Chapter 8

Rowan

waited for Sydney to reappear, the lump that settled in my stomach only grew as she finally returned. Her face was a mask of calm that I had seen her practice many times when she was about to make a situation seem better than it actually was.

She forced a light little smile as she made it to me.

“She isn’t up to coming back out to finish your conversation right now. She will be, just give her a moment to collect her thoughts.”

The muscle in my jaw bounced as I fought to stay in my place.

Every instinct inside of me screamed to ignore Sydney and go after Lisa myself. The bond pulled hard in my chest, sharp and demanding, like something inside of me was clawing toward her no matter how much logic tried to hold me back.

I had spent my entire life trusting logic.

Magic was unpredictable. People were unpredictable. Emotions made people reckless, weak, irrational. I learned that lesson young, watching covens turn against each other, watching alliances shatter because people chose feelings over survival.

But this?

This didn’t feel reckless.

It felt inevitable.

That was the problem.

“You’re thinking too loudly,” Sydney muttered, eyeing me carefully.

I huffed out a humorless laugh. “Good to know my suffering is entertaining for you.”

“Oh, it absolutely is,” she replied instantly, though her expression softened a second later. “You look like you’re trying not to crawl out of your own skin.”

Because I was.

I dragged a hand through my hair, glancing toward the palace doors again even though I knew Lisa wasn’t going to suddenly walk back through them. I could still feel the bond stretching between us, tense and painful from the distance.

I didn’t understand how wolves lived like this.

Witches didn’t have mates. We had attraction, connection, love if we were lucky enough to find it, but nothing like this. Nothing that rooted itself into your bones within seconds and suddenly made another person feel necessary for your survival.

Necessary.

The word alone irritated me.

I didn’t need anyone.

I had spent years building my life specifically so I wouldn’t.

And now the goddess apparently thought it would be funny to tie me to a council wolf with sad blue eyes and enough emotional damage to rival my own.

“Stop glaring at the ground before you burn a hole through it,” Sydney said, bumping my shoulder lightly.

“I’m thinking.”

“That’s what worries me.”

I rolled my eyes, but my chest loosened slightly at the familiar banter. Sydney had always been one of the only people capable of pulling me out of my own head when it got too loud.

Usually.

Right now even she was struggling.

“She cried?” I asked finally, the words rougher than I intended.

Sydney’s expression shifted immediately.

“A little,” she admitted carefully.

Pain twisted sharply through my chest.

Fantastic.

I had known this girl for all of fifteen minutes and somehow seeing tears in her eyes already felt unbearable.

“That bad?” I muttered.

Sydney gave me a long look before sighing. “Rowan, Lisa has spent years feeling like people fear her for something she never asked for. She already feels isolated from everyone around her. Then she finds her mate, the one person who is supposed to fully accept her…”

She trailed off slightly.

“And it turns out to be the one thing society would never allow.”

Guilt settled heavily in my stomach.

Not because of who I was.

I wasn’t ashamed of being a witch.

But because she was right.

This bond didn’t just complicate things for us. It put a target directly on Lisa’s back.

The council would question her judgment immediately. The packs would whisper. Some would accuse her of lying. Others would think the darkness inside her somehow manipulated the bond itself.

And the coven?

I already knew exactly how many of them would react.

Fear disguised as concern.

Disgust disguised as tradition.

A council wolf and a witch with my reputation? They would tear it apart before it even had the chance to breathe.

“You’re spiraling again,” Sydney observed.

I exhaled slowly through my nose. “Can you blame me?”

“No,” she admitted. “But you’re also assuming the end of the world before you’ve even properly spoken to her.”

I barked out a short laugh. “Pretty sure I made an excellent first impression.”

That at least got a real smile out of Sydney.

“To be fair, she thought I was publicly claiming you in front of her.”

I groaned, dropping my head into my hands briefly. “Please stop reminding me about that.”

Sydney laughed harder now, the sound echoing through the quieter edge of the gardens.

“You should have seen your face when I explained it.”

“I’m glad my suffering continues entertaining everyone tonight.”

“Oh, it does.”

I shook my head, but despite everything, the tension in my chest eased slightly.

Only slightly.

Because even now I could still feel her.

The bond pulsed faintly under my skin, restless and aching. Every few seconds my gaze drifted back toward the palace doors without permission.

“She really isn’t coming back out?” I asked quietly.

Sydney’s teasing expression faded.

“She just needs a little time, Rowan. You both got hit with something huge tonight.”

Huge didn’t even begin to cover it.

Impossible felt more accurate.

I leaned back against the edge of the drink table, folding my arms tightly across my chest as the party continued around us. Wolves laughed loudly nearby, completely unaware that my entire life had shifted an hour ago.

Nothing looked different.

And yet everything felt different.

The air itself seemed sharper somehow.

“She’s beautiful,” I admitted before I could stop myself.

Sydney snorted. “Yeah, no shit.”

I ignored her.

“It wasn’t even just that,” I continued quietly. “When she looked at me…” I shook my head slowly. “It felt like she saw every ugly part of me immediately and didn’t look away.”

Sydney went strangely quiet at that.

“That’s probably because Lisa knows what it feels like to think people only see the worst parts of you,” she said softly.

Something in my chest twisted again.

The bond reacted strongly whenever I thought about her. Protective. Possessive. Curious.

Mine.

The instinct slammed into me so suddenly it almost made me recoil from it.

Dangerous.

That kind of thinking was dangerous.

Especially with someone like Lisa.

Especially with the world we lived in.

Sydney studied me carefully for another long moment before sighing.

“You’re already attached.”

“I am not.”

“You absolutely are.”

I opened my mouth to argue, then stopped.

Because I was.

And goddess help me, I didn’t know what to do about it.