Chapter 7

Lisa

I finally made it through the crowd, bursting through the palace doors. Lucille paced in my head, torn between growling and sobbing and jumping back and forth faster than I could keep up.

I was suddenly beyond nauseous. I bent over a plant, losing the little bit of food my stomach contained. I wiped my mouth, breathing hard as I finally let the dam break. Tears poured down my face. They continued burning like fire as they followed the same trail over and over.

I covered my mouth, trying to mute the broken, inhuman sounds that were coming from me. A few people walked into the palace, their gaze landing on me cautiously before they hurried away like this was the moment I finally showed all of the darkness and destroyed everything.

I couldn’t help but roll my eyes, scooting a little farther away from the door, trying to shield myself from sight and lose it in peace without people looking at me like my despair would somehow harm them.

The palace door burst open and I watched from behind the plants as Sydney burst through them, her head whipping back and forth quickly as her eyes scanned the room, looking for me.

Lucille growled and before I could stop it, it slipped past my lips. I tried to shove Lucille back, but she refused. I tried to move, but it was too late. Sydney’s eyes landed on mine as she quickly made her way to me.

She was breathing hard, face red, her eyes apologetic and concerned. My tears came faster as I looked up at her from my pitiful position crunched up on the floor.

“Lisa.”

A broken sob slipped from my throat. “No, it’s okay, Sydney. Just give me a second. You did nothing wrong. Lucille is just too worked up right now. Clearly you knew him and you told me you were excited to have some fun with old friends tonight…”

Sydney’s eyes widened as she blanched in disgust. She dropped on the floor beside me as I looked curiously at her green face. Her hand landed on my arm, squeezing tightly.

“I’m gonna stop you right there. I cannot tell you how wrong you are, and I only wish I had noticed you as quickly as I noticed Rowan so I could have explained immediately.”

I took a breath, looking at her more clearly as my heartbeat calmed and Lucille paused the chaos of growls, sobs, and threats she was shouting in my head.

“Rowan is not one of those friends I was talking about earlier. He is my cousin. I was excited to see him because it had been years. He doesn’t stay with the coven much and never comes to any events. Since we grew up and started our own lives, I don’t get to see him often, and I was excited to see the boy I grew up with. We were close, more like siblings than cousins growing up. His mom was as much of a mom to me as Tori.”

A mix of relief and embarrassment for my jealous behavior filled my body, my face burning, letting me know it was bright red so Sydney could see the embarrassment I felt.

“Oh my gosh, I’m so dumb. I thought…”

Sydney held a hand up in front of my face, stopping my words.

“I know what you thought after Rowan told me what was happening, what I interrupted. That’s why I came to find you, to clear that up immediately.”

My eyes widened.

He told her.

“Oh my gosh, I had just met him, then you and I thought and Lucille just lost it and so did I. He probably thinks I’m absolutely bonkers. Well, that whole thing should have made it at least easier for him to reject me.”

Sydney laughed lightly as the words piled out of me.

“Lisa, he doesn’t think you’re crazy. He just thinks that you think he’s an asshole that would show affection to a girl he was interested in romantically in front of his mate.”

My face heated even more.

“I doubt that, Syd. He is your family and I’m sure he’s great, but he knows as much as I do we can’t be together. He was not worried about what I thought of him. I’m honestly almost certain he was preparing to reject me when you arrived.”

Sydney laughed again, her sweet giggle filling the room and making me clench my jaw. She was acting like I was joking and I, in fact, had never been more serious. I was about to lose the mate I had dreamed of finding the very day I met him.

Sydney saw my face and her laughter cut off, her expression growing more serious.

“Lisa, Rowan told me he was not going to reject you yet. Yes, he knows as much as we all do the problems a mate bond such as yours will bring. He knows you will be accused of lying and told it’s impossible. He knows the council will hate it and so will the, uhh… organizations he works for. But let me tell you, Rowan isn’t as big of an asshole as he comes off to be, and he has never been one for giving a shit about rules or what society thinks is right. He has his own moral code. So yes, he is worrying about all of the same things as you. That’s why he was trying to have a conversation with you, to talk about all of those things. His words.”

Sydney promised, making my heart jump and butterflies swarm in my stomach. I clenched my eyes tightly together.

“I can’t face him right now. Like you said, he knows this bond can’t be joined either, witches and wolves, it just isn’t accepted. But I also can’t accept losing my mate already either. I just need time.”

Sydney sighed.

“Okay, Lis, but I also wouldn’t count on a rejection or him letting you reject him so quickly and easily either. Once the shock wears off, I’m sure he will be looking for you. Rowan trusts our goddess, and if she thinks you are perfect for him, then so will he very soon.”

Sydney promised as she stood up, looking at me for a second longer before she walked away, leaving me with all my conflicting feelings.