Chapter 2

~Grace~

Almost drunk, I just knock the door of my condo and leaned on the wall, waiting for someone to open it for me. I don't have any strength left on me, it was all gone, that's why I drove home after having a few drinks near the convenient store. It is good that I got home safe and didn't ended in an accident on my way knowing I did fled my car and race with other cars ahead. 

After my third times of knocking, the door clicked as soon as the woman behind showed infront of me. “Hi, you must be so lazy to even open the door yourself,” she spoke with an accent in her voice.

I fakely smiled and tapped her shoulder. I walked passed to her and remove my heels. “I'm drained. Can you hand me a glass of water?” I pleaded to my friend, Seffie.

“Sure, wait a moment dear.” She went in the kitchen and vanish on my sight.

I smiled wryly, thankful that Seffie is with me. I might lost control of things without her beside me. I groaned silently when I felt a slight pain in my head. My legs felt weak that I melt on my place. My head hurts so bad. My vision keeps on bluring slowly. I'm even sweating bullets and my nerves tightened as I'm feeling not okay. I don't know what's happening on me at this time. I felt being half unconscious. 

“Water,” I breathlessly said. So low that no one can hear. Only those whispering winds can understand. 

“Oh my gosh!” Someone just screamed.

I heard something crushed near but I can't turn my head to look at it. I don't have the control on my body. I felt being numb. As much as I want to check if Seffie okay, my body don't allow me to do.

Suddenly, Seffie popped infront holding a glass of water, panting. Like a hungry animal, I drink harshly as Seffie guided it on my mouth. My throat got dried upon being unconditional for a while.

Later, as my body weakened and my head tired, I collapsed infront of her. My vision get blurry and I was eaten by darkness. The other day, I woke up with heavy feeling, numb chest and head ache, tears pooled my eyes as I put my head between my knees and sobs.

That's what I only did for the past hours and Seffie always beside me. I'm just thankful she don't asks things to me. Apparently, when I feel good another morning, she went to me as if I have sin to explain. 

“What happened?” She asked directly.

I tugged her beside me and hugged her tightly. Tears troll down her cheeks and recall what she had saw to me last time. She got scared. Even myself, I'm scared too, not through this but for all of the things I'm facing. It was so hard for me to accept the defeat I'm feeling inside my heart.  

I looked around the condo. This was Bill's gift to me 2 years ago. I still remember how I'm blessed to have a man so good beside me. But now, what I only think, I wasn't really blessed. I'm suck for believing all his good lies. His good at it that a mere woman like me, would gonna buy it alone. 

I dreamed having a perfect story for us, we're almost near to the top. We're almost going to be wed not taking many years again. But it all broke just by this. I soaked myself from fairy tales that I didn't know I'll get broken and can't fixed anymore. 

I wipe my cheeks immediately, as if afraid Seffie might see the tears I just shed. We stayed on the couch for the mean time until she became okay. Mind you, she still look so angelic even after being nervous about me.

When she remembered something, she looks at me in the eyes as she earned her courage to ask. “You are broken, right?” 

I swallowed the bile on my throat and avoided her gaze. She chase my eyes. “Why you didn't tell this to me?” she asked wanting to know my reasons ahead.

“I'm your friend but you chose to keep it to yourself. We're even staying in one room, yet you didn't care to tell me everything?” She almost shouted that I closed my eyes, not wanting see her rant.

Seffie left me sitting on the couch. She snapped her hands on the air, walking back and fort. “Just wow Grace! I won't even know this without you seeing so broke just a while ago. I wouldn't even know if you just didn't faint after asking me a glass of water. Really?” She scoffed at me and shut her eyes. “Tell me everything,” she said seriously.

I don't have any choice that's why I told her everything. From the very beginning up until last. She deserve to know it anyway. I just wish she won't get worried about me every now and then. I don't want her mind me before herself. 

I startled when my phone beep for a message coming and after, my phone rangs. I look at my Hermes bag beside me. This was also from him. Gosh, everything I have comes from him. 

I glance to where Seffie is. She's still glaring at me because of what I just told. She's mad, I know, but it's still not clear. We don't have any enough evidences to point out it was really true. We still need confirmations through Bill. 

