Chapter Four: The night stand

The hotel bar was called Inferno, which felt appropriate for a woman about to make the worst decision of her life.

Red light paid with music was that pulsing electronic shit that rich people pretended to enjoy, loud enough to drown out your own thoughts. I was grateful for that.

The smell of perfume and testosterone made my stomach turn, but I kept walking because turning around now would mean going back to that hotel room alone, and alone meant thinking about tomorrow, and thinking about tomorrow meant…

I saw him.

Levi sat at the bar with his jacket slung over the stool beside him like he was saving it for someone. For me? The thought came unbidden and unwanted. His white shirt was rolled to his elbows, I could see the muscle and tendon shift in his forearms as he lifted his drink, set it down, lifted it again without drinking.

He was still wearing his watch. I noticed because I was looking for reasons not to do this.

His shoulders were up near his ears. Had he been sitting there this whole time? Waiting? The thought sent something warm through my chest.

Then he sensed me, or heard me, or maybe just gave up on the drink that clearly wasn’t helping and his head came up.

For a second, I saw surprise. Real surprise, like he’d convinced himself I wouldn’t come.

Then his eyes traveled down.

And I felt it. It felt like standing too close to something electric. The sensation started at my throat and moved down, and I knew exactly where he was looking because my body responded a half-second before my brain caught up. My throat. My collarbones where the dress left them bare. My nipples tightened under his gaze and I hated that I couldn’t control it, hated that my body was betraying me again, after everything, after Julian, after…

When his eyes met mine again, I saw hunger there. Desire that made my toes curl. I have never been desired.

I walked toward him, my heels clicking against the floor, hyperaware of how the dress moved with each step. How every eye in the bar followed me. How Levi’s attention never wavered.

He stood as I approached, straightening to his full height. I was five-seven and wearing four-inch heels, and I still had to tilt my head back to meet his eyes.

“You came.”

His voice was rougher than before.

“I changed my mind.”

His mouth curved into a slow smile that made my stomach flip. “I’m very glad you did.”

He gestured to the empty stool beside him. I slid onto it, and the movement made my dress ride up. I tugged at the hem, suddenly self-conscious, but his hand caught mine.

“Don’t. You look incredible.”

Heat flooded my face and my whole body.

He released my wrist slowly, his fingers dragging across my skin in a way that felt deliberate. Then he settled back onto his stool, angling his body toward mine.

Close. So close our knees almost touched.

“What are you drinking?”

“Anything strong.”

He signaled the bartender without looking away from me. “Whiskey. Neat. Two.”

The drinks arrived. I threw mine back without tasting it, needing the burn.

Levi watched me over the rim of his glass, his eyes tracking the movement of my throat as I swallowed. When I set the empty glass down, his gaze dropped to my mouth and stayed there.

“Rough day?”

A laugh bubbled up. “You could say that.”

“Want to talk about it?”

“God, no. I want to forget about it.”

The bartender refilled my glass. I reached for it, but Levi’s hand closed around my wrist.

This time, his thumb stroked across my pulse point. Back and forth.

“Slow down. You’ll regret it in the morning.”

“I’m going to regret everything in the morning anyway.” I pulled free, reluctantly, and took a sip this time. Slower. “Might as well enjoy tonight.”

He studied me for a long moment. Then, instead of pity or judgment, he smiled. A real smile that transformed his entire face. Devastating.

“Fair enough.” He raised his glass. “To forgetting.”

I clinked mine against his. “To forgetting.”

We drank.

He set his glass down, and suddenly his whole demeanor shifted. The intensity dimmed just enough to let me breathe. His smile turned playful.

“So. Are you going to tell me why you ran away from me in the elevator?”

I choked on my whiskey. “Excuse me?”

“The elevator. You practically bolted. Was it something I said? My devastating good looks? My sparkling personality?”

Despite everything, I laughed. “Your humility, actually. It was overwhelming.”

“Ah. I get that a lot. Women find my modesty intimidating.”

“Is that what we’re calling it?”

“Among other things.” His knee brushed against mine. The contact sent heat shooting up my thigh. “Though I prefer ‘charmingly self-aware.’”

