I forgot how to breathe

Athonia’s POV

Maya never puts anything under her bed. Says it makes the room look messy. So this box? Definitely not hers. Jayden’s maybe? I shook my head. Nope. I needed to finish changing Vivienne first. I picked her up from the crib and laid her gently on the bed. Wiped her down, added powder, and slipped on a fresh diaper.

Once she was clean and back in the crib, I turned to the box again. I had not stepped into this room in so long, maybe that was why the box caught my eye. It just stood out. Now I knew why. Inside were colourful papers, letters. I pulled one out.

Yup. Love letters. Lots of them. Different names. Different dates. From grade school to college. Wow. My sister had fans. From childhood to grown-up life. Must be nice.I wish I had that too, right? Haha.

I kept going. There were photos now. Her and her exes, one after the other. I smiled. She really kept everything. If Jayden saw these, would he get jealous? Would they argue? Turns out, my sister’s the type who saves everything, love notes, photos, even old movie tickets. Me? I cannot even keep a receipt. I lose stuff left and right. Total mess. Lol.

I kept digging, still curious. Then I found it. My smile dropped. A photo. Maya… being hugged from behind. The guy?

Ethan.

I blinked. Bit my lip. Looked again. No. No way. Maybe someone who just looks like him? There are look-alikes everywhere, right? I was about to toss the photo back into the box when I saw it, writing on the back.

“I love you, Babe. I love you. Ethan.

 Ethan, MY FIRST LOVE.”

My jaw dropped. What? WHAT?! The guy I slept with… was her first love? Seriously? Fate, are you joking right now? I never knew this. I always thought her first love was Kuya Luke. I even knew her college boyfriends by name. How did this one slip past me?

Then I stared harder at the picture. In the background? The Eiffel Tower. Paris. They looked young. Maybe 13, 14. Then it hit me, Maya stayed with Grandma in Paris when she was 13. My knees went weak.

“What the hell…” I muttered.

My heart felt like it just dropped into my stomach. How did this even happen? What kind of twisted fate is this? One second, I am having a one-night stand. The next, I find out he is her first love? Seriously, Fate? Why him? But time moved fast. Too fast. Before I knew it, my break was over. Back to work.

In all my years as a nurse, I had never dreaded a shift like this. The hospital had always been my safe place. Patients, co-workers, they were like family. But now? I would rather stay home. Too bad I could not. They needed me. I had to show up. So here I am, driving to St. Calisha.

Halfway through, my phone rang. Maya. Declined. She called again. Declined. Again. Ugh. She was testing my patience. I was driving. It was not the time. I sighed and answered, voice as flat as possible. “Hello?”

“Oh?” she said, acting awkward.

“Hmm?”

“Ahm, Ath… sorry. You haven’t been replying. You stayed at the condo for three days straight, and I…”

“Just say it. What do you want?”

“You’re the only one who hasn’t gotten her dress fitted. The party’s on Friday, remember?”

“Fine. I’ll go later.”

Click. Call ended.

I rolled my eyes.

Back to driving. Let my playlist take over.

Minutes later, I arrived at the hospital. I parked, sat still for a beat, and scanned the area. My eyes checked every direction, no sign of him. Thank God. I grabbed my bag and wallet and stepped out.

“Baby!”

My heart jumped for a second.

“Hey, Baby Ath!”

I turned and sighed in relief. 

“You’re so loud, Mathias,” I said with a scowl. “It’s too early for this.”

“Aww, Baby Ath is mad. Come on, hug me. I missed you,” he pouted, arms wide open like a big baby.

I smacked his arm. “You’re annoying.”

Meet Mathias. My boy best friend. Also Kezzy’s cousin. A doctor here at St. Calisha too. Handsome? Yes. Licensed and smart? Absolutely. But still acts like a toddler most days. He jokes non-stop, loves to tease me, and clings like a koala. But when it comes to surgery? Game face on. He is brilliant. Unlike him. Ethan.

I have never even seen Ethan work. I am not curious either. I have not read a thing about him, no interviews, no hospital buzz. Unlike the rest of the staff swooning over him.

“Hey, you okay?” Mathias asked, snapping me out of my thoughts.

“Haha, yes. Come on. We’re going to be late.”

We started walking toward the entrance, but my eyes could not help it, left, right, and behind. Every few steps, I checked. Just in case he popped up beside me… again.

“Are you sure nothing’s wrong? You’re acting kinda weird,” Mathias asked, eyes narrowed.

“Huh? No! Nothing!” I replied too fast.

“You sure?”

“Yes, yes! I’m fine!” I said, flashing him my sweetest fake smile. Time flew. Before I knew it, it was 6:00 PM. Still no sign of Ethan. Thank God.

I was actually getting good at this. It had become automatic. Every time I heard whispers or gasps, I knew he was near. And when that happened? I turned. Hid. Switched hallways. Anything to avoid him.

So far, it was working. But I knew I would not be this lucky forever. Sooner or later, we would bump into each other. I could feel it. And when that day comes? I have no idea what I’ll do.

Sigh. Whatever. Let fate wait a little longer. I walked into the next room for bloodwork.

“Hi! Good evening, Ma’am and baby girl,” I greeted with a smile. “I’ll be taking a little blood now, okay?”

The little girl looked at me, lips trembling, ready to cry.

“What’s your name, sweetie?” I asked gently.

She sniffled… then burst into tears.

“Shhh, baby, it’s okay. Don’t cry,” I said softly, kneeling beside her. “We’re just taking out the bad stuff so you can feel better, alright? And after that, you’ll get a gift. What would you like?”

She hiccupped and wiped her nose.

“D-Doll…”

“A doll? Perfect! I’ll get you a doll. And guess what? I’ll add a dollhouse too!” I grinned. “But first, we have to take out the bad stuff, okay?”

She nodded slowly.

“Alright, give sis a big hug. Close your eyes.”

I inserted the needle gently. She held onto me tightly, but she stayed brave.

“All done! You did it! So strong!” I cheered. “I’ll be back soon, okay? With your doll.”

She gave me a tiny smile. My heart melted.

Tok! Tok!

A knock. Her mum opened the door.

“Oh, Doc, it’s you,” she said.

I turned slightly, about to glance, then I heard it.

“Yeah, I just want to check on the little girl before her operation.” My whole body stiffened. My stomach dropped.

Ethan.

No. No. Not now. I swallowed hard and stayed still, eyes wide, hands shaking just a little.

I kept my back turned, pretending to arrange something on the tray. If I moved fast, I could maybe slip out before..

“Hi.”

That voice. Right behind me now. Slowly, I turned around. And there he was. White coat. Stethoscope. Eyes locked on mine. My chest tightened. For a second, I forgot how to breathe.