It was hard for me to process, he's my fiance. I trusted him that I already planned to marry him and be my husband for the rest of my life. But I guess, I still don't know him fully. He has still this side that I didn't know. I was filled with love that it wasn't really pure. I've been blinded by that. I got attracted because he's too soft to even make mistakes. He's to fragile to even commit cheatings. I shouldn't let my heart controlled me. This is my fault after all.

I sighed. I took my phone out of the bag and didn't care to look at who's the one calling in the middle of the night. I answered the call tiredly. 

“This is Grace Simson, how may I help you?” I tried to sound okay but I failed. 

“Graceian,” A hoarse voice in the other line startled me. I gasped in shocked. I'm not expecting him to call me before this day ends but he did. My heart comes out on my rib cage just by this time. 

“Bill!” I stammered as I called his name. I nearly lose a grip from my phone because of my shaking hands. I put the phone on my left hand and tightened my hold. 

Seffie rush beside me and tried to grab my phone and throw anywhere but I eyed her. I want to take this chance now as I can't face him in our next conversation personally. 

“How are you Grace?” he asked gently. “I'm sorry love, I just got my free time to check on you.” He sighed. I bite my lower lip and can't help not to sob. How dare him still call me love when he don't deserve to call me that!

“It's been a month now, we haven't talked to each other my love. I miss you,” he said with sincerity and longing for me.

My tears suddenly flow continuously. I can't believe for his such show. He almost gets my heart again on his acting skills. Damn it. 

“Do you.. still.. love me Bill?” out of the world I just said. Silence filled on the other line. 

My heart finally broke. How come he couldn't answer me that it took minutes and minutes, he couldn't answer my goddamn question. It is easy for him to say that he still loves me if he really is but he can't lift even any words. His long silence answered all of my thoughts ahead. 

A warm hands embrace me behind. I shuttered into pieces. My long hope is finally cut. “How dare you Bill! I love you that I gave you all myself. I trusted you the most than those family I have. I planned to marry you after your promotion but you gave it up easily.” I cried hard. My voice trembled as I can't contain to speak without so much hatred.

“I love you that I let you reach your dreams. I supported you with all of your shits. But this is what I earned from you? Bill... you're nearly get promoted. That is what we've been waiting right?” I talked to him with all the hopes I still have.“But why all of the sudden you give up? You give up our relationship for just those women?” I can't help to raise my voice at him. 

He's still in the line but he never tried to explain his side. He never stop me accusing him because maybe... I'm really right. He let me accused him because he can't deny it, he can't think other excuses. I can only hear his sighs and gasps.

Seffie tried to stop me from shouting because of so much anger seething my heart and soul. She rubbed my back but I can't calm down. 

“Sshh, that's enough Grace.” She tried to get the phone but I didn't allow her to take it out of my hold.

“No Seff, let me voice out all of the pain I suffered!” I spatted her. “My gosh, Bill! To tell you the truth, it was so creepy to received such tremendous stuff inside my work. Note that I just stepped inside at early morning and your pictures with your girl greeted me nice, big time!” I gulped. 

“Seriously? I hate who ever sends me those but you know what? I thanked him, because first of all, he wakes me up for this such fake world you gave to me. I thanked him because he showed me your true identity! You're gross Bill. You're are gross!” I shouted angrily.

I shivered at my voice Im not even familiar. How lucky I am to be brave just to say those to him without even breaking. I said to myself that I should keep quiet and let him first explain his self because I loved him, anyway. He still my fiance after all. But now he didn't care to speak, I felt being beaten. He really admitted his mistakes.  

I don't give a damn if it's true, the only important is if he pleaded I'll forgive him and forget his cowardness, but he didn't. 

“I-I'm.. sorry Grace... I'm sorry.. I'm sorry,” he repeatedly said. 

“I'm afraid to break my father's trust on me. I can't marry you, Grace. You're not yet worth to marry.” He cried on the other line but I don't care now. How dumb I am to even love him. He's not a man of his own. 

He can explain it to me but he never did. He tried to fixed the messed but he just plainly make it more serious than as it is. He chose to cheat rather tell it to me and I'll help him. I'll support him if he can't marry me after his promotion. I will understand him but still he choose what he thinks the best.

I'm now having second thoughts about him. How come I ended up loving him for almost 3 years? I just realized I should cut all the ties we both have. I should leave this because it's not mine. It's not my money, I wasted. He's not anymore my fiance. I'm just a single now.

I laughed without humor. It feels good to hear at last that I'm now single. And he's now my ex fiance. I can now say that he's my ex.