Chapter 94

As I arrived home, I messaged Logan asking if he could talk. Within minutes he was phoning me. I explained the situation and the way everyone was talking. We spent about an hour on the phone talking about it before I felt exhausted. I weighed up all the options that evening. If I volunteered, I would be in control and of course, at the end of the day, it was just a job. Surely, I could get another job, but my worry was, would it be one I loved as much as this one?

Over the next few days, the team was quieter than normal. I went around in my head and couldn’t make a decision. Our boss was checking in a lot more than normal with us. The week seemed to fly by. By the close of play Friday, everyone was very quiet, and no one had volunteered. I decided against volunteering. I needed to know how much I was valued at work compared to the team and the only way was by letting the business decide. It seemed this was the same line of thinking everyone else had settled against.

The weekend arrived and along with it came Logan. He could tell I was distracted, and that my head was worrying about work. The next few weeks were going to be tough. On the off-chance things did not go my way, Logan offered to help with my CV. We spent Saturday afternoon updating my CV and ensuring all my skills and hard work were covered on there, along with my business course.

He tried his best to keep my mind occupied with movies, walks and shopping but I was just not very good company. I couldn’t help but wonder if my emergency leave would go against me in my assessment. I became more distant and distracted as the weekend went on. I apologised to Logan, but he didn’t mind. As Sunday came to a close, Logan got back onto the road.

Once he was gone, Abigail came round. We spent a few hours talking everything over. She had the same line of thinking I had gone over several times during the week.

“Maybe it’s the universes way of telling you to go all in with Logan?”

As much as I wanted to agree with her, I couldn’t help but think about how much my work was like my second home. As she headed home a message popped up on my phone from Logan.

‘Hey babe, I'm home safe and sound.’

‘I’m about to email you your CV, I completely forgot to do it yesterday.’

‘Thank you.’

‘Try not to worry too much, one way or another I have a feeling everything will be alright.’

‘Goodnight.’

I smiled and crawled into bed. Sleep was restless as stress and anxiety won out. The next few days we were all nervous. It was very clear that work did not want to mess around making the decision. We were advised that a decision would be made within the next few weeks.