Chapter 20: Racing Thoughts

Cecilia rested against the side of her kitchen counter, holding onto the cool marble for stability. Her sight became a bit hazy, and a rush of lightheadedness enveloped her. She shut her eyes, inhaling deeply and steadily to calm herself.

For several days, her body had been letting her down, the unending nausea, the exhaustion that felt like a burden, and the throbbing headaches that numbed her perception. It seemed as though her life was collapsing more rapidly than she could maintain control. 

The sound of Ethan's strong knock on her door snapped her out of her racing thoughts. She paused briefly before gradually approaching the door, with every step requiring effort. As she opened it, his intense blue eyes instantly connected with hers, his face clouded with worry. 

"Cecilia," he uttered, entering without invitation, his voice deep and booming like a storm.  "You look pale. What's going on?"

She tried to wave him off, forcing a small smile. "It's nothing, Ethan. I'm just tired."

But Ethan wasn't easily convinced.His keen eyes scanned her, observing the quivering in her hands and the slight glimmer of perspiration on her brow. He shut the door after him and softly took her arm, leading her to the couch. 

"Take a seat," he ordered, his voice allowing no dissent. 

Cecilia exhaled, falling back into the cushions. She despised how effortlessly Ethan could understand her, how his presence appeared to peel away her barriers. She looked away, unwilling to meet his eyes, Her eyes lingered on the coffee table, where unopened letters and neglected knickknacks lay scattered. 

"I'm staying right here until you explain what's happening,"He spoke decisively, arms crossed tightly over his chest."After agreeing to be friends, you've been staying away from me, and now you look like you're about to collapse." "What is the issue?" 

Cecilia's determination faltered. She had hidden her secret for such a long time, yet the burden of it was growing too heavy to bear. And even with his harsh demeanor, Ethan had been a steady figure in her life recently, frequently appearing when she least anticipated it but needed support the most. 

"I'm expecting," she exclaimed, her voice hardly louder than a murmur. 

Ethan became motionless, his gaze tightening as the meaning registered. He moved forward slowly, his face revealing nothing. "Are you expecting?" 

She nodded, tears beginning to fill her eyes.  Ethan. It's... it's for my ex-mate. Andrew."

Ethan's jaw tightened, his wolf stirring just beneath the surface. The thought of another male's child growing inside her sent a surge of protectiveness and jealousy coursing through him, but he shoved it down. This wasn't about him.

"Does he know?" he asked, his voice carefully controlled.

"Yes," Cecilia admitted. "He found out during an argument. However, I emphasized that I do not want him to be included. He has his new partner, Vivian, and they are beginning a family together. "I... I don't require him." 

Ethan observed her for a lengthy moment before taking a seat next to her. "There's something else, right?" 

Cecilia's hands shook while she held onto the edge of her shirt, her knuckles pale. She inhaled unsteadily, her voice trembling as she talked. "I have been identified as having cancer." "It has now been two years." 

The words lingered in the atmosphere, dense and stifling. Ethan froze entirely, his wolf growling within him at the notion of her enduring pain by herself. 

"You've been handling this all by yourself?" he snarled, his tone laced with frustration and pain. "Why didn't you inform anyone?" "Why didn't you let me know?" 

Cecilia's tears spilled over as she finally looked at him. "The only person that knows about this is my friend, Annie. I didn't want anyone's pity. And what could you have done, Ethan? This is my fight. My burden."

Ethan extended his hand toward hers, his touch unexpectedly soft. "You don't have to bear it all by yourself. Especially not now. You're pregnant, Cecilia. You need to think about yourself and the baby."

She shook her head, her voice rising in frustration. "That's the problem! How am I supposed to handle both? How can I fight cancer and carry this child? "What if I'm unable to do it?" 

Ethan's hold strengthened, his gaze aflame with resolve. "We'll work it out. But the first step is talking to your doctor. You need to know exactly what we're dealing with."

Cecilia hesitated, fear clouding her features. "What if the doctor says it's too risky? What if they tell me to choose?"

Ethan felt a sharp ache in his heart at her fragility, at the intense sorrow in her voice. He cradled her face, compelling her to look into his eyes. "Next, we confront it together." There's no need for you to make any choices by yourself, Cecilia. "Not any longer." 

She shut her eyes, leaning into his caress. After years, she experienced a flicker of hope, a feeling that she wasn't completely alone in this struggle. 

***

The following morning, Cecilia found herself in the sterile examination room, her heart racing in her chest. Ethan sat next to her, his presence a calming influence amid the turmoil in her thoughts. She had never envisioned including him in this aspect of her life, but his persistence had given her no alternative. 

Dr. Reynolds entered the room, her kind eyes scanning the pair. "Cecilia, it's good to see you again. And you must be...?"

Ethan nodded, his expression serious. "I'm Ethan, her friend."

Dr. Reynolds smiled faintly before turning her attention back to Cecilia. "I recognize there are certain worries regarding your pregnancy and its potential effects on your treatment plan." 

Cecilia nodded, her voice just above a murmur. " Absolutely. "I want to find out if carrying the baby is feasible while managing my diagnosis." 

The doctor's face became more gentle. "We will conduct some tests to obtain a clearer understanding of your present health and the development of the pregnancy."Every case is unique,We will continue to provide you with the necessary information to help you make the best decision for you and your baby.

Ethan extended his hand to Cecilia, holding it tightly and giving her a sense of comfort."We're ready," he stated, his tone calm. 

Dr. Reynolds acknowledged with a nod. "Let's begin." 

When the tests started, Cecilia experienced a blend of anxiety and solace. For a long time, she had borne this weight in silence. Now, with Ethan next to her, she experienced a glimmer of hope, hope that she could discover a method or way to navigate through this her present condition. 

After several hours, they came back to her apartment, burdened by fatigue.  Cecilia sank onto the couch, her mind racing with so many questions. Ethan positioned himself next to her, his face giving nothing away. 

"Thank you," she spoke gently, shattering the stillness. 

He looked at her, his gaze so intense that it caused her to momentarily hold her breath. "For what reason?" 

"To be present." "For not allowing me to confront this by myself." 

Ethan clenched his jaw, his wolf lurking just below the surface. "You don't need to express your gratitude, Cecilia." This is no longer solely your battle. "It belongs to us." 

She turned her gaze, feeling emotions rising within her. After many years, she experienced a sense of no longer being completely alone. 

As the sun set beneath the horizon, enveloping the room in darkness, Cecilia's phone vibrated on the table. She lifted it, her heart dropping as she glanced at the notification. 

"It's an email from my physician," she stated, her voice quaking. 

Ethan moved in closer, his gaze fixed on hers. "What does it state?" 

Cecilia paused, her tumb lingering above the display. Anything within the message could alter everything. Taking a deep breath, she accessed the email, her gaze sweeping over the text that appeared to merge into one. 

"It's a notification for my upcoming appointment and he also stated that my results are ready," she finally stated, a blend of relief and apprehension evident in her voice.

Ethan placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. "Okay, that's good. So should  I come along with you or do you intend to go their with Annie?."I

"Annie is too busy with the new project she has been handling, so I doubt if she will have the chance to go with me. But, I will be glad if you also accompany me to the hospital."  Cecilia stated.

With a smile on Ethans face, " I will be glad to do that with you", he respponded.

Cecilia smiled back but as the weight of her reality settled over her once more, she couldn't shake off  the lingering question: How much more could she endure?