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[Nightmare]

SIERRA

<<January 17th, 2017>>

Images replayed in my mind on repeat. Like a loop. A sense of loss and emptiness washed over me, creating a lump in my throat. Unable to breathe, I gripped my chest. Yet nothing helped ease the tightening in my chest.

In a fraction of a second, a bloodcurdling scream broke from my lips, drowning out the hammering of my heart against my ribs. What started as a whimper became a full-fledged outcry, forcing my body to quiver and my lips to quake.

"Sierra, sweetheart, it's time for you to wake up." Someone shook me awake, and a soft, familiar voice soothed me, breaking through the fog of my somnolence.

I sprang up in bed, my eyes wide with tears streaming down my face, and my trembling hands fisted at my side.

"You are okay," my mother reassured me, rubbing her hand over my back in a circular motion, attempting to soothe me from the nightmare that kept plaguing my dreams. 

Her short, salt-and-peppered hair had become disheveled during the night, now sticking out in odd places. Worry filled her warm caramel eyes. She chanted calming words in my ears. My screams had woken her. I knew it. 

I clung to her, allowing her warmth to shroud me in a protective bubble of security. My eyes closed on instinct and I panted, my pulse coming to a slow rhythmic beat. 

"You are safe," she murmured, her hand brushing through my hair. "Did you have the same dream as last time?" She inquired as she drew away from the hug.

I hung my head, nodding in response to her query. Why was this happening to me?

"Do you remember anything?" 

I shook my head, not trusting my voice to be strong.

For the second time, she embraced me and kissed the top of my head, saying, “I wish I could take this nightmare away.” I clung to her petite figure, holding back the tears threatening to spill onto my cheeks.

"Are you okay now?" My mother asked, her voice sympathetic. My tears had ceased, and I was not convulsing anymore. I nodded. "Yeah, I think so." 

"Okay. How about I make us some breakfast?" She kissed my forehead, gave my hand a gentle squeeze, and departed from my room. 

Thereupon my mom's exit, I started trembling and hyperventilating. "What the heck was that?!" I let out between breaths, freaking out. I clutched my chest to steady my beating heart, but no such luck. My hand flew to my neck, instinctively, where I felt my flesh burn. There was nothing there. No mark, no scar or burn. 

Nothing—only the softness of my unblemished skin. That dreadful dream again. Yet, every time I was awake, I could not recall a single detail. Only pain, dread, and an emptiness in my heart in fear of losing someone. Someone I loved. But who?

***

Minutes later, a rap of knocks sounded on the door, shaking me out of my daze. "Sweetheart?" My mom’s voice seeped under the door. I heaved a sigh of relief at her voice. Get a grip, Sierra, I chastised myself.

“It’s open,” I said. The door opened, and she poked her head inside, a warm smile enlightening her face. “I am off to the clinic. Unless you would rather, I stay home today?” She arched a brow in suggestion.

“That will not be necessary. Thanks, though.” I returned her smile.

“All right… well, I left you a plate in the microwave for when you are ready.”

"Erm, thanks.”

“Call me if you need me?”

“Will do,” I said, fidgeting with my fingers under the covers.

“I love you, baby girl.”

“Love you too, mom.” With that, she closed the door, and I hopped out of bed. I strolled over to the window when I heard the front door close, exhaling a deep sigh. Her car pulled out from the carport, and a moment passed before I headed off to the bathroom.

In the years following my father’s death, my mother had played an important part in my life. Even during mourning for the man, she loved and lost, she was always there for me. I had my best friend Katie and my boyfriend Jensen by my side, but having my mother share our memories of him at that trying time was invaluable, and I would not trade her for anything. Except for the times when her maternal instincts to protect me got in the way. I adore her, but it would not hurt her to loosen her hold on me from time to time.

Today, I was not feeling like myself, and I wondered perhaps if it had anything to do with the nightmare. Who knew?

***

A few minutes later, I entered the kitchen wearing acid-washed jeans and a white raw silk blouse with long brocade sleeves, my waist-length dark red hair coiled in a single braid, tossed over my left shoulder.

Just as my mother said, I discovered a plate of scrambled eggs and toast in the microwave. I made myself a cup of coffee and grabbed a seat, immediately diving in. 

My phone buzzed with a text message shortly after.

[Katie] Do you want to meet for lunch today? My treat for being such an awesome friend.

You are feeling yourself today, aren’t you? Time and place. [Sierra]

[Katie] If only I did not have some bad news. Terry's @ noon.

What bad news? What is going on? [Sierra]

Nothing came following my last text and I could not help the edgy feeling that overcame me. Katie knew about my nightmares. She was my best friend and knew everything about me. I could not handle any bad news today, but I would wait to hear what she had to say.

