3.5
When you’re a nurse, you're always needed in every part of the hospital. Everywhere. It's crazy tiring. But you know, it's a good feeling to be able to help to other people. Seeing them smiling at you and thanking you for things you do for them, it's such an amazing and extremely rewarding feeling. I love helping people just as how it also hurts me seeing a patient expire.
Since high school, I wanted to be a nurse by choice because I know I can help my countrymen. I was inspired by the nurses on that movie Pearl Harbor which was really a brave thing for them to do. Ever since after I saw that movie, I wanted to be one someday.
Look at me now, a licensed nurse.
As the hours pass by, another tiring day came to an end and I hurriedly grabbed all of my stuff to fetch Ben. I got inside my car and drove my way to his school. When I got there, I was right on time when Ben was rushing out from his classroom. I squat down as he rushed into my arms with a smile on his face. He hugs me tight and I'm sure he had a great day in school.
"How was your first day baby?" I push his hair off his face.
"I had so much fun mom! I met new friends! We introduced ourselves and I didn't shy away. My teacher even liked my hair because she said it's curly. She said she remembers someone from my hair and my eyes." He begins to talk.
I smiled at myself, I'm sure his teacher was also a SatPatter before. A name for a Satellite Patrol fan back in the days.
"And this boy named Jason came up to me, we both like chocolate and banana shake mommy!" he breathes.
I smiled at Ben. "That's lovely to hear honey. How about we go grab your all time favorite pizza and pasta for dinner? How's that sound?"
"Delicious!" He chimes.
Both of us walked our way back to the car and drove to his favorite food place called Johnny's. We ordered a box of pizza, one chocolate and banana shake for my little boy and a vanilla latte for me.
Ben talked to me about how his first day went in school and mentioned that there were these older girls who kept staring at him. He asked if something was wrong with him and I shyly smiled at how innocent and adorable my six year old son is.
He's a natural born charmer.
Like father like son, indeed.
After having dinner together, we went home and watched his favorite TV show, Adventure Time which became my favorite too.
The following day, I was on night duty in the hospital to cover for my coworker who swapped with me since she was having an emergency. I was busy checking IV bags of the patients then I would rush to the third floor nurse's station because they needed assistance for doing round in the presidential rooms.
"Randy, huge favor. Could you check the IV bag of the patient in room 202-A?" The head nurse asked.
"Yes. Sure I will." I answered with a smile even though I just got on this floor. I guess it is going to be a busy shift.
"Here are the medicine she needs to take. Make sure you take good care of her, she's a pretty valuable patient to us."
I nod at the word, valuable.
I grabbed everything I needed before marching my way to room 202-A. I wonder why she's such a valuable patient to the head nurse, well from the room itself which is a Presidential Suite, I'm sure it's someone with a high profile.
I glance at the patient's medical record, before taking a step inside her room.
Wait, this name seems familiar.
I grabbed the doorknob and smiled as I take a deep breath in while I begin to enter the room.
"Good evening!" I smiled, glancing at my watch to check the time.
Ten thirty-two in the evening.
I walked near the patient's bed and I take a grip tight on the patient's medical record once I saw who the admitted patient was. I was reminded instantly of who it was and I couldn't believe that she is actually here. No wonder her name looked familiar to me.
This is Hugo Saintclare’s mother. AnneSaintclare.
I hear a door creaking open which came from the bathroom and a light from behind me reflects on the wall in front of me. My heart drops as I feel my body stiffened like a plywood.
Holy shit, I don’t have a good feeling about this at all.
"Someone came in?" A voice called out and the light from behind me quickly turned off.
That voice.
I know that voice.
I know that Essex accent.
My heart is racing. No.
This can't be. No.
"Dear, the nurse just came in." Anne says with a smile as she looks at me. Anne has always looked lovely.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Kill me now! Please be her husband. Please don't be that man who I'm guessing you should be. I thought and inwardly chanted those words in my head over and over.
All of a sudden, he pops out from behind me and stands on the opposite side of the hospital bed. I completely froze. Hugo Saintclare stands in front of me with both hands inside his pockets, wearing a black suit on and his long brown hair pushed back.
He's grown a lot more mature and he's taller than I remember seeing him almost seven years ago. He's not the young man I used to fangirl when there was still Satellite Patrol five years back. One thing is for sure, he is still handsome and charming as hell.
"Hello." He greets.
That deep raspy voice of his makes my underwear twists in knots. My heart is beating so hard and pounding even harder. I hope he can't hear it. I feel myself breathing fast too.
What's wrong with me? Relax Miranda.
He doesn’t know.
"Good evening." He greets me again with that dimpled smile just like Ben's.
Well I’ll be damned but Hugo Saintclare is fucking back.
