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42

*** Melanie ***

I cry as I look at the latest test.

Pregnant.

That is four in a row now. I had finally plucked up the courage to take the test, but I was unbelieving when it came back positive. I tried a different brand; I tried the cheap one and the expensive one and this one is an early response super sensitive one. They all gave the same result.

I am pregnant.

The tears fall because I realise in this moment how much of a fool I have been. I honestly believed Alan when he told me that Helen had got pregnant on purpose to trap him. He never told me he didn’t want children, he said he didn’t want a child with her, but on hearing that I might be pregnant, he has hurt me, told me to get an abortion and basically said that he never wants children full stop.

In those short minutes, I imagined a young, pregnant Helen and how scared she must have felt. How could I have believed him? Unfortunately, I know exactly why: the same reason I forgave him for taking Helen to the ball, for marr
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