Fractured Loyalties

**CALISTA**

My mother was already waiting when I got home.

I felt it in the suffocating silence that echoed through the foyer, save for the sound of my heels clicking against the polished floors.

My chest tightened with the need for a stiff drink, but I headed into the kitchen for the only thing that won't hurt my child.

Water.

I burst through the double doors, almost colliding with a servant who nursed a mug of steaming herbs.

“My apologies, ma'am.” She courtesied.

“Where is my mother?” I asked, eyeing the greenish smoke curling from the mug. “and what is that?”

“Your new tea, ma'am. For your…fertility.” Her cheeks bloomed red.

My stomach churned with fresh rage. Every month, my mother came up with a new herbal concoction, desperate to force life into my ‘shrunken womb’.

“My mother—where is she?”

She hesitated, eyes darting around the room.

“In the study, ma'am.” Her voice lowered. “She is… in a mood.”

Mother was always in a mood, but I could tell from the fear etched in the servants face, that today was off the charts.

I had just died, so she couldn't be having it any worse than me.

I turned for the stairs, heart pounding.

“Shall I take your tea to your room?” The servant asked behind me.

“Pour it down the sink.” I ordered, jaw tight.

I bounded up the stairs, ignoring the faint protest behind me.

I was already pregnant, no matter how temporary it was to be.

The study door sat shut at the end of the hallway, and each step forward twisted knots in my stomach.

Father's study had been locked all these years since his death, his memories frozen in time…until today.

Now my mother was behind this door, and every memory I ever had in this room was about to be altered, yet I knocked anyway.

“Come in.” My mother's stiff voice echoed, and I twisted the knob and stepped gingerly into the musty room, floor creaking under my weight.

A cobweb stuck to my cheek as I weaved past the huge shelf blocking the entrance, and my eyes found my mother standing behind father's large desk, empty glass in hand.

For a moment, I saw my father with his wiry black hair hunched over the desk, writing. He looked up at me with the warmest smile, but disappeared when I blinked, leaving my mother and the hatred in her eyes.

Her greyish hair was slicked back in a tight bun, lending credence to her withering frown.

“Where were you today?” Her voice cracked through the dusty haze.

I cleared my throat.

“I needed some air.”

Her brows creased.

“Right in the middle of a board meeting? Do not act smart with me. Merrick called. He said you refused to sign the documents.”

Hearing my husband's name raised the hairs on my neck, and I felt myself shiver.

“I merely wanted to rethink my decision.” My voice faltered.

“And why is that? It's a done deal. All you had to do was sign.”

“It wasn't that simple, mother.”

“Do not give me that excuse!” She shook her glass at me, eyes flashing.

“When I was in your shoes, I did a better job. I always got the job done.” She muttered, setting the glass on the cluttered desk with a hiss.

“You have always made that very clear, mother.” I nodded, lips pursed.

“And yet, you refused to follow my example. If only your father was still here…” she reached for the crucifix pendant resting on her chest.

“You must sign those documents, Calista. I do not want to hear about this again.”

“But—”

“It is the least you can do for this company!” Her voice rose, and I fell silent, pulse thudding in my throat.

She cleared her throat, clutching her pendant tightly, and continued in an even tone.

“Merrick is a good man, and a very good business partner. It is already sad that you cannot give him children, but to deprive him of this opportunity is just…wicked.”

I expected this, yet my heart sank as the weight of her words crushed everything but the life inside me.

“Do you even want to know why I changed my mind?” I asked, forcing my voice to stay still.

“No, dear. You do not get it, do you?” She pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed deeply.

“Our company is at the brink of a major milestone, and only Merrick Fairfax can get us there. If you do not sign those documents, we stand the risk of losing Fairfax investors. They have to know that their footing is stronger than before.”

“And then what? Merrick rules and I sit there with a smile? I cannot allow it.” Tears sprang to my eyes, and I prayed they would not fall.

“What you will do, is what the family needs you to do. Sign over the power of attorney to your husband, and focus on important things—like giving him children to fill in the silence.”

“Oh, I bet he is filling in just fine.” A bitter laugh escaped me.

“What is that supposed to mean?” She glared at me, gripping the dusty leather chair in front of her.

“He is cheating on me, mother. With Astrid!” I blurted.

Silence fell over the room, thicker than the dust in the air. I watched my mother's face crumple for a moment, and I dared to think I had an ally.

Long seconds passed, and all I could hear was the sound of my pounding heart.

Then she broke the silence with another sigh, leaning against the chair.

“Oh Calista…” her voice lowered, “is that the reason you want to toss our company to the wind?”

My jaw fell open, and a wave of nausea rocked my feet backwards.

She knew. She always knew, and she kept it from me?

“Do not overreact, Calista. Your sister was just trying to help you.”

“Oh my God…”

“Merrick was always going to wander. You should be grateful that she sacrificed herself—”

SACRIFICED HERSELF?

I was the jilted one, the daughter with a chip on her shoulders and a hostile womb, and Astrid was the one making sacrifices?

“She slept with my husband!”

“Oh please, Calista. You know your marriage to Merrick is just a business deal,” she eyes my belly.“ one which sadly, you are yet to complete.”

“I get it, mother. I am a childless, empty body who only exists for the family's pleasure.”

“Pleasure?” She scoffed, lips curled in a sneer. “Was it pleasurable when you killed my husband?”

Her words stung hard, the venom creeping into my heart before I could even take a breath.

“T-that’s why you called me in here? To remind me of what I did?”

“Yes,” she said, her voice hardening. “And to remind you of what you stand to lose.”

She waved a hand over the room, eyes glinting with unshed tears.

“This company was your father's dream since the day we met. He put in the work while his family sat aside and waited for results. He did all this. And then you…” her breath caught, the weight of words unsaid heavy in the air.

“None of this would have happened if he was still here.”

As much as I hated her at that moment, I knew that she was right.

I killed my father. I robbed Astrid of the opportunity to grow into a better person, took the love of my mother's life from her, and I couldn't even remember what really happened. Each time I tried, the memory slipped farther away. Each time I—

“Listen here, child.” She drew closer until her cologne replaced the taste of dust in my throat.

“Merrick will be back any minute now. Don't make a scene when he arrives. You will talk to him calmly, and you will make this right.”

“No.” my voice bristled.

“Yes, dear, you will do this…for your family. Or I will take whatever power you think you might have.”

I stared into the golden eyes of the woman who birthed me, and I wondered if her hatred for me started after father's death, or if she had always just hated me.

“Fix your marriage, Calista, or I will find someone more suitable, and put her in your place.”

“You mean, someone like Astrid?” I swallowed back tears.

My mother didn't hesitate.

“At least she will give us an heir.” She brushed past me roughly.

“You have until tomorrow to rethink your decision. Do not force my hand.”

And with that, the door slammed shut, raising dust that settled on my arms.

I did not know when my feet carried me to my father's desk, but I sank into the dusty leather seat, eyes fixed on the huge bookshelf blocking half the door.

I felt the pain creeping in, but pain would not get me out of this mess. It would not keep me alive.

I shut my eyes and wished I was dead, so I wouldn't have to hear my mother break what was left of my heart.

Then I opened my eyes, and I was hollow Calista, vengeful Calista.

Merrick may have my past, but Atlas would help me take his future.