A LOVE BORN OF HATE.

NICOLE.

God, I was late.

My best friend is getting married and I am going to be her chief bridesmaid.

The constant ringing of my phone prompted me to pull over at the side of the road. It was probably Brittney calling me to ask why I was running late to her wedding.

My morning had started out in a weird way and that had nothing to do with waking up to an empty bed space, I was used to that. But it had everything to do with my pregnancy results.

I was pregnant.

I should be more joyous than this, probably excited to tell my absent husband about it but there was this little feeling nagging at me at the back of my mind like he was occupied with something.

But Marcus wouldn’t cheat, he loves me too much for that. He makes me feel like the prettiest woman in the world and that was enough to make me happy.

I reached for my phone and turned off my engine. I was probably parked horizontally but Brittney was panicking and I needed to assure her that I was a few feet away from her wedding venue.

I placed my phone on my ear and she said on the next beat “Where are you?”

Exhaling a breath and taking my bag from the passenger seat, I opened my car door before answering. “Just a second away, I am so sorry”

“You are the freaking chief bride maid Nicole, you shouldn’t be late to my fucking wedding” she retorted almost immediately.

“I know I know. But Brit you wouldn’t believe–“

The loud beep made me move my phone away from my ear, staring at it with disbelief. She didn’t just hang up on me, did she?

Scoffing, I tugged the hem of my bright yellow gown down feeling like today was a mess when I wasn’t even half way through the day but at least I am pregnant?

I made my way to the hall, noticing the wedding had already begun. Plastering a grimace, I entered the church and almost all heads whipped back to look at the person who interrupted the priest’s next words.

Muttering a bunch of sorry, I padded my feet to sit with the congregation since walking to the place where I was meant to sit would surely bring more attention to me and I wasn’t a sucker for that.

I sat and exhaled a breath and at that moment, Brittney decided to look up and her eyes connected with me.

A huge smile painted my face almost instantly even though there was a huge disappointment painted across hers.

My smile in place, I looked towards the groom of the day and the wind that blew swept my smile away.

What the hell was my husband doing standing there as the groom?

Was I seeing things wrong?

I ran my palm through my face not caring to ruin my makeup. I blinked hard and I was indeed seeing things right.

My husband was standing on that altar.

I forced a cackle. it wasn’t what I was thinking, it couldn’t be.

Perhaps the groom was late and my husband happened to be there as a substitute till he came but the way he was looking at her–was that fondness?…Was this how Marcus looks at someone he is in love with?

I don’t know how but his head turned to the crowd, his eyes moving around, searching for someone in a congregation of people, then his eyes connected with mine and he had the guts to look surprised?

And my poor best friend was also smiling at him, unknown her husband to be staring at his wife with shock?

This was a soap opera, where were the cameras? This is definitely a ‘prank the bride’s best friend before her wedding’ because what better joke than this?

The ringing in my head started and I could barely hear my husband saying ‘I do’ to my best friend while he was still staring at me.

There I sat in my yellow dress in a row filled with people wearing white and my positive pregnancy result seated in my bag, the weight of it almost as heavy as my heart.

I looked around, waiting for the point where the lamp starts looking weird.

I was definitely dreaming.

Amidst the chaos making a mess of my mind, I could distinctively hear the priest ask “Is there anyone who isn’t in support of this marriage–“

I lifted my hand, stopping him from saying any further. We all knew what came after that.

Series of whispers broke around and I sat basking in the light of what was about to go down even as my breaths came in pauses.

I wasn’t mentally prepared for this, I wasn’t prepared for the attention or the embarrassment that was about to come with this but they did this intentionally to hurt me.

They hadn’t considered how I would feel about this.

Marcus had no decency to end our marriage before jumping into one with my best friend and Brittney hadn’t bothered to inform me that I was going to be the chief bridesmaid to a wedding where my husband is the groom.

Their betrayal knew no bounds. They couldn’t go deeper than this, this was a fucking deep end and it felt like I had the calmness of a saint to let this go on for this long.

I stood up, my hands shaking that I felt this is going to be the end of me. Was this a pregnancy symptom? Was it supposed to feel like my heart was lodged in my throat?

Damn the pregnancy hormones, it felt hard to breathe that my heart was thumping loudly against my rib cage.

Was I ever going to recover from this?

That seemed like the question of the century right now.

“I do” I said almost in a broken whisper but they could hear me just fine since the church was deathly silent.

They were probably wondering what a maniac in yellow was doing interrupting a beautiful wedding in session but they didn’t know I was holding onto a figment of my sanity, that was all they had left me with– a remnant of my sanity.

“Yes?” The priest asked.

Everyone stared at me, probing me to go further even though it felt like I had no words to use.

Taking in a deep breath, I settled with the string of words my mind could form at that moment.

“That man standing on that alter is my husband”