“Charmingly delusional, maybe.”

“Ouch.” But he was grinning now, and the sight did terrible things to my self-control. “And here I thought paying for your hotel room would earn me some goodwill.”

“Oh, that.” I turned on my stool to face him fully, and the movement brought us even closer. Our knees were touching now. I could feel the heat of him through the thin fabric of my dress. “Thank you. Really. You didn’t have to do that.”

“I wanted to.” His expression softened. “You looked like you needed someone in your corner.”

The honesty in his voice cracked something open inside me.

“I did. I do.”

“Then let me be that person.” His hand moved, slowly, giving me time to stop him, until it rested on my knee. “Even if it’s just for tonight.”

The weight of his palm against my bare skin made my breath catch. His hand was warm, large enough to span from my knee halfway up my thigh. He didn’t move it higher. Didn’t squeeze or caress. Just rested it there, a brand burning through my skin. I wanted him to move higher.

“Tell me something real. Something about you.” I said, clearing my throat to distract me from the need building up in my core.

His thumb moved. Just barely. A small circle against the inside of my knee that made my toes curl in my heels.

“I have a brother. And I’ve spent my entire life in his shadow.”

The rawness in his voice made my chest ache.

His hand slid higher. Just an inch. Maybe two. His fingers splayed across my thigh, thumb still drawing those maddening circles.

“I’m tired of being invisible.”

“You’re not invisible. Not to me.” I whispered back, our faces barely inches away.

“No?” He asked, his gaze dropping to my lips, darkening with need.

“No.”

We stared at each other. The music pulsed around us. People laughed and danced. But all I could see was him. All I could feel was the heat of his hand on my skin.

“Your turn. Tell me something real. I want to know something about the girl who wouldn’t tell me her name.”

I should have stopped him. Should have moved his hand.

Instead, I leaned closer.

“I’m getting married tomorrow. To someone I’ve never met. Someone I don’t want.”

His hand stilled. His jaw worked. “Then don’t marry him.”

“It’s not that simple. If I don’t…” I stopped. Swallowed hard. “The alternative is worse.”

Something dangerous flashed in his eyes. His hand slid higher, possessive now, his fingers spanning across my upper thigh, his thumb grazing dangerously close to where my dress ended.

“Does he know? This man you’re marrying. Does he know you don’t want this?”

“I don’t think he cares.”

“Then he’s a fool.”

His hand moved higher still. Not quite indecent, but close. Close that I ached for him to touch me. His fingers burned against my skin. I could feel the controlled strength in them.

“Because I look at you and I see someone extraordinary. Someone fierce and brave and beautiful I can’t think straight.”

My heart was hammering. My whole body felt like it was on fire. His hand on my thigh, his mouth so close, the heat in his eyes…

“Levi…”

“I desire you.” The words came out rough. His fingers flexed against my thigh, pressing in. “I’ve wanted you since I saw you in that lobby. Wanted to know what you taste like. What sounds you make. How you’d feel…”

He stopped himself. His jaw clenched. His eyes closed briefly, like he was fighting for control.

When he opened them again, they were black with want.

“I know this is fast. I know you don’t know me. But I need you to understand…” His hand slid up another inch, his fingers now fully under my dress, skimming the lace edge of my panties. “I don’t pity you. I don’t want to save you. I just want you. All of you. Even if it’s just for tonight.”

I couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t think. All I could do was feel, his hand on my thigh, his eyes burning into mine, the ache between my legs that was becoming unbearable.

I’ve been good my whole life. Been perfect. Been everything everyone else needed me to be.

And where had that gotten me?

“Okay.” I said before I could think it through.

His eyes flared. “Okay?”

“Yes.” My voice was shaking. My whole body was shaking. “Just for tonight. Make me feel like a woman.”

He stood in one fluid movement, his hand never leaving my thigh. He was so close now I could feel the heat radiating off him, could see the rapid rise and fall of his chest.

“Come with me.”

It wasn’t a question.

It was a promise.

I took his offered hand.

And everything changed.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​