Chapter 4

Marissa's POV

  

   I gasped in fear and jumped from the bed. I was right at the edge however and so I landed painfully on the floor. 

 Another nightmare. This was two nights in a row now. I groaned and dragged myself up. My nightdress clung to me, covered in sweat even though the room was cool. 

  I had seen a wolf in my dream. It was chasing me, barreling down the forest as I screamed for my life. But just as the dream was coming to an end, just as the wolf closed its huge maw around my neck, the dream had changed form. Suddenly I couldn't see the wolf anymore but I was still running. Faster, breathing hard. Almost,...panting.

 

I had become the wolf.

 

  The time on the bedside lamp read four thirty. I had an hour to myself before I had to wake the twins up for school. My head felt dizzy and my body weak. Like it hadn't gotten any rest at all through the night. I needed coffee.

  Elias told me not to drink too much coffee. That it was bad for people like us. Werewolves, he meant. 

 I had never transformed before. At least not that I can remember. I couldn't remember anything from before the twins' pregnancy. Elias patiently filled me in. Telling me some things multiple times because my memory got progressively worse until I gave birth. 

 

  I sat at the kitchen counter with my phone in hand while the coffee maker hummed quietly. It was simply a dream wasn't it? I didn't have to call him did I?

  My fingers hovered over the call button. Then I put the phone down. I could still wait a while. I didn't have to disturb him.

   I heard a sniffle from the doorway and smiled to myself. Moment of quiet was over.

 “Hi Sweetie.” I said gently. 

   She sniffed again and rubbed her eyes furiously. “Hi mommy.” She waddled over to me, still sleepy. Her favourite pink teddy was clutched tightly in her hand. She called him pancakes.

  “Good morning baby.” I adjusted to make room for her to climb into my laps. “Why are you up early? Bad dream?” I asked, stroking her blonde hair.

  “No. It was good. Me and pancakes travelled to heaven.” She said drowsily.

  “Um. What?” Was going to heaven a good or bad dream? 

 I cleaned my throat, “Travelled to stay there permanently or…”

  “No, it was a visit.” She replied, patting pancakes head.

  I blew out a tiny breath of relief. She sighed and continued. 

  “It's a pretty place but it was a long journey.” 

 “Really honey?” The coffee maker dinged to a stop but I decided it could wait a little longer. 

 “Yeah. But we'll go again tomorrow”

 “And why is that?”

  “Because we have to go visit my sister.”

             **********

    “Are you okay? You look like you haven't slept in days.” A voice from behind me said in concern. 

 “I'm fine really.” I smiled without turning since I already knew who it was. 

 “Oh, okay. Then move. You're hogging the coffee machine.” 

I rolled my eyes at her and stepped aside. 

  She smirked at me and grabbed a cup for herself. 

 “Good morning Bree.” I mumbled. 

 “Morning yourself. How are the twins?”

 “Doing fine. Ashlyn spoke about her sister again this morning.” I groaned.

 Bree grimaced, “Oof. If that isn't a sign, I don't know what is.”

 “A sign that what?”

 “That you need to get laid.”

   I gasped, but not really In shock or anything. Bridget had made it her life's mission to set me up with someone and brought up the subject at least five times each day. 

 “How many times do I have to say it? I'm not looking to date anyone right now.” I groaned, throwing back the rest of my coffee. I could feel the beginning pangs of a headache.

  “And why is that? You used to say it was because of the kids but they're all grown now.” She countered.

  “Grown? They're barely six.”

 “Yeah. Basically adults if you ask me. Blink and they'll start paying taxes.” She scoffed good naturedly.

 “I can't have this conversation right now. My head feels like it's being taken through a meat grinder. I keep having this weird dream.” 

  “Oh yeah? What about?”

 I paused for a bit. The werewolf thing was a secret. Elias had made sure to stress that part repeatedly. And so far, I hadn't told anyone. Not that I would have any need to. I didn't have my abilities any longer.

  “I keep getting chased by a monster.” I replied at last.

  A smile spreads across Bridget's face. “You know what that means right?”

 “No. What?” I ask, a feeling of dread spreading over me. 

 “That's your body being angry with you. You need to get laid!” Bridget announced triumphantly and a little loudly. 

 “Oh for God's sake!” I slammed the cup back on the counter and walked away while she  cackled with glee.

  I did not need to get laid. I wasn't a prude. I'd been with men. A couple of them over the years. 

Okay only a few. 

Well, just two. But that was more than enough for me. 

 

Thanks to my botched memories, I couldn't remember who the father of my twins was. Elias did. He also knows what happened to him and to our parents. A tragedy, he called it. The reason I lost my memories. 

  He would only tell me about it in vague bits and pieces at first, then he stopped talking about it all together, saying he was afraid making me relive the experience would wipe my memories again. 

  But maybe that's why I couldn't be with anyone else. I couldn't remember the father of my children but when I thought of him, my heart squeezed with yearning and with pain. What we shared must have been so deep, so profound. Anyone else would just pale in comparison.

  Bridget knew all this of course. But did that stop her from trying to play matchmaker? Not in the slightest.