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Beautifully Unfinished 83
83T H E AI stare at my own reflection in front of the mirror, I gained weight but I look different compared to the old me a few weeks ago. My eyes travelled down to my baby bump and as I turn to my side, I feel more anxiety building in the back of my head. I am not confident enough that I will be a good mother to this baby once it’s out when I know this baby came from a man who I trusted so much but just raped me. My bump is starting to show now and I know I have a lifelong responsibility waiting ahead of me. I just hope I will be responsible enough.I rub my hand over my small tummy then smiled at myself.“You will be fine.” I told my baby.Ben is here for me and for us. He always has. He made everything feel better. He made me better and happier without asking too much in return. He is a very selfless man and I owe him my life. My everything and all that I have left.I breathe out heavily and tucked my hair behind my ears as I stare at myself wearing this white dress and white ba
Beautifully Unfinished 84
84T H E A“Why didn’t you tell him?”Benedict's question still lingers in my mind.Why didn't I tell Sebastian back in the day?I have been asking myself that same question over and over again for the past couple of years. I used to tell myself that I wasn't ready and I know I wasn't ready. I lied to myself when I said I was ready to confess to him about our child but I was absentmindedly denying the fact that my mind was filled with so many thoughts as soon as I faced Sebastian.When I saw him, I was reminded of how he raped me mercilessly. When I saw him, I was reminded of how dirty of a woman I was. When I saw him, I was reminded of how I didn't want this baby to be born if only it hadn't been for Ben.Ben has always been my rock and my strength after everything that happened to me. All these years, he accepted me no matter what and I have been beyond blessed to have a man like that in my life.That kind of love and care he showed me is going to be something I didn't want to waste
Beautifully Unfinished 85
85T H E AI couldn't sleep the entire night as I was bothered about Sebastian's release happening in just a few hours.Thoughts were filling and piling inside my head one over the other and I don't know if this was going to let me sleep at all.So I slipped out of the bed where Ben was sleeping soundly and headed out of bedroom to get myself a glass of wine from downstairs. I hate myself when I turn to alcohol every time my thoughts are fogged up and fucked up. I hate when there are questions left unanswered and my solution is alcohol.I hated it.I hated it so much I hate myself too.I finished two glasses of wine and spent almost thirty minutes just sitting on a chair where I tried to drown and sort my troubled thoughts. I finally pulled myself up and headed back to my bedroom only until I saw Xavier heading out of his room, crying. I rushed to his side and wished that he wouldn't smell the stingy scent of alcohol from my breath."Xavier." I cooed. "What happened?""Mommy I had a n
Beautifully Unfinished 86
86T H E A"How have you been?" He asks.Sebastian wore blue, white and light pink plaided top, a pair of faded jeans and a dirty white sneakers. He looked older than the last time I saw him and his hair has gotten longer too. He looked different, but those eyes still frightens me.Those merciless eyes.I couldn't stare at him longer and I had to look away from his gaze. I clear my throat, "I have been well." I answered."I'm really glad that you are." Sebastian tells me."Um, do you want to drink something Sebastian? Tea?" Ben offers.I quickly held his wrist, stopping him from leaving me alone in here and stared into his eyes as I said to him. "Please don't leave me here."Ben stares intently at me before he turns to Sebastian who speaks, "You dont really have to offer me anything."I bite my inner cheek and breathe in some confidence before I faced Sebastian. "What are you doing here?"Sebastian stares at me eagerly."What do you want?" I asked firmly."I came here to see if you ha
Beautifully Unfinished 87
87 T H E A Sebastian committed suicide. He ended his own life with a gun in his head. No one even knew how he had a gun in the first place and no one had any idea he was going to do that. He was supposed to meet Ben and the others tomorrow for a reunion. He was supposed to live a new life after being sentenced in prison for seven years. He was supposed to live in a tropical place and start a new life for himself. He was supposed to live a life filled with dreams now that he is out in prison. Sebastian was supposed to live. I was supposed to forgive him. The autopsy report stated that it happened around twelve midnight which means just a few hours after he left our home. I have never felt so depressed in my entire life that I wasn't even able to tell him a lot of things that I wanted to say. I didnt know what I was exactly feeling, completely lost in my thoughts and emotions after Sebastian's passing. I knew that there was something wrong in his eyes when he talked to me becaus
Beautifully Unfinished 0
0 "Come on Randy. It's going to be fun!" Nina whines as she tries to pull me off of my hotel bed. "Nina, I really don't want to go to any parties here in Los Angeles.” I answered while groaning in pain. “It's too noisy. It's too loud and crowded. And, I’m sick. Like really really sick." I explained. "First of all, that's what parties are for. Second, we're all going to college after this summer, we need to get ready for more parties to come. And three, you're totally fine!" Nina says sarcastically as she puts on her mascara. I sigh.. My friends were all into parties and I don't even know why in hell we became friends in the first place. In high school, people would always ask why I became friends with them since I don’t even physically belong in their circle. I think it all started in liking the same things but even if people questioned the friendship I had with them throughout in high school, I enjoyed their company. I even heard that they were only keeping me because I looked
Beautifully Unfinished 0.5
0.5I don't remember what kind of drinks I had at the club last night but I'm sure it was hard liquor because my head feels like it's about to explode.I don't remember everything that happened in details last night ‘cause I was still in a state of shock on how the hell did I get back to my hotel room.I finally adjusted my eyesight and take a good look at the white ceiling which was above me. I noticed that there was a huge-ass golden chandelier hanging over me. The scent was unfamiliar too but it smelled like roses and I wonder if the hotel service cleaned my room for me.I groan in satisfaction, God this bed is softer than I remember.I snapped myself out from my thoughts, wait.I don't remember having a huge-ass chandelier above me in my hotel room.I stared at myself and for a second I thought I was in my hotel room but later then I realized that I wasn't. I am in someone’s room, on somebody’s bed and lying down with an actual freaking person next to me..Holy shit!I quickly gra
Beautifully Unfinished 1
1I quickly pulled my hands up to cover my mouth out of extreme shock.No, this cannot be actually happening. There’s absolutely no way.Relax Miranda. Don't scream or else you'll wake him up. I thought.I try to shake my hands in front of me while my heart was racing inside my chest. I pinch my cheeks to see if I was dreaming or if this was one of my wet dreams of Hugo Saintclare in it, but it's not.This is real.This is actually happening to me.This just fucking happened.Holy fuck, Hugo and I had sex.We literally had sex.I tried to rub my eyes to triple check but it's really Hugo sleeping on top of the bed. I'm definitely not hallucinating and definitely not making things up because he is actually right in front of me.I have never imagined that this could happen. I never thought I could be this close to seeing the Hugo Saintclare. What was more shocking is that, I am not screaming or fangirling hardcore because I am still in a state of shock.I can feel my blood rushing throug
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