Do You Even Love Me At All?

Chapter Three

My eyes widened fixed on Kade. Tears threatened to fall but I swallowed them back, I folded my arms folding each grain of anger back inside. 

“Have you ever cared about my feelings at all?”

My voice cracked, alongside my heart betraying the strength I tried to hold in my folded hands.

He looked up from his glass, his expression painting his face with a bitter frown. As if my voice was a rejection he never expected.

“Do you even love me at all?”

Even if it's just for pretense, I won't mind! I fired at him.

My voice pierced my own ears, shaking steadily with my body, Kade and Lisa's eyes focused on me full with shock. The shock that surprised me too.

Kade’s eyes grew larger, each one begging for freedom an escape, as if my presence was the only target audience in sight. 

Suddenly, Lisa's hand rose to shift a hair strand, instead of falling back to where it belonged. It lingered in the midair confused. Her gaze caught the signal and obeyed, her gaze collapsing to the floor, the only place that offered her a temporary escape.

My lips spread and parted gently, a reassurance that promised Kade should be finally mine if I release the secret of my pregnancy. 

Kade, can you believe I'm… my voice trailed off , questioning if I should continue or not. My lips trembled, doubting what would be Kade's reaction.

“Kade, can you show me the rest room?”

 Lisa's question cut in. A hint of challenge clearly showed in her tone. Her voice was clear and commanding.

. 

The way Kade looked at Lisa triggers an image of the negligence of what the baby might have to face. So I swallowed the lump in my throat, swallowing the news of the pregnancy. 

Lisa stood without hesitation, which way? Her voice, soft and charming, reminding me of the attention I can never get from Kade.

Kade's smile grew taller as he rose, his height followed to show Lisa the way to the rest room, leaving me and my emotions alone, as they both followed the exit,

I found my voice back , this time determined to tell him for real as I walked to the restroom.

“Kade I … my eyes fixed on the continuous scene of affection between Kade and Lisa. I stood frozen this time unable to digest the show. 

“Why...why are you doing this to me? I demanded with my voice trembling.”

Kade shrugged, finally speaking up.

“ Relax Avia”

His words do the opposite, making me restless.

“I'm fixing what you complicated”

Why? Complicated? I stood confused.

“This is just part of the therapy for relieving her trauma. The one you complicated”

You poured water on Lisa and she has been shaking since, especially when she sees water. 

He tightened his arm around her and pulled her closer in front of me.

“The only thing that calms her is this and I brought her in because of this. His hand lingered hugging her.”

My anger wanted to scream but my silence betrayed me, I stood helpless, watching the scene. He escorted Lisa back and I followed closely.

My legs brushed against someone and I stopped.

Lisa stumbled, before I could move Kade's hand caught her instantly and they both fell to the ground.

“Avia trapped me! she cried out, begging for kade's reaction.”

Kade turned instantly, his face dark, spiced with anger.

“Apologize to Lisa right now or I'll end this marriage this minute”

“I lifted my hand, pointing to my legs, trying to explain. Why would I push her? I didn't, believe me, Kade. And won't apologize for something I didn't do.”

The silence that followed after my word lingered on and still I remained still, unbothered, standing my ground while maintaining eye contact with Kade.

I won't! I repeated.

My words were firm and soft, slicing the awkward silence at once. Lisa's jaw dropped, staring bluntly at me.

Silence thickened, but I didn’t move. For the first time in years, I looked Kade straight in the eye.

His eyes darkened, burning with rage. He maintained his composure, with a posture that's impossible to ignore as my eyes followed him to the drawer nearby, collecting the paper and the paper went flying to my side.

The papers went flying, slowly it dropped down, kissing my feet.

 For some time, I only stare at the papers, taking my time to calm my nerves before breaking down as usual.

The reality sank in and I chose to embrace it this time, like always I could just bend and pick them up and promise Kade I'll improve.

 I could do anything to be his wife, the desperate one whose hope only lies the possibility of giving him an heir.

But my hands refused to listen to my emotions, instead of bending down to pick the paper and begging him.

My hands stayed glued to my side listening to the command of my brain, I lifted my gaze now meeting kade's irritated gaze.

A loud laugh from Emily Kade's cousin swallowed the silence, accompanied by pears bitterly smirking as they walked in.

Bravo, Kade, bravo this is impressive, I've been waiting for a moment like this since eternity and you just grant me the perfect scene. Now you can be with Lisa, the one who truly deserves you, not her.

Pears, kade's mother nodded, folding her arms in agreement.

Let Lisa give this family the heir it deserves, she's perfect beside you and I'm not getting younger Kade. Divorce her before it's too late.

Their words simply dug my grave instantly, collecting my crushed soul into the pit but instead of falling, I rose __ reluctantly yet firmly.

If you're so hungry for divorce Kade, then I'll serve you hurt, my lips curved into a blunt smile. 

Fine, I'll prefer it as cold as you he spat. At las

t we're done. 

The words pulled the last grip in me, yet for the first time I didn't fall — I died.