로그인I hadn't slept properly in days.At first, I thought it was because of the hearing. Then I thought maybe it was because Kai and I were still trying to settle into the new apartment, because the unfamiliar silence at night felt wrong after spending so long in Brandon's house, where there was always movement somewhere. Victor coughing in the study. Brandon walking downstairs for water at midnight. Kai sneaking into my bed after a nightmare. Even Caleb dropping by unannounced and arguing with Brandon over something stupid. The silence here felt too complete. Too careful. Like the apartment itself was afraid to breathe too loudly.But by the seventh day, I realized sleep wasn't avoiding me because of the hearing.It was because I was scared.Scared of court.Scared of Dean.Scared of losing Kai.And maybe, if I was being honest with myself, scared that I'd ruined the only good thing that had happened to me in years when I'd pushed Brandon away.The thought alone made my chest tighten, so
I stood outside Joan’s apartment for longer than I should have after she whispered yes.The word kept replaying in my head even after the door shut softly in front of me. It hadn’t sounded firm. It hadn’t sounded certain either. If anything, it sounded like she’d forced herself to say it because she thought it was the answer she was supposed to give. But it was still a yes. She’d looked away when she said it too, like she couldn’t bear to watch my reaction, and somehow that made the tight feeling in my chest worse.For a second, I genuinely considered knocking again.I almost did it.Almost told her that I wasn’t asking because I wanted reassurance for my ego or because I couldn’t take rejection. I’d asked because I needed to know whether she actually wanted me gone or if she was simply doing what she always did whenever she got hurt: pushing everyone away before they could disappoint her further.But in the end, I stayed where I was.Then I left.The hallway outside her apartment was
~~Brandon's POV~~The silence in the house felt wrong.I realized it the second I opened my eyes.For a few disoriented moments, I lay there staring at the ceiling, waiting for the familiar sounds that had somehow become part of my routine without me noticing. Kai’s small feet pounding through the hallway. Joan downstairs making coffee before work because apparently functioning without caffeine was impossible for her. The soft hum of the television because Kai somehow always woke up before everyone else and immediately wanted cartoons. Even the occasional sound of Joan muttering under her breath when she realized he’d made a mess somewhere.Nothing came.The house stayed quiet.Too quiet.And that was when it hit me again.They were gone.I scrubbed a hand over my face and sat up slowly, exhaling hard through my nose as the emptiness settled heavier in my chest than it had the night before. I’d spent so long getting used to sharing my space with them that the sudden absence of them fe
~~Joan~~Sleep avoided me that night.Every time I closed my eyes, I either saw Victor admitting he'd been the one sending me anonymous messages during my marriage, or Brandon standing in the kitchen quietly telling me he was scared I'd pull away from him if I found out he'd known. The worst part was that neither memory made me as angry as they should have. Hurt, yes. Betrayed, definitely. But anger required distance, and somehow both men had rooted themselves too deeply into my life for me to stay properly angry at either of them.Especially Brandon.Which was exactly the problem.I stared at the ceiling from my spot on the bed while Kai slept beside me, starfished across the mattress with one sock half hanging off his foot and his stuffed dinosaur tucked beneath his chin. Soft morning light had started leaking into the room already, painting pale gold across the walls, and I realized I'd spent most of the night thinking.Thinking about Brandon.Thinking about how easily he'd become
The house felt different after Joan got upset with me.I noticed it immediately.Not because she yelled or slammed doors or made some dramatic scene out of it. Honestly, I thought I would've preferred that. At least then I'd know where I stood with her. Instead, she became quiet in a way that unsettled me deeply. She moved around my house politely, spoke when necessary, answered questions when asked, but every interaction felt measured, like she was carefully deciding how much of herself she was willing to give me now.And the answer seemed to be: not much.Kai had fallen asleep almost an hour ago after forcing me to listen to an extremely serious explanation about which dinosaurs would survive a volcano eruption and which wouldn't. I'd tucked him into bed while Joan stayed downstairs claiming she wanted tea, though I had a feeling she mostly just wanted distance from me.Now I stood by the kitchen entrance watching her quietly.She sat at the island wearing one of the oversized sweat
By late morning, the house had become too quiet.Not peaceful quiet.Heavy quiet.The kind that sat on my chest and made breathing feel like work.Victor had left for a doctor's appointment over an hour ago after asking me twice if I was sure I didn't want to come with him, and both times I'd told him no. Kai was in the living room building what looked like a dinosaur city with blocks and toy cars while some cartoon played softly in the background, and Brandon had stepped out earlier after receiving a call from work. That left me alone with my thoughts, which was honestly beginning to feel like the worst possible company.The lawyer meeting from yesterday still replayed in my head in fragments.Custody.Household assessment.Dean came prepared.Every time I thought about it too long, something cold settled inside my stomach.I tried distracting myself with work emails, but my attention span barely lasted three minutes before my mind wandered somewhere ugly again. Then I tried cleaning
I hesitated to answer, looking at Brandon. He also looked unsure. Victor had told us what we needed to know, yes, but because he was who he was, I was certain he'd left out some things he hadn't wanted us to know. The doctor looked between us, then chuckled lightly. "I'll take it he didn't?"What
~~Joan~~The drive home felt longer than usual.Kai sat quietly in the backseat, his small hands folded around the straps of his backpack. Normally, he would have been talking—about school, about whatever game he’d played during recess, about the newest drawing or papercraft he’d made.Today, he wa
For a full second, my brain simply stopped working.My eyes landed somewhere around Brandon’s collarbone before instinct forced them upward again. His hair looked slightly damp, like he’d just showered, and there was a faint flush across his shoulders.Heat rushed to my face."I—" I cleared my thro
"There's no and. I only met them once, I didn't even know they existed until that day, and it was at one's burial." He let out a low whistle. "That's fucking messed up, man.""I know."I picked up my pen and tapped it lightly against the page."I was actually thinking about reaching out to my aunt







