Trust is built in a second

    Its been a month, since Evander picked Bella, and has since then, shown her a world, one that wasn't even in her dreams. All she knew was violence, and he gave her peace. All she knew was pain, and he gave her healing, all she saw was blood and gore, he showed her nature and arts and flowers, she was used to the sound of helpless screams and metal, he gave her music, laughter and kind words.

         And amidst all of this, he gave her trust, both his and hers, he gave her companionship, love, and even though all of these were great, she knew that this was not her life. This can never be her life. She had to get back, no matter what.

"Penny for your thoughts?"

 She looked up.

"I wasn’t thinking about anything."

 " you were,"

 he said assertively.

 "You do that thing where you rub your lower lip with your tongue real fast, and your eyes become smaller and darker, and you only stare at one place."

 He said in a breath, leaning on the wall and balancing the tray he had brought in with him. It held chocolate, of all sorts and parfait.

 "Whatever."

She scoffed and stood up, extending her hand to take a chocolate, and he slapped her hand away. It wasn’t even a hard slap, but it was seemingly the first act of violence that she had experienced in over a month, so, naturally, she reacted. She stiffened, her wolf trying to take over. She turned quickly, so he wouldn't see her, he was completely oblivious, even though, the wolf smell became stronger in the room.

 “calm down, calm down."

 She repeated to herself and only turned back to him when she was sure he wouldn’t see anything. He looked at her rather coldly, and she kept her head low.

"You shouldn't have,"

he said, slowly moving to the nearest bedside table to keep the chocolates.

"When you still feel threatened by me, just allow it takeover."

 It wasn’t an advice or encouragement, he was angry. His eyes were darker, but he was in control, not his wolf.

 "Do what you have to do, then."

 He added, and pointed to the chocolates.

" have them. See you later."

         He finished and walked out. She didn't follow him immediately, allowing herself calm down and replay the scene in her head. After he slapped her hand, she hadn’t heard anything he was saying, but now, like she was seeing the scene in a movie, she heard him telling her to not take the mediocre tasting ones, as he had made a mistake when taking them, and some of them tasted terrible, so he would choose them for her, and she should learn to be patient. She held her head and shook, trying hard to clear the scene.

         It wasn’t even her fucking fault that she was trained to react that way, and for goodness sake, she was starved. Very. She sighed, making a mental note to attend to her starvation later, and calm down a seething alpha now. She took a shower, just to calm her nerves, and changed into a dress. She hated the inconvenience, but she was always the annoyed one and he begging her to eat, calm down and all. She might be trouble, but she knew dignity. She was a delta, she had to act like one. Like, royalty.

"Hey."

 He turned his face away, with a "humph" sound. She managed a small smile, even though she thought it was childish.

 "You won't talk to me, alpha?"

 She pried her head and he turned away again, giving her his back.

"I'm wearing a dress. I'm gonna wear it for just ten minutes. You sure you wanna miss it?"

She said again, and he turned just slightly to peek, but she caught his face in her hand and almost reeled him over.

"Gotcha! You cant stay angry, right? Right? Hmm?"

She hated cute acts. He turned away again. They were in his personal garden, just a little garden, but cute as he had made it.. They were sitting on the trim log, one that he kept there so he could relax, and even though not the most comfortable bedding, sleep.

"You don’t get it."

She was looking into his eyes now, and couldn’t bring herself to look away.

"Its just that, its been a month, or so. I mean, there is nothing that i haven't told you, but you still think I will hurt you, or try to do anything bad to you."

He sighed looking down at his fingers.

"But.."

"But what, Bella? The time isn’t long enough? Cause i think it is. Trust is built within a second, Bella. One month, living with me, you still don’t trust me?"

 He cupped her face, and his face was close enough for her to feel his breath.

 "I really like you, Bella. Really. And it hurts to think that you still haven't let me in. I don’t want to rush you, we are wolves, we will be okay. I promise."

But they cant. He came even closer, holding her stare.

"I know the whole mate thing."

 He pulled pack and stretched his hand, beckoning her. "Be my delta, and I never have to find a mate."

His eyes big and expectant, hers small and unsure. When she did what she was planning to do, he would hate her.

"Don’t think too much,"

he smiled now, forgetting the anger and the seriousness.

"We both, have a lifetime."

He was beaming now, and holding her hand like he didn't want to let go, and she knew he didn’t want to. As if reading her thoughts, he said.

"I don’t want to let you go. Ever."

He rested her head on his shoulder, all the while holding her hand. He then rose it and kissed it, lingering for just a moment, before pulling away and smiling. He hummed in delight, as he looked to the flowers.

When she did what she wanted to do, he would hate her, and maybe, just maybe that hate would be a better burden to carry than the one his love imposed on her. You cant love a bad person, she was meant for Cole, someone who was every inch as bad as she was, and that was a match. She didn't deserve a heart like Evander's, because she could break it. And break it, she will.