody wants to talk about it. I sat cross-legged on the couch with my laptop balanced on my thighs, pretending to work on an assignment that hadn’t moved past the first paragraph in almost an hour. The TV played quietly in the background. I wasn’t even watching it. Every few minutes, I found myself looking at the front door. Dan should’ve been home by now. Practice usually ended around five, and unless Coach had decided to torture the team again, he was never this late. I glanced at my phone. 8:46 p.m. Still nothing. I sighed and shut my laptop. “Yeah… this assignment wasn’t getting done today.” I laughed quietly to myself. I got up and wandered into the kitchen. The fridge was almost empty except for leftover pasta, juice, and a carton of milk that had probably expired two days ago.
Last Updated: 2026-07-10
Chapter: THE SPACE BETWEEN USKENZ'S POVI must've opened Dan's message at least twenty times.Can we talk?Three words.That was all it took to make my stomach twist itself into knots.I kept staring at them, hoping they'd somehow become less terrifying the longer I looked. They didn't. If anything, they only got worse.My thumb hovered over the keyboard.Yeah.Delete.Sure.Delete.Where?I stared at the blinking cursor for another few seconds before finally forcing myself to type.Okay. Where do you want to meet?I hit send before I could change my mind.Almost immediately, the typing bubble appeared.The old basketball court.Of course.For a second, I just sat there on the edge of my bed, phone still clutched in my hand as my heart pounded against my ribs.The old court.The same place we'd spent countless evenings shooting hoops just because neither of us wanted to go back inside yet.The same place where we'd laughed until our stomachs hurt over the dumbest things.The same place where we'd once promised ea
Last Updated: 2026-07-09
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