2—Love After Heartbreak

Anna stared at her husband, asked; “Jacob, who is she?”

“Anna, I told you to respect my privacy,” he snapped.

“Privacy?” She let out a short, disbelieving laugh. “You’re talking about privacy when you’re cheating on your wife?”

His jaw tightened. “Lower your voice.”

“Who the hell is your safe space, Jacob?” She stood up from the bed, her hands trembling at her sides. “I’m asking you a question!”

Jacob looked exactly like a man who had finally been caught. He didn’t deny it, or claim she was misunderstanding anything, didn’t even try to lie.

Instead, he took a slow breath and said; “Now that you know about her, let’s have an open marriage, Anna.”

Anna stared at him. For a second, she genuinely thought she had heard him wrong.

“What?” she couldn't believe what she heard.

“You heard me. Let’s have an open marriage.” His voice was calm, as though he was simply suggesting they change restaurants for dinner.

Her hand moved before her mind could catch up.

Smack!

The sound of her palm hitting his cheek echoed through the room.

Jacob’s face turned slightly from the force of the slap.

“You’ve been cheating on me with another woman all this time?” Her voice broke. Tears blurred her vision.

“Anna…” She grabbed the front of his robe, her fingers curling tightly into the fabric. He caught her hands and forced them away from his collar.

“Anna, stop it.”

She stumbled backward.

“But why did you do this to me?” she asked, her lips trembled.

Jacob said nothing, he didn't look guilty at all.

“Why?” Her tears finally rolled down her cheeks. “Was I not enough for you?”

He exhaled heavily, looking almost annoyed by her tears.

“Isn’t it obvious? We’ve been having problems lately. We’re always fighting. Always arguing about something. Aren’t you tired?”

Anna stared at him through her tears.

“No.” She shook her head. “No, I wasn’t tired.” Her voice grew louder. “You were the one who started all of it!”

She wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand, but more tears immediately replaced the ones she had wiped away.

“You were always the one picking fights with me. You were always calling me fat. You told me to stay inside like I was something you were ashamed of. You insulted me. You made me feel like I was a burden every single day.” Her voice cracked. “You treated me like you didn’t love me, meanwhile you've been cheating, Jacob, treating me like shit, why?!”

Jacob’s face remained cold.

"Because I don’t love you anymore.”

Those seven words went through her like a knife.

She loved this man for years. Years believing that whatever happened between them, whatever arguments they had, whatever difficult seasons they went through, they would eventually find their way back to each other.

“I’ve tried to tell you,” he continued. “You just wouldn’t listen, or try to understand. Ever since you came back from Indonesia, I’ve known that I don’t feel the same way anymore.”

Anna’s lips trembled. She bit down hard, desperately trying to keep herself from crying harder. It didn’t work. Tears streamed down her face even more. She's hurt, at the same time trying to be strong, he shouldn't see her in tears.

“Don’t feel the same way…” she repeated quietly, as though saying the words aloud would somehow make them less painful.

She looked at the man standing in front of her. Her husband. The man she had loved since her college days. The man who once held her hand and promised that they would get through everything together.

They've been married for five years, and dated before that. She was just eighteen when she found out she was pregnant. Terrified, she dropped out of college because everything became too overwhelming. Her parents begged her to abort the baby, but she refused. When they turned their backs on her because of that decision, Jacob stayed. He stood beside her. He told her he wanted his child to be legitimate. So they got married.

But their baby didn’t survive. They lost their child only a few days after birth. That loss nearly destroyed her. And somehow, Jacob and she had remained together.

She swallowed painfully. “You don’t love me anymore?”

She asked again, hoping he would take it back, or that he would see the tears on her face and realize how badly he was hurting her.

But Jacob only looked at her and said, “Yeah, I love someone else, and I don't think we can work out at this point.”

She smiled in tears, now they can't work out, after all.his promises.

Then his phone rang.

He glanced at the screen. Without saying another word, he turned around and walked out of the room to answer the call.

Anna remained where she was. Her tears kept falling. She didn’t wipe them this time. Her legs finally gave way, and she slowly sank onto the edge of the bed.

She pressed a trembling hand against her chest.

She is not weak, it just that it hurts. God, it actually hurt.

She thought rejection from companies was painful. She thought spending an entire day hearing “no” after “no” was humiliating. But this was different.

Because she could find another job. She could leave Singapore. She could start over.

But how was she supposed to find another heart after he had broken hers?

She lowered her head as another sob escaped her lips.

How was this even possible?

Jacob promised her forever and now he didn’t love her anymore.

His words kept repeating inside her head, over and over again, until they stopped sounding like words and started feeling like knives being pushed deeper into her chest.

Five years. One, two, three, four, five…

Five years of marriage.

He has fallen out of love with her.

What if she didn’t check his phone? When was he going to tell her?

A broken laugh escaped her as tears continued to fall.