Tiara I’m not going to make any attempt to deceive myself that I’m moving on.I don’t think that’s how moving on works.But to be fair to myself, it’s only been two weeks and four days and I don’t think people move on that easily.It’s no surprise that Ryan didn’t reach out to me throughout those two weeks and it’s no surprise that there were no texts from my end either, that is, if you decide not to count that one sloppy text on the first week which would’ve been followed by a series of other sloppy texts if Melody hadn’t stopped me.If things are really over between us, there is no point in sinking deeper into the pathetic hole by exchanging texts that will lead nowhere.That said, I can’t be blamed for the surprise that punches me in the guts on the fifth day of the third week when a notification pops up on my phone, with a text from Ryan.It is a simple text, formal and concise; “At what time do you prefer me to pick you up?”And I stare at the phone in awe, wondering if I just h
Tiara“You forgot?” Ryan voice is cold, judgmental.I throw my hands in the air, “Well, I’ve not exactly been thinking about that lately.”He is in a formal suit, although it’s hard to associate his boyish looks with the word ‘formal’. He adjusts his tie as he regards me. “Didn’t you get my text?”“I thought you meant to send ‘em to someone else!”He shakes his head, stepping into my apartment. “When has that ever happened?”I try not to think too much about being in the same room with him as I scroll through my phone, unarchiving Melody’s contact. She has sent me a half dozen text telling me to get ready for the show and I’m sure she tried to reach me a thousand times too.Fuck!I shoot her a text; “Almost done, I’ll meet you there.” before throwing the phone back on the couch.Ryan’s gaze is still on me when I look up. “So…”“I’ll go get dressed. I don’t take up a lotta time getting ready.”I’m halfway across the room to my bedroom when I spin around and face him again. “Why did you
RyanThis is a bad idea.I knew it from the moment I smelled her perfume and refused to look at her. Smelling her was already enough for me for my body to start its stupid reaction to her.I don’t like the feeling I got in my guts when I noticed her puffy eyes, knowing I caused her that pain and I hate the way her eyes drops whenever I hit her with a cold ‘monosyllabic’ response but I can’t do anything about it because the thought of her actions two years ago is still fresh in my mind.The question; how could she not say anything? keeps popping in my head, with a fresh wave of anger.But how can you be angry at someone and still be madly in love with her?She steps in front of me, stopping me from opening the door to the building for her and I don’t know if it’s a deliberate move or a nonchalant one but I have no choice but to take in the full view of her body in that outfit as we walk into the fancy hall.Holy hell?Her dress is long and black, simple at first glance but clinging to
Tiara“This is a sunset in Greece,” I narrate to Ryan, pointing at a picture on the wall, “it’s a copy of the one I took with my dad. The original is in my apartment.”“Are you supposed to put out copies?”“No but this is exactly the same thing as the original. Even better because of the upgraded edits. I only kept the original because of the memories it holds.”We are at the space provided to showcase most of my works and I’m itching to ask him if he is the anonymous buyer. It’s cheesy I know, especially if I do ask him and it turns out he is not the one but I’m dying to know and if he is, I’m dying to know his reasons.Surely, he couldn’t hate me much if he paid all that money to purchase my work.Could he?“And that?” he points at a picture or a sleeping squirrel taken at an angle that shows the squirrel in a perfectly detailed angle.“That was just something I took last year when I was bored.”He walks up to another picture and I hold my breath as he scrutinizes it. “I recognize t
RyanHow can I stay away from her and focus on my oncoming child . . . when she kisses like that?I had known it was a mistake going to that exhibition and I’d gone anyway. Telling myself, scratch that, deceiving myself that I was going in order not to break my word to her. I might be a man of my words but the reason I went to her apartment was because I was missing her to a point of crazy and I was losing it and I had to see her. I just had to see her.Well, I saw her, held her, kissed her and reminded myself that I couldn’t live without her.Good job, Ryan.I can’t be with her. She hurt me and I have a child on the way with her sister, so even though I am mad at her now, I can’t do that to her. I couldn’t even bring myself to tell her about the child because I know how much that’ll affect her.How fucked can this be?The thoughts run in circles in my head as I make my way to my apartment on the other side of the city. If only there was another choice, another option to make …Wait!
