Chapter 2: My secret love

SEBASTIAN’S POV

Present time…..

"Gosh, you got it so bad for this guy, ain't you?" Maggie chuckled, scrolling through the pictures on my laptop. "You literally have a folder full of his photos. Oh my god, Seb!"

"Shut up," I groaned, burying my face into my pillow as I felt the warmth quickly gather on my cheeks.

"My goodness, you are even blushing just thinking about him."

"Maggie, just get out of my room, dude." I protested meekly, unable to hide the smile that forced its way to my lips.

Fuck, I couldn't believe I was blushing over the one guy who couldn't give two shits about me. The guy who hated me more than anything, but there I was getting giddy just by thinking about him.

Yes, it was sad and pathetic, man, but I didn't care.

That exact part of thinking about him was the most favorite part of my day. I enjoyed doing it, fantasizing about him and creating scenes in my head that I knew would never come true. I mean, that was the only way I would ever get close to him, feel him, apart from when we were beating the crap out of each other, of course. Which I hated so much, by the way, but it wasn't like I had the luxury to just do whatever the fuck I wanted.

I was the captain of Milton Lions, and he was the captain of St. Jose Warriors, so historically, anything other than smacking the shit out of each other on and off the field was not fucking entertained.

It sucked but that was the way it was.

"Seriously, Seb, if you are so in love with him, why don't you just tell him?" Maggie asked as she came to sit next to me on my bed.

I sat up straight, leaning back against the headboard, an exhausted sigh passing through my lips. "It's not that simple, sis. And have you met Zaire? That fucker is a hothead, I swear to you."

I chuckled as I thought about all the time he had caused me trouble. That boy was stubborn as hell.

"And he's straight, that's another thing." I added, looking over at my big sister.

Maggie groaned dramatically, falling back onto my bed. "Straight, gay, who cares anymore? You won't know unless you try."

I scoffed, rubbing the back of my neck. "Yeah, right. And how exactly do I try that without him breaking my nose again?"

"Hmm, fair point," she said, grinning. "He does look like the type to throw a punch first and talk later."

I chuckled softly. "That's Zaire for you."

It was stupid, really, how easily his name made something twist inside my chest. Every time I saw him, whether it was at a game or just walking down the street with his stupid smirk and those stupid brown eyes, my heart did that annoying stutter thing. And no matter how much I told myself to stop being a loser, I couldn't.

The guy had me. Completely.

I tried to hate him. I really did. After all, all he did was humiliate me and not care one bit about my feelings. But even when we fought, even when he was pissed off and shouting in my face, there was something about him that always made my brain short-circuit. Like I could feel everything I wasn't supposed to and that scared the shit out of me.

"You know," Maggie said, sitting up and nudging me with her foot, "you should probably stop stalking him on social media before he finds out. That's next-level creepy, even for you."

I gave her a deadpan look. "Wow. Thanks for the support."

She laughed. "I'm just saying. Maybe stop collecting his football pictures like you're making a shrine or something."

I opened my mouth to argue but quickly shut it. Yeah, maybe I was a little obsessed. But it wasn't like I could help it. Zaire had this strong pull on me that I couldn't explain. It was fucking crazy.

I looked over to my desk, staring at the open laptop. Zaire's gorgeous face stared back at me. It was the photo from last season's championship game, the one where he was drenched in rain, his helmet in his hand, and his brown skin looking absolutely mesmerizing under the drizzling rain. And that fucking smile?

My God, what I would do for him to smile at me like that.

"You are daydreaming again. God, Zaire Gibson, what have you done to my little brother!" Maggie laughed, throwing her head back.

I laughed too, awkwardly brushing the back of my neck. This was so embarrassing.

"You are so whipped, man. I have never seen you so invested in someone. I knew you were a fuck boy before, but this is new. Sebastian Burkhart is actually in love? This is a miracle!"

"Stop exaggerating." I grinned, looking back on the picture dreamily. "I mean, just look at him, Maggie, isn't he just gorgeous?"

"You are so gay."

I nodded my head, a big smile plastered on my face. "Yes, for him, I am."