***

After breakfast, I went about our single-family two-bedroom, one-bathroom home, moving furniture, cleaning, and sweeping so my mother would not have to do it when she got home from work later. 

Next, I went to my room, made my bed, and opened the windows to let some light in. Then I went to my mother's room to do the same and tossed our dirty clothes in the washing hamper. Our house was not huge or overflowing with finery, but it was cozy and uniquely ours.

When the time came, I took my brown leather backpack, put on my white tennis shoes, tucked my phone away, and got into my car.

I was on my way to meet Katie when I pulled off to the side of the road to shoot my mum a quick text. It only took me a minute to type the text and press send when, out of nowhere, something big and fuzzy sped across in front of the car to the other side of the road. It happened so quickly. I didn't even have a minute to make out what it was.

There were no bears in Holden. None I had ever seen before, at least. So, what was that? My mind raced at the various possibilities plaguing my mind from what I saw. However, nothing made sense in terms of what I assumed it could have been. Besides, it did not slow down long enough for me to determine what it was.

Anyway, I continued driving. I pulled into an empty parking spot outside Terry’s café five minutes later. I checked the rearview mirror to see other parked cars surrounding me. Without a doubt, they were already inside, enjoying Terry’s coffee and sandwiches.

I locked my car, checked my surroundings, and went inside the trendy establishment, searching for a strawberry blonde mess of curls.

Terry's Cafe had long been our favorite hangout. Matter-of-fact, I could not recall when we did not dine here. Other than the pleasant and friendly atmosphere, the excellent service provided by the employees left each patron with a sense of welcome. It was always peaceful there.

I stood in the cafeteria doorway, my gaze flitting from line to line. The enticing aroma of delicious greasy pizza drifted from the suffocatingly overcrowded entrance toward my nose, causing me to let out a satisfied moan. 

In my periphery, I noticed a hand waving at me from a booth. I offered a smile in her direction as I battled my way through the crowd of waiting customers, muttering "excuse me" here and "coming through" there. It took some time, but I eventually made my way through the crowd and reached an apologetic Katie. Being it the lunch hour, it was not her fault.

"I am so sorry; I had forgotten how chaotic it gets in here at this hour." She mused, standing to greet me with a hug.

I took my seat after removing my bag and draped the straps over the back of the chair. "Put away all that. We've both witnessed how crazy Terry's cafe could get." She laughed effortlessly, and I joined her in her laughter. 

Some minutes later, the server arrived and took our orders. The café had lost most of its waiting customers when our meals came, but the dining room was still bustling with people laughing, eating, and enjoying one another's company.

Katie and I had spoken about almost anything and everything throughout the rush hour. She had even told me about her boss, who was still hitting on her despite her several rejections. When I questioned her why she didn't give him a chance, she merely shrugged and acted indifferently.

However, in a matter of seconds, our conversation shifted to my boyfriend, Jensen, which caught me off-guard. "I am not sure what's causing this sudden interest in my boyfriend." I glanced at her, reaching for the last fry from my plate. Katie took a sip of her drink, her features highlighted by trepidation. "No, Sierra, it's not what you think."

I peered up at her under my long lashes, puzzled at where the conversation was going. “Does this have anything to do with the bad news you mentioned in your text?”

A nod was her response. “Look, we've been friends for over six years, and I only want the best for you,” she murmured, chewing on her bottom lip. The mood between us changed, becoming tense. I did not understand what was happening or where she was going with this line of conversation. In an instant, my mouth dried with a bad taste. I suppose it was a forewarning of her next words. My pulse raced into double time and I had to force myself to breathe, but each breath was an effort.

 “Katie, I love you, but you are making me nervous. Tell me what is going on before I lose my mind.”

She blew out a breath. “You and Jensen had been dating for over a year, and you love him... but how well do you know him?"

My cutlery clung to the plate. I cleaned any food crumbs from my lips with a napkin and focused my full attention on my best friend. "In terms of love, I love him enough to envisage a future with him, which only means I trust him enough to want that."

“That is what scares me, Sierra. You love this guy, but how do you know he wants what you want?” Her words lingered in the air as the server returned to retrieve our empty plates and offer us dessert, which we both declined.

"Thank you," I said with a grin to the server. Once we were alone again, the conversation resumed. "What is this about, Katie?" I asked, sitting back in my chair. 

Katie sighed. "You know I love you like a sister, Sierra, and I would not want to see you mistreated." I nodded, giving her permission to proceed. She averted her gaze. It must be something significant, I reasoned. She was not one to shy away from confrontation. She had a reputation for snapping at anyone who looked at her improperly.

Katie dropped her gaze to the table, something fighting to come out. "He is cheating on you," she blurted, "I spotted him making out with another woman.”

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