GOING BACK HOME

Ciara

Out in the dark night; with my heavy suitcase in hand, I looked around thinking of where I should spend the night. 

“Should I go to the sauna?” I muttered under my breathe, bringing out my phone to check the time, “It’s too late. Most of the sauna’s would have been closed by now. What do I do? My battery almost down”

Just then my phone rang; Tina flashed across the screen. Tina is a very good friend of mine. She’s been around since Ryan and I got married so she was more like a family friend.

She was and still is the only confidant I’ve had since I moved away from home, work and everything. 

I cleared my throat before answering her call, “Tina, what’s the ma—”

“Cut the crap and tell me where you are”

“What do you me-“

“Your husband called me so hurry up and tell me where you are”

I stomped my feet heavily on the ground. Why had Ryan called Tina? The least I wanted to do right now was thread on my friend’s space. 

But now given as I wasn’t left with much of a choice; because I knew Tina wasn’t going to drop it, I told her where I was and waited patiently for her car to pull up. 

Sitting by the bench at the bustop, I tried not to think about it, I really did but my mind kept on going back to Anne and Ryan at the house, those pictures on her phone. 

That only goes without saying that they’d been together since we’d gotten married or maybe way before..there was no telling anything anymore. 

I was just angry right now, way beyond words that I allowed myself to be used that way and by such a guy. 

Tina’s red sports car came to view as it’s headlights shined my way. Getting up from the bench, I brought my suitcase along with me to the front waving at her car. 

She pulled up Infront of me, helped me get my suitcase into the boot and drove off. 

“Sorry my husband—” I cursed softly. When would I outgrow this?. I corrected myself immediately, “Sorry Ryan asked you to come get me” 

“Did you two fight?”

“Why would you think so? Did he say anything?”

“He doesn’t need to, Ciara. I can read you as clear as water. You went from ‘My husband’ to ‘Ryan’ in split seconds”

Heaving a heavy sigh, I rest my head backwards, “It’s just something minor”

“So minor that you won’t stay at home? Come on homegirl, tell me all about it”

“Maybe another time. You look browbeat and honestly, I just want to sleep tonight if that’s fine with you. It’s been a rough day”

“Sure, you deserve rest. That’s right, I just remembered today is your one year anniversary; can I at least congratulate you on that?”

“No” I say harshly and abruptly that I hadn’t given it enough thought that my words would hurt Tina. 

Rubbing my hands against my forehead; I moaned with frustration, “Dear god, Tina I didn’t mean for it to come out the way it sounded. It’s just that…” I decided it was best to tell her, “Ryan and I are getting a divorce and right now I just don’t want to think or talk about anything, okay?”

Tina looked like she’d just heard the most shocking news ever but still did her best to mask it, “Okay home girl, understood”

“Thank you” I’d say before slowly drifting off to the sleep for the rest of the ride. 

When we arrived at Tina’s; she’d woken me up, “Ciara, we’re here. Wake up”

Clearing my eyes; I looked around me, “Oh”

Unfastening my seatbelt, I climbed down from the car as I made my way towards the booth. 

Tina quickly climbed down as she rushed over to meet me, “What are you doing?”

“I want to take my luggage”

“You should go in, wash up, eat and sleep. It’s been a long day for you. I’ll take care of your luggage”

“But..”

“No ‘But’s’ Ciara. And stop feeling like you are imposing on me because you and I both know you would have done the same thing for me if I was the one in the state you are in right now”

“I can’t do much for you but the little I can, don’t try to stop me from doing it” Tina concluded as I try my best to suppress the urge to cry because I was overwhelmed; overwhelmed by the fact that I had a friend like her. 

Rather than sobbing; I embraced her ever so tightly, “Sorry and thank you”

She patted my back, “Let’s stop being sorry from today. Hurry up and go inside already. You must be starving”

“Okay”

“I already informed the help about your staying. She’ll show you to your room. Hurry up and go now, I’ll join you soon”

“Come up soon”

“Sure” Tina responded as I turned my back at her and made my way towards her house. 

Tina’s house wasn’t a magnanimous mansion but it was cozy. It was a two story building which was white on the inside. 

There were flower beds on either side of the lawn that housed varieties of flowers. 

On walking in, I was nearly blinded with brightness coupled with the white interior of the house and the golden chandelier dangling from the center of the roof. 

“This way ma’am” A voice said breaking my focu. It was then I realized that someone had come to me. 

I followed the help as she led me to the second floor and the first door on the right, “This is it”

“Thank you” As I watched the maid turn away, I made my way into the room. 

The interior was pink and it had just one bed. I stripped out of my clothes making my way to the bathroom to shower. 

As I sinked down onto the bathtub, memories of when I’d be bathing and he’d be singing songs for me from outside the door, telling me random jokes or how his day was at the office. 

I let out a small smile; hurt, “Or maybe while I thought he was telling me, he was busy telling HER”

I raised my hands to fan my eyes; trying to hold back my tears, “Why am I crying? He’s the one at fault so why am I…”

Tears took over my voice as I let my body give into my pain, there and then at the bathtub; hugging my knees close to my chin. 

When I’d cried to my heart’s content, I stepped out of the bathroom, threw on clean pair clothes and moved to the dinning table; where I knew Tina would be waiting for me. 

As I ate, I could feel Tina’s questioning eyes on me. It was as if she didn’t want to intrude but needed answers. 

“Just ask it” I threw out; my mouth filled with meatloaf. 

“What do you plan to do? After the divorce, I mean”

I heaved a heavy sigh, “I’ve sure missed working a lot, you know. I intend to go back to everything I gave up because of Ryan”

“So..you’ll be going back home?”

I nod my head, “Yes, I’ll be going back home”

Home…funny how I haven’t thought about it for a year now.