Tiara: Are you okay?I look down at the text from Melody sent last night. My eyes are heavy because I’ve not had any sleep and not because I’ve been crying.Or at least that’s what I’ve been telling myself since I got home.Ryan was right. He is a jerk. A big time jerk complete with a ‘J’ in bold caps.How could he . . . kiss me like that and tell me right after, to my face, that he would ‘likely’ get married to Ciara. She is his endgame.I should stop torturing myself like this. Ryan isn’t mine, he has never been and never will be. Now, if only my heart can accept that then perhaps I’ll be okay.Blowing an exasperated breath, I decide to reply Melody’s text because I know she can easily decide to show up here at any moment if I leave her on read one second longer.I text: ‘Yeah. Never been better,’ and hit send.She must have seen through my lie like a detective because a second later she starts typing back.: Bringing him was a bad idea. How bad was it?I shoot back:: It wasn’t a
TiaraHe hit me?This is more than just a hit, this is basically an assault.I don’t need to ask her about who the ‘he’ is in her statement.Panic tearing at my heart, I pull her in and close the door behind us. She is not unconscious but she is limp against my body as I prop her against a couch and grab my phone from my purse with shaking hands.“What are you doing?” her voice is weak, like she is on the verge of passing out.“Calling someone.”“Who?”“I don’t know mum, anyone that can help. Dad, the hospital, anyone.”“No, no,” she stretches a hand to stop me, “not the hospital. It’ll be all over the news.”“That’s what you are worried about now?” I ask her incredulously, “fine, I’ll call my father.”“No, not him either,” she presses a hand to the bridge of her nose to still the bleeding, “he—he’s going to . . . he’ll kill him.”I’ve never seen my father as a violent man, he has always been the quiet type, the calm one, the sense of reason in every conversation. But if she is this w
Tiara“The doctors said you’ll be fine.”Grace nods her bandaged forehead, “I know.” Her tired eyes search the room, “Where is Ciara?”I wonder if she’ll still search the room for her if she knew Ciara deemed it right for Donald to hit her, “She went to get some clothes,” I say instead, “she’ll be back in a while.”“But I’m here,” Melody announces, tramping inside the hospital room with three bars of chocolate in her hand, “and I brought snacks.”I roll my eyes at her. “I don’t think she can eat that, Mel.”“Why not?”I give her my best are-you-kidding-me look, struggling to hide my smile. “Because she is recovering.”“Oh she definitely can eat these,” she plops on a seat beside the bed, opposite me on the other side, “it’s nutritional and besides, I saw a super cute doctor downstairs who gave me the go ahead . . . and his number,” she winks.That gets my mother to chuckle, “Well, it’s a good thing I ended up in the hospital then.”“Definitely,” Melody jokes.“Right. I’ll keep that in
TiaraBeep. Beep. Beep.The sounds are faint, distorted, like somehow, my head is dunked underwater and I am listening to the dim sounds from above.I listen as the time slips by because really I do not have a choice, it is all I can do anyway. My limbs are stiff, my whole body feels numb and my ears seem to be the only thing that is working.At first, I can’t make out the words, it is more like a blur, a light buzz in my state. But as time goes on the words drifts to me, clear as a dream.Hence, I listen to the occasional tearful, “Is she going to be okay?”And the hundreds of masculine, “I’m not leaving her side, you’re gonna have to fucking drag me out and put me on a fucking wheelchair.”And the usual, “If you think I’m gonna let the stupid authorities handle this you must be joking.”And the sporadic, “You’ve got to get up, Tiara. The sunset is wasting every single day.”It takes me a while to figure out the voices and at first it comes as a kind of disturb to my otherwise peacef
TiaraHis eyes bore into Ciara’s as he steps further inside.“Jackson?” I call.“You fucking tricked me!” he spits out, his eyes on Ciara.Why isn’t he looking at me?!Ciara blinks at him. Then at me. Mirroring the same confused expression on my face.“What are you doing here?”“What the fuck do you mean?”“I mean, you’re supposed to be one state away, back in New York.”“Well, change of plans. They are on their way to Connecticut.”Wait . . . what?!“What?” Ciara voices my thought.Jackson looks exasperated when he says, “Your father. He told them about his properties in Connecticut. You didn’t foresee him ruining our plans when you made this hell of a plan?”Our plan?“What are you talking abou – Jackson?” Confusion is eating away at me and his ignoring me isn’t doing anything to help my state, “What do you mean our plan?”As expected, he ignores me again. “You said YOU WERE FUCKING PREGNANT!” he barks instead, spit flying everywhere.“A slip,” Ciara shrugs, “so what?”“Yeah?” the l
Tiara“What happened to you?” I ask her.Ciara has gone unnaturally silent in the few minutes after she whacked me across the face and I don’t want her to entertain anymore riling thoughts in her head.“Talk to me, Ciara,” I almost cannot recognize my own voice. Blood is spilling from my lips and from a cut in my forehead. My eyes are dazed but I don’t have the time anymore to register my pain and put all these in thoughts.I watch as her lips shift into an unamused smile, “You stole from me, Tee. You’ve been doing it for a long time now you are quite good at it.”“But we can fix—” she snorts, “listen to me, Ciara. Let’s fix this. We can turn this all around. Untie me, let’s go home. We’ll talk about this around a hot cup of coffee and we will forget that this ever happened.”She makes a short barking sound that is between a laugh and a short ‘ha’ sound. “You’d want that don’t you? You’d want all that and more.”“What are you talking about? We can talk about this. And Ryan? He can—”A
