CHAPTER 4

Manny’s POV

I slam the door behind me and resist the urge to lean back on it and listen to her breathing.

She would sense if I do that, she always knows when I linger.

So instead, I walk away with the same stoic expression that I left the room with, masking the storm that’s tearing through me like a wildfire.

My heart in my chest tears itself into a million pieces as my pace quickens until I reach my office.

I try to hold it together. My hands are trembling at my sides, and I ball them into fists to stop the shaking.

As soon as I get in, I turn around and slam the door shut, leaning on it with my eyes closed as I let out a long, bothered sigh.

I feel the breath scrape against my throat. My chest is heavy. The sound of the door echoes like the sound of goodbye. Permanent. Cold.

“Is it done?”

My mother's voice comes at me accusingly from the corner of my room, causing my eyes to snap open.

So much for trying to take a break to think. So much for even a second to breathe.

I do not answer. Instead, I walk to my bed and sit down quietly. My knees feel weak, but I don’t want her to see me crack.

She walks toward me slowly, looking at me with a pitiful expression on her face, fake sympathy barely veiling her satisfaction.

“Are you feeling bad for her?”

Once again, I ignore her and keep my eyes focused on the space ahead of me.

If I look at her, if I meet her eyes, I might say something that I’ll regret. Or worse, I might show how much I’m hurting.

She still touches my shoulder and takes her seat beside me on the bed.

“She’s just a rogue, Manny. She doesn’t even love you.”

I suck in a deep breath and close my eyes again. I want to scream at her, tell her she’s wrong, that Lexi loved me when no one else saw me. She looked past the title, the power, the name, and saw me. But my lips stay sealed. It’s safer that way.

“I asked her to leave, Mum. I gave her some money to go away.”

The words feel like acid in my mouth. I hate how easy it sounds. Like a transaction. Like Lexi meant nothing to me. When in truth, she is everything.

I hear my mother scowl as I mention the money I gave to Lexi.

“I wouldn’t have paid her if I were you. I’m pretty sure she just wanted to scam her way into our empire.”

I clench my jaw. My fingers twitch. But still, I say nothing.

“Well, it doesn’t really matter, does it? She’s leaving,” I say before falling backwards on my bed.

My tone is hollow. Detached. Like I’m convincing myself of something I don’t believe.

I don’t hear whatever else my mother has to say as I close my eyes and drift into deep thought.

I hate how hurt Lexi looked when I told her she had to leave. That flash of betrayal in her eyes haunts me.

The way she clutched her stomach, trying to shield our unborn children from the weight of my words.

I never want to hurt her like that again.

I can't wait for her to look inside the envelope and see the note I left in for her.

Don’t worry, Lexi.

As soon as I gain control of the situation here, I will come back and take you, my love.

We will raise our kids together and they will love you as their mother.

As I stir from my trance, I realize that my mother is no longer in the room with me.

I didn’t even notice when she left. Or maybe I just didn’t care.

I heave wearily and get off the bed. As I sit up, I come face to face with my reflection in the gigantic and regal mirror stretched out before me.

My appearance is ghastly. My eyes are sunken. My skin is pale with exhaustion.

For someone who just became a father of twins with the love of his life, I am far from cheerful.

There should have been joy. Laughter. Celebration. But all I feel is dread. All I hear is silence where Lexi’s voice should be.

I wish that it could have been easier for Lexi and me.

I love my mother, and I would say her hatred for strays is justified because of their unpredictable and criminal nature, but she is wrong about Lexi.

Lexi did not choose to be my mate. The moon brought us together, and we inevitably fell in love with each other.

It was real. It was pure. It was everything the old ways couldn’t understand.

Unfortunately, I cannot love her unafraid, not without the wrath of my mother and all the pack elders storming down on both of us.

I am afraid for her safety, and that of our children, so I am forced to comply with my mother's schemes.

In the envelope I threw to Lexi, I left her a hard drive containing the details to a bitcoin account worth twenty million dollars.

It has to be enough to tide her over until I can purge the pack’s board of advisors of the people who are loyal to my mother instead of to me.

My father’s grave is still warm, so my mother is still the people’s Luna.

She still has everyone’s sympathy, since she is building her platform on all the good my father did in his lifetime.

And she’s using that sympathy to tighten her grip around me like a noose.

I do not plan to keep Lexi away from the twins for very long, so I have about a year to show the people that I am a leader deserving of their respect — because I am willing to earn it, rather than building on my father and mother’s works.

As I get up and head to my office, all I can think about is how happy Lexi, the twins, and I will be once I sort out everything with the pack and with my mother.

I just need time. Just a little more time…

I can almost feel the warmth of her skin on mine again. I can almost hear her melodious voice telling me how much she loves me.

I am pained by the fact that she did not even get the chance to name our babies. Her babies.

My heart aches for her already, but I cannot go to her.

Now that she has delivered the babies, my mother no longer has any use for her.

It is already a miracle that I have been able to send her away peacefully without any bloodshed.

I do not want any complications.

****

I watch in horror as Lexi stares down the edge of the cliff while clutching our son tightly in her grasp.

“No…” I mutter and shake my head softly.

She shouldn’t have to work so hard to take her own child away from me.

She shouldn’t have to choose between peace and survival.

I want to run towards her and pull her to myself, to kiss her and tell her to come back into the arms of my protection, but I know, I know, my mother is watching from a distance.

And I know what she would do to Lexi if I falter.

I wonder if Lexi opened the envelope I gave her.

Did she see the note?

Did she understand what I meant?

Did she know I was only pretending, only acting out a role, for her safety?

In a flash of courage, I move my feet toward her to stop her.

At this moment, I am ready to damn all the people I was afraid to disappoint if it will make her stay, if it will save her.

But before I can get to her, to breathe words of my devotion, she kisses our son on his forehead and takes a dive.

“No!”

My voice comes out broken as it cuts through the void.

I rush to the edge of the cliff and look down, my chest thumping loudly and almost causing my ears to bleed from the sound.

I can hear some of the men around me whispering.

“There’s no way anyone can survive that jump, much less with a baby.”