Tiara“The doctors said you’ll be fine.”Grace nods her bandaged forehead, “I know.” Her tired eyes search the room, “Where is Ciara?”I wonder if she’ll still search the room for her if she knew Ciara deemed it right for Donald to hit her, “She went to get some clothes,” I say instead, “she’ll be back in a while.”“But I’m here,” Melody announces, tramping inside the hospital room with three bars of chocolate in her hand, “and I brought snacks.”I roll my eyes at her. “I don’t think she can eat that, Mel.”“Why not?”I give her my best are-you-kidding-me look, struggling to hide my smile. “Because she is recovering.”“Oh she definitely can eat these,” she plops on a seat beside the bed, opposite me on the other side, “it’s nutritional and besides, I saw a super cute doctor downstairs who gave me the go ahead . . . and his number,” she winks.That gets my mother to chuckle, “Well, it’s a good thing I ended up in the hospital then.”“Definitely,” Melody jokes.“Right. I’ll keep that in
Tiara“I don’t think . . .” my mother trails off, her gaze pinging back and forth between me and the doctor, “I don’t think you got that right, she . . .”I’m still staring into space, wondering if I just fantasized the whole interaction. Not that I would want to fantasize about something like that anyway.“Tee?” Melody calls, reaching out to give me a gentle shake, “Tee?”“I. . .” shaken, I look up at the doctor, “something is . . . you’ve got to,” I shake my head, “I can’t be.”“Yeah, I mean,” Melody opens her palm in explanation, “you used protections and stuff.”I shoot her a look. “I did.”“I know. And pills work like eighty percent of the time. You took pills immediately you . . .” the back of her hand goes to her mouth as she trails of and I know what she is thinking about even before she says it. “Except that first time . . .”My mother jerks her head, “What?”The images hit me – the kiss on the yacht during the truth or dare game, then right after the truth or dare game, the
TiaraI gasp, getting up.“We don’t know how old the fetus is, we have to do a scan to be sure, but in my opinion, you’re only a few weeks gone.”Oh my God. Oh no! I start pacing around the room. How the hell is this happening?I’m panicking, right here, right now. I don’t know if I want this, I sure as hell don’t want to be the other woman in my sister’s marriage. I don’t even know if –Melody’s words break through my thoughts. “We need a minute, doc.”“Of course,” the door closes behind the doctor as she leaves and Melody comes up to put her arms around me.“Congratulations, babe,” she whispers in my ears.Easier for her to say, she’s not the one carrying her sister’s boyfriend’s child.I look back at my mother, all bandaged up, with tears welling in her eyes, “Come here, Tee,” she stretches her hand to pull me in a hug.How can they be happy about this? How can they see this as a good thing? I’m not ready, I don’t think I—Oh God!“Well, we’ve got to tell Ryan about this,” my mothe
TiaraI grab my bag, shoving my phone inside it with a hurried thrust.“Are you sure about this?” Melody asks me.I nod. “Yeah.”“Tell me where you’re going to be at least.”I shrug, “I’ll tell you immediately I figure it out. I just need some time off, decide on things. I’ll figure it out and get back.”My mother was right. I can’t stay here and make any rash decisions regarding my child’s future when I just found out minutes ago. I need to be calm, I need to gather my nerves and I need to put everything in deep consideration.Melody stands to give me a hug. “Come back, okay. We can’t have you leaving New York. You’ve got everything here. So figure it all out and come back.”I can’t bring myself to tell her that I am willing to move to the end of the world and back for this baby growing inside me and not just out of New York. I love her too much to break her heart like that.“I’ll be gone for a few days,” I say instead, “weigh my options. I just don’t think I should be here, close to
RyanI hit the streets for a sunrise run as soon as I wake up and by the time I roll back into my apartment, Ciara is already gone.But barely.I can still smell the luxurious scent of her mist, a scent I was once in love with, lingering in the air as I make a strong cup of coffee and drown the hot liquid in one gulp.My guts keep eating at me as I reflect on my life.I’m an unhappy mess. A gloom-filled spark-less soul, a sadness that refuses to lift.No matter how much I try to block it out, Tiara’s words from last night are still stuck like a stubborn tumor in my head;“So what happens in the long run? You’re going to get married to her?”“In the long run? Very likely, yeah.”Would I marry Ciara in the long run? I try to picture it in my head.It’s not working out.I know how much I don’t want my child to be raised in a broken home like the one I grew up in, but if I let my child get raised in a home with Ciara and I co-parenting . . . I think of the exchange yesterday, I think of t
RyanThe ride to the hospital is a short one because for some reason, they chose a small, private one close to Tiara’s apartment. Because of the size of the building, it is easy to locate the hospital ward that temporarily housed Grace Lemptons even though I had to wait by the reception for intolerable minutes while the receptionist contacted the doctors for visitation permission.I am not surprised to see Ciara in the room beside her mother’s bed and Amy by her side. I am surprised however not to see Tiara on the other side of the bed.Throw that in with more than a little disappointment.How is she missing in action, the time I finally want to let her know how I really feel?Ciara’s eyes shoot up from her mother’s face. “Ryan? You got my message?”As much as I want to tell her I came here for Tiara, I think it is best that I speak to Tiara first before I talk to anyone else about my intentions. “Yes. I did,” I lie, “that’s why you left so early?”She averts her gaze and nods. “Yup.
