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Chapter 2

The clock on my nightstand shows that it’s already 4:43 PM and I need to leave soon if I don’t want to be late.  Brent will be meeting me at Grand Teton National Park which is about a 40-minute drive from my house.

We wanted to meet somewhere beautiful so that when we see each other, and the mate bond snaps into place we have a beautiful setting to add to the memory and the stories we’ll tell our children and grandchildren.

After one more quick glance in the mirror to confirm that I look okay. I slip on my brown ballet flats grab my purse and keys and head out the door.  I opted for the flats instead of heels because I need to be able to easily walk the trails in the park to get to the spot where we agreed to meet.

It’s getting warm out and the mountain breeze feels so good, but today I’m driving with the windows up and the A/C running on a low setting.  I don’t want to risk messing up my hair.  Everything about this moment needs to be perfect.

Admittedly, I tend to speed when I drive, so I ended up getting there about 10 minutes early.  At least I can take my time on the trail and make sure I’m not too tired, or worse – sweaty, when I arrive.

I’ve always loved these mountains.  The jutting peaks surrounded by acres of gorgeous aspen forest and gleaming lakes next to wildflower meadows just speaks to my soul.  Of course, as wolves we love being in nature, but this park holds special memories for me.

Before my mom was killed in a rogue attack we used to come here together as a family every weekend in the summer.  Hiking, camping, and having picnics were just a few of the activities we enjoyed.

After my mom died, my dad shut down.  Whenever I asked him if he wanted to come here, he declined.  It had been years since I'd been able to visit, but as soon as I got my driver’s license, I started making my own trips up here alone. Eventuallly, I started bringing Brent along as well.  I told Brent that I wanted to have our moment here because it would help me to feel like my mom was here celebrating with us.

We made several trips here together over the last couple of months to scout out the perfect location for this moment.  There are a lot of tourists in the area and so it can be challenging to find privacy, but we lucked out and stumbled upon a mountain stream that flows into a small clearing sprinkled with Monkshood, Fireweed, and Skyrocket Gilia flowers.

Rounding a large boulder, the meadow came into view, and I could already smell the flowers as my ears tuned in to listen to the magical sound of the babbling brook.  This moment already felt perfect, and my mate wasn’t even here yet.

There was a large tree on the far side of the clearing and under it sat two large flat stones, smooth and perfect to sit and rest.  I made my way across the meadow and picked a Skyrocket as I passed.  Tipping the flower at my lips, the sweet nectar inside slipped into my mouth and danced over my tongue as I swallowed it.  Natures perfect sweet treat.

Settling down on the rock to wait for Brent, the weight of this moment finally hits me.  I’m about to find out if Brent is my fated mate, and either way we are going to declare our love for one another and commit to be mates for life.  I’m so sure of this, so sure of us, that all I feel is peace and joy.

The front edge of the rock is currently bathed in sunlight, and I decide to scoot forward and soak it in.  I close my eyes and tilt my head back to welcome the warmth of the sun when I hear Brent’s voice across the field. “Hey there beautiful!  Mind if I join you?”

Butterflies erupt in my stomach at the sound of his voice.  Momentarily, I panic because I didn’t smell anything, but I remind myself that since we’re outside we may have to be closer to smell each other’s mate scent. Neither of us have experienced the mate bond before, so we don’t know what to expect.  Yeah, we’ve heard from others what it’s like, but knowing something and experiencing it for yourself are two very different things.

I quickly stand and begin making my way back across the meadow.  As we move closer to each other, everything feels like it’s in slow motion.  I begin intentionally sniffing the air and I almost close my eyes to focus on his scent.

In a matter of seconds, we’re standing in front of each other, both wearing expressions of shock and confusion.  Brent takes me in his arms and buries his face in my neck inhaling deeply.  Wait, maybe he can smell it… but I don’t smell anything.  What’s wrong with me?

Almost in answer to my question, Brent pulls back, and his eyes look sad.  “You smell the same.”

I swallow the lump in my throat, but I can’t speak, so I just nod my head to confirm.  We’re not fated mates.

Brent grabs my hand with one of his, and his other hand moves up to cup my cheek.  “It’s ok, Gina.  We can still choose each other...  I choose you.”

I smile at him, but it doesn’t reach my eyes.  I was so sure that we were mates.  We both were.  Even though we agreed to choose each other, knowing that we aren’t fated, this moment feels.. anticlimactic.

Every wolf hopes to find their fated mate.  The mate bond is always described as the most intense feelings you will ever have towards another person.  Brent and I wanted to be together no matter what, and we hoped we would get to experience the mate bond together, but we’re already in love.  Mate bond be damned, I’m not giving him up.

Pushing my disappointment aside, I swallow again and force a smile that is more convincing.  “Yeah,” I croak, “I choose you too.”

-----

We tried to hang out and talk in the meadow, but things just felt awkward despite our best efforts, so we headed out early to get to dinner.  Dinner was not the joyous moment we both anticipated, and we agreed that we were probably both tired because we didn’t sleep much the night before due to our excitement.

