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35) check mate
Kim
The darkness eats at me, mocks me. I used to love darkness - being snuggled up with Reece in bed at night; staying late at work and watching the city breathe - but now, it’s lonely. This room is filled with extraneous amounts of crap and yet it feels empty, I feel empty. No more am I filled with the life blooming in my womb. I’m empty.
And all I keep thinking about is Reece. Not how he would want me home safe and sound but how angry he’ll be. Angry at me for choosing to send Matteo home instead of bargaining for our babies life.
I wanted a baby, I truly did, and I would have loved it with my whole heart but I have to admit, it feels like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. I feel so, free.
Maybe I’m just loosing my mind!
I’m probably loosing my mind. I love my mate and I want a baby with him.
But… why do I feel this relieved if that’s what I want?
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