87 T H E A Sebastian committed suicide. He ended his own life with a gun in his head. No one even knew how he had a gun in the first place and no one had any idea he was going to do that. He was supposed to meet Ben and the others tomorrow for a reunion. He was supposed to live a new life after being sentenced in prison for seven years. He was supposed to live in a tropical place and start a new life for himself. He was supposed to live a life filled with dreams now that he is out in prison. Sebastian was supposed to live. I was supposed to forgive him. The autopsy report stated that it happened around twelve midnight which means just a few hours after he left our home. I have never felt so depressed in my entire life that I wasn't even able to tell him a lot of things that I wanted to say. I didnt know what I was exactly feeling, completely lost in my thoughts and emotions after Sebastian's passing. I knew that there was something wrong in his eyes when he talked to me becaus
86T H E A"How have you been?" He asks.Sebastian wore blue, white and light pink plaided top, a pair of faded jeans and a dirty white sneakers. He looked older than the last time I saw him and his hair has gotten longer too. He looked different, but those eyes still frightens me.Those merciless eyes.I couldn't stare at him longer and I had to look away from his gaze. I clear my throat, "I have been well." I answered."I'm really glad that you are." Sebastian tells me."Um, do you want to drink something Sebastian? Tea?" Ben offers.I quickly held his wrist, stopping him from leaving me alone in here and stared into his eyes as I said to him. "Please don't leave me here."Ben stares intently at me before he turns to Sebastian who speaks, "You dont really have to offer me anything."I bite my inner cheek and breathe in some confidence before I faced Sebastian. "What are you doing here?"Sebastian stares at me eagerly."What do you want?" I asked firmly."I came here to see if you ha
85T H E AI couldn't sleep the entire night as I was bothered about Sebastian's release happening in just a few hours.Thoughts were filling and piling inside my head one over the other and I don't know if this was going to let me sleep at all.So I slipped out of the bed where Ben was sleeping soundly and headed out of bedroom to get myself a glass of wine from downstairs. I hate myself when I turn to alcohol every time my thoughts are fogged up and fucked up. I hate when there are questions left unanswered and my solution is alcohol.I hated it.I hated it so much I hate myself too.I finished two glasses of wine and spent almost thirty minutes just sitting on a chair where I tried to drown and sort my troubled thoughts. I finally pulled myself up and headed back to my bedroom only until I saw Xavier heading out of his room, crying. I rushed to his side and wished that he wouldn't smell the stingy scent of alcohol from my breath."Xavier." I cooed. "What happened?""Mommy I had a n
84T H E A“Why didn’t you tell him?”Benedict's question still lingers in my mind.Why didn't I tell Sebastian back in the day?I have been asking myself that same question over and over again for the past couple of years. I used to tell myself that I wasn't ready and I know I wasn't ready. I lied to myself when I said I was ready to confess to him about our child but I was absentmindedly denying the fact that my mind was filled with so many thoughts as soon as I faced Sebastian.When I saw him, I was reminded of how he raped me mercilessly. When I saw him, I was reminded of how dirty of a woman I was. When I saw him, I was reminded of how I didn't want this baby to be born if only it hadn't been for Ben.Ben has always been my rock and my strength after everything that happened to me. All these years, he accepted me no matter what and I have been beyond blessed to have a man like that in my life.That kind of love and care he showed me is going to be something I didn't want to waste
83T H E AI stare at my own reflection in front of the mirror, I gained weight but I look different compared to the old me a few weeks ago. My eyes travelled down to my baby bump and as I turn to my side, I feel more anxiety building in the back of my head. I am not confident enough that I will be a good mother to this baby once it’s out when I know this baby came from a man who I trusted so much but just raped me. My bump is starting to show now and I know I have a lifelong responsibility waiting ahead of me. I just hope I will be responsible enough.I rub my hand over my small tummy then smiled at myself.“You will be fine.” I told my baby.Ben is here for me and for us. He always has. He made everything feel better. He made me better and happier without asking too much in return. He is a very selfless man and I owe him my life. My everything and all that I have left.I breathe out heavily and tucked my hair behind my ears as I stare at myself wearing this white dress and white ba
82B E N E D I C TShe stands by the balcony sliding door, staring at an empty space wearing my shirt and some pajamas. Standing here afar from Thea, looking at her, I can see and I can feel that her mind is full. It’s full of endless thoughts and worries. I wish I could take some from her restless bothered thoughts and I wish I could help her with what she is going through.Thea is strong but I don’t want her to have another breakdown. I hope I can share the pain and confusions she is going through right now. I wish, at least I could make her happy despite of what has happened lately.But I don’t know what to do as well.I am bothered too, restless, anxious, troubled and angry. I still have this growing hate in me and unwillingness to befriend Sebastian.I hate him.I walk towards Thea and wrapped my arms around her. She didn’t budge but still sets her eyes out the window. “There are no stars tonight.” I say.She sighs heavily.“Aren’t you hungry sweetheart?” I ask.She didn’t answer