"What about the other boys?"

"I mean, I don't really take it up the ass, but him... I'll gladly let him fuck me."

"Okay gosh, I didn't wanna hear that you know," Maggie cringed as I busted out laughing.

"Come on, I'm hungry. Let's go to Wendy's to grab something to eat," I said between laughs.

Maggie rolled her eyes, a wide smile curved up on her face as we both headed for the door.

♧♧♧

Wendy's was just a couple blocks away from our house. It was a small and famous diner around St Jose, which was populated by students most of the time, especially during after school hours.

The familiar hum of chatter and laughter filled the air. The scent of grease, fries, and milkshakes was thick, almost comforting. It was packed as usual, clusters of students from both St. Jose High and Milton Academy scattered across booths.

I followed Maggie inside, hands stuffed in the pockets of my jeans. Maggie was already chatting up the girl at the counter. I scanned the room lazily and felt my breath catch in my throat when my gaze landed on the boy of my dreams himself.

Zaire sat two booths away with his teammates, all in their stupid matching red and black varsity jackets, laughing so obnoxiously loud over something that probably wasn't even funny.

My heart literally skipped a beat the second my eyes found him. He had a fresh fade, and his dreadlocks were braided into double-strand twists, which looked so fucking good on him. His jawline was sharp, high cheekbones, and I couldn't help my eyes that slowly drifted down to his full pink lips.

I clenched my teeth, biting back the desire that wanted to cloud my senses. Alongside his striking hazel eyes that seemed to pierce right through you, those lips were another part of Zaire's face that I found so fucking attractive. They just looked so delicious, man, and so fucking kissable. Every goddamn day, I wondered how they would feel against my own.

A frown quickly morphed onto my face, though, when I noticed all the bruises on his face. Dark marks still lingered along his cheekbone and jaw, fading from purple to yellow. And there was one cut near his eyebrow that looked like it hadn't even healed yet.

My stomach twisted painfully.

God, I'd done that. Or at least part of it. The memory of our last fight hit me like a sucker punch.

Last Friday at the bonfire, both teams went at it again. This time, it was Craig who had slept with one of the Warriors' girlfriends. The guy confronted him, and it all went down from there. It was like a thing now, where the boys just slept with the other's girl or sister just to taunt them. The Warriors did it to us, and we did to them. It was like a sick game that, of course, usually ended in some kind of a fight.

As usual, I would try my best to avoid Zaire as much as I could whenever things got violent because I hated putting my hands on him. It hurt me so much hurting him. But for him, I was his number one target. God forbid that the fight ends without him laying two or three hits on me. And that hurt more than his punches ever could.

I didn't mean shit to him. He made that crystal clear every single time.

"Hey, you okay?" Maggie's voice pulled me out of my spiral.

"Yeah," I said too quickly, dragging my eyes away. "Just—uh—nothing."

But I couldn't stop looking. Even when Zaire looked up for a split second, and our eyes met across the diner, my throat went dry. Almost instantly, his smile vanished and turned into a scowl. It was obvious he couldn't even stand the sight of me. I was like a nuisance to him.

He didn't look away first. I did. I looked down at the table like a coward, pretending to check my phone. But I could feel him still watching me.

"He's here, isn't he?" Maggie asked.

I swallowed hard. "Yeah. He's here."

She sighed, placing a hand on her hip. "Then let's grab our food and go before a scene is created. I know about that stupid rivalry between y'all teams… such immaturity, I swear to god."

I nodded in agreement and then went to take a seat at one of the booths closer to the counter as we waited for our food. I took a chair facing away from Zaire's table on purpose just to avoid looking at him and his idiot friends.

It was barely a few seconds later when Maggie whispered, looking behind me. "Oh oh, they are coming this way."

I sighed exasperatedly, leaning against the chair.

God help me because this was going to be a long goddamn day, and I was so not in the mood to hear shit from anyone, except maybe if it was from him.

Even so, I didn't know how much patience I still had to keep up with all of this crap.

Because one of these days, I was sure going to shut his pretty mouth up the best way I knew how.