3: I’m Done

JADE

“Thank you. Thank you for coming.”

I tried to feign a smile, to act like the deep hole in my heart wasn't eating at me.

Not many people attended the funeral. Most of them were distant relatives I didn't even know existed. My feet hurt where I stood and I was very sure I have run out of tears.

My stomach growled, as I watched the old men and women move around the house, stuffing their faces with food.

If I didn't know any better, I would think that it was a black themed birthday party because of the lack of sadness in the air.

It had been very hard to make the food they were munching away on.

My grandmother was very traditional, even down to the things she ate. Since I had Irish ancestry, I had to find out how to make foods I didn't even know were edible.

With little to no help from anyone, I had successfully managed to make it edible for these people to come and eat and catch up on old times.

“Our deepest condolences. We're sorry for your loss.” A woman patted me on the shoulder.

She said she was a distant relative. She didn't look like she was sorry for me though.

I wanted to scream, I wanted to shout at all of them and tell them to get out because they didn't deserve to be here, at my grandmother's last moment.

She had told me that this would happen. My grandmother had always been a great judge of character.

“People are animals. You can never truly know a person's next move even if you think you know the person very well.”

The day she had told me that, I remember Atlas was the first person that came to mind. It was during my first year of marriage and emotions were running high.

I was new to marriage, new to having a husband and new to the fact that my husband hated me.

Even in marriage, I had been all alone but she had helped me scale through. She'd taught me how to be patient with him.

“You can't force him to love you right away. He was also forced into this marriage the same way you were. Give it time, love always works wonders. And you are wonderful. He would be a fool not to fall madly in love within months.” She playfully winked. Or attempted to is the right word. “How do you think your grandfather married me?”

My grandparents' marriage has been a contract marriage. Her father, being the Alpha of the pack, arranged for her to be married to my grandfather, the son of the Lycan King. Although she didn't want to, she respected her father a lot and went ahead with it.

She always talked about how they never spoke to each other in their first month of marriage. It's because of her I stayed in this marriage for this long.

On the days when things got so tough, she'd take me into the field and tell me stories of her life. She was the strongest person I knew and I looked up to her.

After my mother's death, I had fallen into a bottomless abyss and it was my grandmother who pulled me out of it before I was swallowed whole. She put her grief aside and helped me get through it.

I placed her favorite food items in her casket and closed it. It was a tradition in my family to put the deceased food items inside the casket and close it up. It was believed that when they were buried, they'd plant the food and start up a new life in the afterlife.

I didn't know who came up with such a thought but right now, it was this singular act of giving my grandma food that was causing tears to gather in my eyes.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and a sense of relief washed over me. I assumed it was Atlas.

A heavy feeling filled my chest, making my shoulders feel heavy. I wanted to hug him and cry my eyes out because I hated myself right now.

“Than-”

Andrew stared at me with wide eyes, waiting for what I was about to say. If he saw my disappointment, he didn't say anything.

The fact that it wasn't Atlas made me more sad and I couldn't help the tears that rained down my face. Where was Atlas? Why wasn't he ever there when I needed him?

I cried on Andrew's shoulders like that for a while and almost everyone had left when I pulled myself together. Slowly, I stood to my feet, making my way to the men that had come to take away her body.

She had asked to be cremated and I was going to honor that wish. My mother had been cremated as well and I still had her ashes.

“Please, take good care of her.”

As they took her away, the maids came in and tidied up the room. I was so glad that all this was over and I just wanted to return to my room to get some sleep and forget my sad life.

“Hey! What's going on?” Atlas ran into the room as if he was being chased.

I made eye contact with him and continued what I was doing, taking down the picture of my grandma that hung from the wall.

There was no need for him now. It was better when he had not come. At least, I knew he didn't care about me. I didn’t want him here with feigning concern.

“Jade, I'm really sorry.”

“Okay." That was all I said. There was nothing to say.

“Jade.” He called but I didn’t say anything.

After he called me again three more times. He snapped.

“What exactly do you want from me? I had something to do that I couldn't get away from but I'm here now.”

I knew the important thing he had to do, Annie. I'm very sure he had been with Annie and he had let that little witch keep him away until she was sure the funeral was over.

No one was expecting the words that came out of my mouth next. Not even me.

“I want a divorce.”