RyanMy hand pushes the door to a bedroom open.Empty.Then a bathroom, a guest bedroom, the closet.I hear Melody doing the same all around the house, coming up with the same results as me – nothing.This is the third house we have been to within the span of time I called Grace and now, and we still haven’t found a single thing. Not a single thing to boast of.Grace was panicked when I made the call, frantically begging me to do something, anything, to bring her daughters back. ‘Daughters’ as in plural.I didn’t stop to think about what she meant.The physical manhandling of the cop in New Jersey might get me to jail eventually but for now it seems to be doing more wonders than naught and it didn’t take up to an hour before the sirens filled the air and a search warrant was issued.Tiara James-Lemptons is missing.If the cops are not going to take this serious then they’ll have to deal with the media on their necks 24/7 for the next month. That got their asses moving.I also informed
Tiara“Hello, sister.”My throat tightens as the voice registers in my foggy brain.I blink, trying to block the too bright sun rays away from eyes in that single moment.Ciara moves a bit to her right so that she stands directly in front of the sun streaming through the window, shielding me and revealing her sneering face to me at the same time.I gasp. Somehow, I still held doubt in my head even after I heard her voice. Somehow, I thought I had been hallucinating things. But seeing her confirms that she is really here, and not just some figment of my own imaginations.“Ciara? What the fuck?” I say, even though panic is tearing at my heart.This is wrong.So wrong. Surely, the hit to my head was more than I gave it credit for because now I am seeing things.Because Ciara? Yes she hates my guts but this is just . . . extreme.I try to get up to my feet to meet her gaze because the sun behind her is illuminating her features, blocking it so I know it is her but her face is kind of part
Ryan“How sure are you that this is an assault?” The man in the cop uniform asks Melody. He has a rough beard and a cop moustache that makes him look older than his age and the bored expression on his face is like a slap to my mentality.Melody looks like she is about to shake the shit out of him when she says, “What the fuck do you mean—”“Language, ma’am.” he warns, his eyebrow raised up.“How can you stand there and ask me — how can you – there is blood on the board, dammit!”The man gives her a warning look but doesn’t say anything.She goes on anyway, “The door was left ajar, on a spring night,” she emphasized, “There is blood on the skating board, and the victim is missing. What other evidence could you possibly need?”Immediately we found the door open and we each made rounds to different parts of the house to confirm that Tiara indeed wasn’t there, we decided to call the New Jersey cops to let them know of a possible assault and file a report of a missing person.So far, there
Ryan”Fifty bucks, she fell asleep and forgot to text you,” Jackson comments from the backseat, “I mean she is human after all. We do a lot of things we haven’t done before.”“I’m not taking a bet on the safety of my best friend, Jack,” Melody shoots at him.“Safety? I mean,” Jackson shrugs, “she could literally be asleep right now, and this road trip would all be for nothing. We can just take a swing from here right now to Connecticut. I know a guy with a club that can let us—”Melody shoots daggers at him that shuts him down.He clears his throat. “Have you tried calling her again at least? I mean it’s past dawn now.”True to his words the morning sun is trickling through the open windows into the car, the warm rays, doing nothing to uplift the coldness that has settled in my guts.I’ve forgotten that Jackson asked a question until Melody speaks up again, “She is still not picking up. It’s dawn already, Tee is a morning person. She should have been up by now. And if she isn’t, then
TiaraThe humid smell of mud first hits me.For a second I am led to believe that I am in a very, very dark room. A dark room with no windows and no doors and just the right amount of oxygen.But as my eyes adjust – or in this context – fail to adjust to anything in my line of view, I realize that there is a thick material around my face that covers the entirety of my eyes. It could be sunny out there for all I know.My brain is a mush of uncontrolled thoughts and deafening buzzes and the headache just above my right eye is throbbing in a way that would make the doctors fret. If the doctors saw me now.What the fuck?What happened?The last thing I remember . . .I was in the beach house. Then I went to the beach for a stroll.No, I had gone to take my jacket from the room upstairs. But that is not the last thing I remember.The last thing I remember is me standing right across the threshold in the beach house, pulling the door open because Ryan had rang the doorbell.Wait. . .My hea
Ciara“She is being diagnosed with NPD. It’s not that rare of a case but it is as severe as any other disorder out there, maybe even more.”I remember the conversation like it was yesterday.I was ten years old and I remember being really glad my parents accompanied me to my therapist’s that day. It was one of the trips we went without Tiara and I was super pumped that she had to stay alone with boring old Mrs. Fisher, our live-in sitter at the time.My mother had squinted her eyes at the doctor while my father remained calm like he’ll rather be anywhere else in the world than here, listening to some boring ass therapist.I felt exactly the same way.“What is that?” my mother asked, “What does NPD even mean?”“Well,” my therapist adjusted her glasses like someone about to give a very educated, very important but also very boring lecture. “The word, NPD is an acronym for “Narcissistic Personality Disorder” and it is categorized in most cases by a need for control, and,” she starts tick