TiaraThe beach house reeks of settled dust.And the salty, tangy scent of the beach.During the springs and summers we spent here, my mother always had the cleaners in and out before we moved in so we never had to do any sort of clean up.Hell, I didn’t even know there could be so much dust down here – fine, powdery coating that settles on the surfaces and dances in sunbeams streaming through the windows I just opened.Pulling up the cleaning gears from the broom closet immediately after I drop my bag in the room assigned to Ciara and I upstairs, I set to the task of cleaning up – dusting off surfaces, airing out the rooms, and basically just shaking of the stagnation of a long absence.In a weird way, this act of dusting feels a lot like my life. Like I am dusting away all the old things – the tears, the pain, the inferiority – and letting this new phase begin. I am having a child now, a child that I’m beginning to put above everything else, a child that has come to mean the utmost
TiaraHe looks disheveled.His hair is tousled up like he just got out of bed and forgot to run a comb through it. His gaze is drawn yet there is another emotion there, lingering in the surface that I can’t place, bordering on anger or pain or both. His breathing is coming up in short gasps like he had just been running which is as well, because he is in a casual running attire of black joggers and a matching black running t-shirt and he is looking at me with a shocked pained expression on his features as he lets himself in.“How could you, Tee?”I swallow.I might not know what he is talking about. I am inclined to indulge in wistful thinking and tell myself that he might be here for a completely different reason. After all he knows this place from all the years he dated Ciara.But even then, I know there are only two ways he figured out my whereabouts and it is only if my mother or Melody said something to him.However, there is still a chance that he doesn’t know about the baby in
TiaraHis eyes bore into Ciara’s as he steps further inside.“Jackson?” I call.“You fucking tricked me!” he spits out, his eyes on Ciara.Why isn’t he looking at me?!Ciara blinks at him. Then at me. Mirroring the same confused expression on my face.“What are you doing here?”“What the fuck do you mean?”“I mean, you’re supposed to be one state away, back in New York.”“Well, change of plans. They are on their way to Connecticut.”Wait . . . what?!“What?” Ciara voices my thought.Jackson looks exasperated when he says, “Your father. He told them about his properties in Connecticut. You didn’t foresee him ruining our plans when you made this hell of a plan?”Our plan?“What are you talking abou – Jackson?” Confusion is eating away at me and his ignoring me isn’t doing anything to help my state, “What do you mean our plan?”As expected, he ignores me again. “You said YOU WERE FUCKING PREGNANT!” he barks instead, spit flying everywhere.“A slip,” Ciara shrugs, “so what?”“Yeah?” the l
Tiara“What happened to you?” I ask her.Ciara has gone unnaturally silent in the few minutes after she whacked me across the face and I don’t want her to entertain anymore riling thoughts in her head.“Talk to me, Ciara,” I almost cannot recognize my own voice. Blood is spilling from my lips and from a cut in my forehead. My eyes are dazed but I don’t have the time anymore to register my pain and put all these in thoughts.I watch as her lips shift into an unamused smile, “You stole from me, Tee. You’ve been doing it for a long time now you are quite good at it.”“But we can fix—” she snorts, “listen to me, Ciara. Let’s fix this. We can turn this all around. Untie me, let’s go home. We’ll talk about this around a hot cup of coffee and we will forget that this ever happened.”She makes a short barking sound that is between a laugh and a short ‘ha’ sound. “You’d want that don’t you? You’d want all that and more.”“What are you talking about? We can talk about this. And Ryan? He can—”A
RyanMy hand pushes the door to a bedroom open.Empty.Then a bathroom, a guest bedroom, the closet.I hear Melody doing the same all around the house, coming up with the same results as me – nothing.This is the third house we have been to within the span of time I called Grace and now, and we still haven’t found a single thing. Not a single thing to boast of.Grace was panicked when I made the call, frantically begging me to do something, anything, to bring her daughters back. ‘Daughters’ as in plural.I didn’t stop to think about what she meant.The physical manhandling of the cop in New Jersey might get me to jail eventually but for now it seems to be doing more wonders than naught and it didn’t take up to an hour before the sirens filled the air and a search warrant was issued.Tiara James-Lemptons is missing.If the cops are not going to take this serious then they’ll have to deal with the media on their necks 24/7 for the next month. That got their asses moving.I also informed
Tiara“Hello, sister.”My throat tightens as the voice registers in my foggy brain.I blink, trying to block the too bright sun rays away from eyes in that single moment.Ciara moves a bit to her right so that she stands directly in front of the sun streaming through the window, shielding me and revealing her sneering face to me at the same time.I gasp. Somehow, I still held doubt in my head even after I heard her voice. Somehow, I thought I had been hallucinating things. But seeing her confirms that she is really here, and not just some figment of my own imaginations.“Ciara? What the fuck?” I say, even though panic is tearing at my heart.This is wrong.So wrong. Surely, the hit to my head was more than I gave it credit for because now I am seeing things.Because Ciara? Yes she hates my guts but this is just . . . extreme.I try to get up to my feet to meet her gaze because the sun behind her is illuminating her features, blocking it so I know it is her but her face is kind of part
