Ch38

NOVA

The car is silent for approximately five seconds. That short. That's how long it takes for my head to process what Enzo has just said. Journalism? Really?

"It's... It's a thing of the past. It got me fucked up. I'm not going back to it. And don't tell me that I don't fit in with Beth and her friends."

Enzo keeps driving, his eyes solely on the road now. I can practically see the gears in his head turning. I don't like where this conversation is heading. Not at all.

It's headed towards a conversation I'd rather not have with Enzo. But it seems he knows what he's doing, and he doesn't care. It's like he's steering the boat toward that far end.

"You love telling stories about people."

"Enzo..."

"No. That's what you love. You love the media. You live the clicks. You love the thrill and the attention it gives you, don't you?" When I don't answer, he turns to me. "I've seen you at the games reporting. I've seen the way you light up when stuff happens. I don't know why you quit."

I stare at him. "You literally hate me because I was too stupid and obsessed with journalism. I lost my best friend because of it. Mr. Lawson won't even look at me and it's all because of some stupid hobby."

"You said you wanted to be a..."

"That was before okay? That was before I realized that I couldn't do that without hurting the ones that I love. My brother is into hockey and you are as well. One of these days I'll find something beneficial to me, and I'd destroy people I love because of it!"

"I don't hate you, Nova."

I shut my eyes. "You keep saying that."

"I don't."

"You do. Ever since the stuff happened. You hate me. Noah hates me."

"I don't hate you. I could never hate you." He says, making a turn for the road that leads to his house. He gives me a long glance. "I could never hate you."

"But..."

"You're Noah's sister. You made a mistake."

I feel a lump rising in my throat. "That's not what you said." I blink. "That's not what Noah said. That's not what it looked like when you and my brother came to my aunt's place."

"There was a lot of emotions, Nova. I try to hate you but I can't. And it's not just because you're Noah's sister..."

The engine cuts out, plunging the car into silence. Enzo doesn't reach for the door handle. Instead, he turns in his seat, resting his arm along the console, and looks right at me.

I blink, tearing my gaze away from him. What's happening? Why did he drive us to his place instead of mine? And why is he looking at me like that?

"It’s because... God, Nova," he starts, his voice dropping. "Because I’ve been trying to bury this for years."

"Bury what?" I mutter, crossing my arms defensively. "What are you even talking about, Enzo?"

"I’m talking about the fact that I’ve had feelings for you," he says, holding my gaze. "Actual, gut-wrenching, distracting-as-hell feelings for you, for as long as I can remember."

I freeze. The world outside the windshield stops spinning. I just stare at him, my mouth slightly parted. Is he out of his mind? Has a hockey puck hit his head one too many times this season? Is this some sick, twisted joke?

Yet, even as my brain screams at me that he has to be insane, a humiliating part of me can't completely rule it out. I think back to all those times he watched me a little too closely across at home.

"Are you..." I swallow hard. "Are you concussed? Did you take a hard check into the boards today because that is a stupid joke."

"I’m dead serious, Nova," he says, leaning in closer. "Do you have any idea how insane it drove me watching you throw yourself into reporting, worrying about people who didn't give a damn about you? Do you know what it did to me seeing the scandal and everything?"

"You acted like you hated me,"

"I didn't hate you. I couldn't say anything because Noah is my brother, my best friend, and the unwritten rule is you don't cross that line. But I’ve had these feelings for you forever, Nova. Literally forever."

My chest heave. My palms are sweating. The silence in the car is deafening. My voice comes out in a squeak.

"You... you have feelings for me?"

Enzo holds my gaze for a while. Then, the corner of his mouth twitches. A second later, his head tilts back and he bursts out laughing... It's loud, booming, and it's obnoxious. And it shatters the heaviness into a million pieces.

I blink. "What? What is so funny?"

Enzo wipes a tear from the corner of his eye, still chuckling as he shakes his head. "No... oh, man... no, I don't!"

"What do you mean, no?" I demand, my eyebrows pulling together.

Grinning wider than I’ve ever seen him grin, Enzo leans back against his seat. "You really thought it was true? Oh, God, Nova, your face right now... priceless. Absolute gold. I should have recorded that."

The blood rushes violently to my cheeks, burning hot enough to singed my skin. My jaw drops open, and my brain short-circuits.

"I... you... wait, you just said... that was a complete... are you actually out of your mind?!" I stammer, my voice pitching upward. "You lied? You just made all of that up?!"

"Come on, you walked right into it!" Enzo laughs harder, doubling over. "The shock in your eyes, I swear I could frame it and put it on my wall."

My hands curl into tight fists in my lap, and I glare at him.

"Fuck you, Enzo."

Enzo smirks, shifting the car back into park as he finally catches his breath, looking pleased with himself.

"You wish, Nova," he teases, gazing down at me. "You totally wish."