Chapter 4: CHANGE OF MIND

School didn’t feel normal after Friday, because people kept looking at me in the hallways and I knew it wasn’t because anything had actually happened, it was just that Daniel walked me to class and apparently that was enough to make everyone decide something was going on, even though I wasn’t sure what that something was myself.

Liv noticed before first period, and although she didn’t say anything right away, she handed me my notebook the way she always did, except this time her eyes were asking questions she didn’t voice yet, and when she finally spoke it was only to say Daniel’s name like it was a test I hadn’t studied for.

“What about him?”

I asked it even though I already knew what she meant, because I’d been avoiding that question since I got out of Daniel’s car on Friday night.

“You went to dinner.”

She said it direct, the way Liv always was when she knew I was pretending.

“Yeah.”

I said it because denying it would have been pointless, and then I added, “It was fine,” even though the word felt empty as soon as it left my mouth.

“Fine.”

Liv repeated it, and the way she said it made it sound like the worst review she’d ever heard, but the bell rang before she could push further, and I was grateful for the interruption even if it was temporary.

Daniel found me by my locker before second period, holding two coffees like he’d known exactly what I’d need, and he handed me one without asking if I wanted it because with Daniel everything was already decided, from the way he opened doors to the way he asked about my day like he was checking items off a list he’d made in advance.

“Morning.”

His voice was even and polite, the same way it had been at dinner, the same way it was when he asked if I’d slept okay and then told me he’d walk me to chem lab after school even though I hadn’t asked him to, because with Daniel there were no questions, only statements that sounded like offers but felt like plans.

That was how the day went, with Daniel there at my locker and at lunch and after third period, always holding doors and carrying books I hadn’t asked him to carry, and every time he did something perfect, Liv would look at me from across the table like she was waiting for me to admit that perfect didn’t feel the way I thought it would.

At lunch she cornered me by the vending machines, finally saying out loud what she’d been thinking all morning.

“You don’t like him.”

“I didn’t say that.”

“You didn’t have to. You get quiet when you’re faking.”

I bought water and didn’t drink it. Daniel was waiting at our table. He’d saved me a seat. Again.

The real problem didn’t start until after sixth period, when I decided to take the back stairwell because it was faster to the chem lab and I was already running late, and that was when I heard voices that were too loud for an empty hallway, and when I rounded the corner I saw three guys from the football team standing in a half circle, with Cole backed against the lockers and one of them pressing a hand to his chest like he was keeping him there.

Cole wasn’t fighting back, he was just standing there with his jaw tight and his eyes on the floor, and his knuckles were already split and bleeding, fresh enough that I knew whatever had happened was still happening, and before I could think it through my voice came out louder than I intended.

“Hey.”

All four of them turned, and the guy in the middle dropped his hand and stepped back like he’d been caught doing something he shouldn’t, and when he said my name it sounded like a surprise, like he hadn’t expected me to be the one to interrupt.

“Chen. This isn’t—”

Leave.”

I said it without knowing if I was talking to all of them or just the one with his hand on Cole.

They looked at Cole, then at me, and then they left slowly, like they were weighing whether I was worth the trouble, and when they were gone the hallway felt too quiet except for the sound of Cole’s breathing and the drip of blood from his knuckles onto the tile.

“You shouldn’t have done that.”

He said it without looking at me, still leaning against the lockers like he needed them to hold him up.

“They were going to hit you again.”

“Maybe.”

He finally lifted his head.

“Maybe I deserved it.”

He said it like it was the kind of thing Cole would say when he didn’t want to explain himself.

“Why?”

I asked, and when he didn’t answer he just pushed off the lockers and started walking down the hall like the conversation was over, so I followed him because I wasn’t done asking questions.

“Cole.”

He kept walking.

“Cole.”

I said it again, louder, until he stopped and turned without really looking at me.

“What.”

It wasn’t a question so much as a warning.

“Your hand. And your face.”

I needed him to acknowledge it, because I needed this to be real and not something I was imagining.

“You’re late for chem.”

He said it like that was a reason to leave, which was true, and it was also his way of telling me to go.

“So are you.”

I said it because he always skipped sixth period and we both knew it.

He ran a hand through his hair and winced when he brushed his knuckles.

“Go to class, Chen.”

“No.”

That made him actually look at me for the first time since the guys left.

“Why not?”

His voice was tired, not angry.

“Because you showed up.”

The words felt true as soon as I said them.

“Last week in the library, when Daniel—”

I stopped because I didn’t know how to finish that sentence, so I just said, “You don’t even like me,” because that was easier than saying anything else.

“I never said that.”

The bell rang while we were standing there, making us officially late, but neither of us moved because the hallway was empty now and the only sound was the hum of the lights overhead.

“Come on.”

bleeding and his lip was cut and I couldn’t just leave him there, and when he didn’t argue he followed me inside, leaning against the sink while I pulled paper towels from the dispenser and ran them under water.

“Why were they on you?”

I asked as I dabbed at his knuckles, and he hissed but didn’t pull away, and for a long time he didn’t answer, until finally he said, “Because I told Mark to stay away from you.”

I stopped with the paper towel halfway to his hand.

“What?”

“After Friday.”

His eyes were on the floor.

“He said some stuff about you and Daniel, about bets, and I told him to shut up.”

The word _bets_ landed in my stomach like a stone, cold and heavy.

“Cole.”

“Don’t.”

He cut me off.

“It’s stupid. I’m stupid.”

His voice didn’t sound convinced, it just sounded tired.

“You’re bleeding.”

I said it again, because I didn’t know what else to say, because I didn’t know what to do with the idea that someone had been betting on me like I was a game.

He looked up then, and his eyes weren’t guarded for once, they weren’t anything but tired and honest.

“Yeah. Well, you showed up too.”

That was his way of saying thank you without saying it.

The bathroom door opened then, and Daniel stood there holding my chem book, and when he saw me standing there with bloody paper towels in my hand and Cole leaning against the sink with a cut lip, his expression didn’t change, it just went very still in a way that was worse than if he’d been angry.

“Chen.”

My name sounded careful in his mouth, like he was handling something fragile.

“You missed class.”

“I know.”

There wasn’t anything else to say.

“I brought your book.”

He held it out, and he didn’t step inside and he didn’t look at Cole, he just stood there in the doorway like he was waiting for me to make a choice.

“Thanks.”

I said it, but I didn’t take it yet, because taking it felt like choosing, and I wasn’t ready to choose.

Daniel’s eyes flicked to Cole’s knuckles, then back to me.

“You okay?”

“Yeah. I’m fine.”

Fine was the same word I’d used with Liv and we both knew what it really meant.

He nodded once, set the book on the sink, and left without another word, and the door swung shut behind him with a sound that felt final, even though nothing had been decided.

Cole exhaled like he’d been holding his breath.

“You should go.”

“Why did you really come here today?”

I needed to know, because I needed this to make sense.

He met my eyes and held them.

“Because Aaron said you looked like you were walking to your own execution when you left with Reed this morning.”

The fact that Aaron had seen me, that Cole had asked, that any of this was happening, made my chest feel tight.

“You didn’t have to play savior.”

My voice came out softer than I intended.

“Maybe not. But you looked like you needed one.”

Then he pushed off the sink and walked out, leaving my chem book behind, leaving me standing there with bloody paper towels and a choice I hadn’t made yet.

I stayed for a minute after he left, listening to the sounds of school continuing outside the door, and I thought about how Daniel was polite and safe and brought me books when I was late, and how Cole got into fights and lied about it and showed up anyway, and I realized I still didn’t know who the check mark on my whiteboard was supposed to be for.