Instead of setting up our tent to camp under the stars, we agreed to both go home and rest, and then we could give ourselves time to adjust to the idea that we would only be chosen mates, not fated.

Before we parted ways, Brent held me tight and kissed me passionately.  It was reassuring, but there was still a heaviness in my heart.  How could he not be fated to me?

-----

Now I’m sitting at home alone in the dark living room.  A few silent tears streak down my face, but I refuse to act like this is terrible thing.  Brent is still mine.  We still chose each other.

I’m thankful my dad isn’t home.  Not that he would ask or say anything.  He never pays attention to me.  I just appreciate having the house to myself.  The dark and the quiet helps me to clear my head and process everything that happened today.

The sound of Dad’s truck pulling up makes me realize that I spoke too soon.  It’s only 11:20 PM.  He’s usually not home until 12:30 AM at the earliest.  I hear his voice murmuring something and the voice of a woman giggling.  They’re both obviously drunk and, thanks to my heightened were wolf senses, I can smell the alcohol from inside the house.  Quickly rising to my feet, I rush upstairs and into my room, closing the door behind me.

I sit on my bed in the dark as I listen to my dad and his date for the night, stumbling through the house toward his bedroom.  At least they closed the door.  That will help suppress the sounds of their late-night tryst.  Dad seems to like the loud ones, and before I can give it much thought, I can hear her moaning loudly from the room down the hall.

Looks like I’ll need my noise canceling headphones tonight.  I put them on and lay in bed listening to “Wish You Were Here” by Incubus as a few more silent tears fall down my cheeks.  Another reminder that I’m not with my mate tonight.

-----

Another week passes in the blink of an eye, and it’s finally Friday again.  This means it’s been almost a week since Brent and I discovered that we aren’t fated mates.  Word gets around fast, so everyone at school has heard the news and keeps asking us if we’re going to break up now.  We have made it abundantly clear to everyone that we still plan to choose and mark each other after graduation.  Everyone, that is, except our parents.  Well, HIS parents.

My dad doesn’t really know anything about what’s going on and he doesn’t care anyway.  He’s not at all involved in my life.  He’s met Brent a handful of times, but never really seemed to care to get to know him.  Brent’s parents are our biggest obstacle.  They have always liked me and been very kind, but they have also never shied away from the fact that they believe a fated mate is the most important gift the moon goddess can bestow upon us.  We both know that they will not be happy about our choice to stay together and reject our fated mates if we meet them.

Honestly, things were a little awkward between Brent and I for a few days after realizing that we weren’t fated, but now things are back to normal, and we couldn’t be happier.  I was a bit worried thinking that he might actually choose to break up with me because of how he was raised, to honor the mate bond, but he has been so affectionate and attentive for the last 3 days, after he got over the shock of it all.  Maybe even more affectionate than he was before.  I think we both just needed some time to adjust our mindset.

The thing with being in school still is that everyone else in our grade is around the same age as us, which means there are a lot of wolves having birthdays, turning 18, and looking for their mates.  Many of the kids in our class choose to throw big parties and invite everyone hoping that their mate shows up.  Several girls have attempted to flirt with Brent, inviting him to their upcoming birthday parties, but of course, he turns them down.

Jill’s party is in about a week and a half, but today everyone is buzzing about Amanda’s party which is tonight.  When I say they invite everyone, I mean everyone!  Amanda invited Jill, and she even had the nerve to invite me and Brent!  Of course, none of us are going to attend.  Jill isn’t old enough to find her mate yet, so there’s really no point in her going, and since Brent and I have already chosen each other, we have no intention of going, but I think Amanda has always had a crush on Brent and she was hoping they were fated so she could steal him from me.

I guess we could go and if we find our mates there it would give us the opportunity to reject them so that we could move forward with our relationship, but we don’t really want to humiliate them at a party in front of everyone.  No, we’ll just wait and deal with them if and when we come across them.

For years, I had been trying to convince Jill to go out on a double date with Brent and I, but she has always insisted that she was saving herself for her mate.  She never dated anyone, and honestly, I don’t even think she has ever kissed a guy, which is surprising with all the partying she’s done, I guess her mind is set.  Even though she is saving herself for her mate, she also doesn’t judge me for being with Brent and choosing him over my mate.  She’s a good friend and she supports me and my choices even if she disagrees.

-----

Over the next several weeks, many of our classmates found their fated mates.  Every time I’d be walking through the hall, and I heard someone say “mate,” my head snapped around to see who it was and who they were talking to.  There was a part of me that was always worried that one time it would be my mate or Brent’s, but it never was.

Jill’s birthday came and went, and she didn’t find her mate either.  She was pretty heartbroken at first, but I reminded her that she’s never really left the territory and her mate was probably not from our pack.

Now that she is 18, she can attend the Blue Moon Ball where wolves from many different packs gather in search of their mates.  She loves getting all dressed up for a night out, and the next ball is taking place right after graduation.  She immediately started searching for the perfect dress and dreaming about that magical moment when she meets her mate at the ball.  I pray that it works out and she isn’t left heartbroken again.

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