Ryan“How sure are you that this is an assault?” The man in the cop uniform asks Melody. He has a rough beard and a cop moustache that makes him look older than his age and the bored expression on his face is like a slap to my mentality.Melody looks like she is about to shake the shit out of him when she says, “What the fuck do you mean—”“Language, ma’am.” he warns, his eyebrow raised up.“How can you stand there and ask me — how can you – there is blood on the board, dammit!”The man gives her a warning look but doesn’t say anything.She goes on anyway, “The door was left ajar, on a spring night,” she emphasized, “There is blood on the skating board, and the victim is missing. What other evidence could you possibly need?”Immediately we found the door open and we each made rounds to different parts of the house to confirm that Tiara indeed wasn’t there, we decided to call the New Jersey cops to let them know of a possible assault and file a report of a missing person.So far, there
Ryan”Fifty bucks, she fell asleep and forgot to text you,” Jackson comments from the backseat, “I mean she is human after all. We do a lot of things we haven’t done before.”“I’m not taking a bet on the safety of my best friend, Jack,” Melody shoots at him.“Safety? I mean,” Jackson shrugs, “she could literally be asleep right now, and this road trip would all be for nothing. We can just take a swing from here right now to Connecticut. I know a guy with a club that can let us—”Melody shoots daggers at him that shuts him down.He clears his throat. “Have you tried calling her again at least? I mean it’s past dawn now.”True to his words the morning sun is trickling through the open windows into the car, the warm rays, doing nothing to uplift the coldness that has settled in my guts.I’ve forgotten that Jackson asked a question until Melody speaks up again, “She is still not picking up. It’s dawn already, Tee is a morning person. She should have been up by now. And if she isn’t, then
TiaraThe humid smell of mud first hits me.For a second I am led to believe that I am in a very, very dark room. A dark room with no windows and no doors and just the right amount of oxygen.But as my eyes adjust – or in this context – fail to adjust to anything in my line of view, I realize that there is a thick material around my face that covers the entirety of my eyes. It could be sunny out there for all I know.My brain is a mush of uncontrolled thoughts and deafening buzzes and the headache just above my right eye is throbbing in a way that would make the doctors fret. If the doctors saw me now.What the fuck?What happened?The last thing I remember . . .I was in the beach house. Then I went to the beach for a stroll.No, I had gone to take my jacket from the room upstairs. But that is not the last thing I remember.The last thing I remember is me standing right across the threshold in the beach house, pulling the door open because Ryan had rang the doorbell.Wait. . .My hea
Ciara“She is being diagnosed with NPD. It’s not that rare of a case but it is as severe as any other disorder out there, maybe even more.”I remember the conversation like it was yesterday.I was ten years old and I remember being really glad my parents accompanied me to my therapist’s that day. It was one of the trips we went without Tiara and I was super pumped that she had to stay alone with boring old Mrs. Fisher, our live-in sitter at the time.My mother had squinted her eyes at the doctor while my father remained calm like he’ll rather be anywhere else in the world than here, listening to some boring ass therapist.I felt exactly the same way.“What is that?” my mother asked, “What does NPD even mean?”“Well,” my therapist adjusted her glasses like someone about to give a very educated, very important but also very boring lecture. “The word, NPD is an acronym for “Narcissistic Personality Disorder” and it is categorized in most cases by a need for control, and,” she starts tick
Ryan: “Meet me outside your apartment. ASAP”I stare at the message from Melody again as I shrug on a coat. It is weird enough that she wants to talk to me this late in the night or – I check the time on the clock, it is just a little after three am – morning, but what is even weird is that she is already in front of my apartment meaning that whatever she has to say is that urgent.She is standing by her car when I walk out, a slight frown on her face, and she has Jackson standing beside her like some protective bodyguard of some sorts.“That urgent?” I ask her, gesturing between both of them.“He was with me when I decided to come here, wouldn’t let me leave alone,” she replies.I raise an eyebrow at this and he waves off. “Shut the fuck up, bro.”Great. I didn’t know where we stood after the mini threat-like statement he made yesterday but this statement just cleared things up. “You don’t see me saying anything,” I smirk. I like him better when he isn’t oogling over Tiara.I jut my