After auditioning 45 of the 79 applicants, we ended with a grand total of zero female lead candidates. The other 24 decided against trying after I refused Alex’s dating prospects for the 17(th) time.My throat still hurts from all that yelling.Tired and without any progress, the drama club members grumble in frustration. Alex also looks put-off, but he’s got his arm around me, using me as some sort of PDA squeegee.The club members give us a bit of a stink eye as I try not to self-combust in embarrassment. Hailey does, too, though she’s more playful about it. My phone vibrates as Jonathan start talking about another female lead plan.“‘won’t have anythin to do with him again’ you said. ಠ_ಠ”“shut up”“make me (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻”I prepare to reply to Hailey, but Sophia speaks up, raising her hand. Apparently, Jonathan has been taking suggestions. I wasn’t paying attention—“Well, why not Cynthia?”…But I am now.“I mean, Cynthia and Alex helped us rewrite some of the plot, so she knows the
I keep staring at him, so he continues.“I mean, I’m pretty sure I’m gonna fuck up on stage a few times. Maybe it’ll cover if you freeze up a bit? I dunno, but I won’t leave you hanging up there. We’ll be a team, after all. Besides.”His smile turns sheepish.“I really do want to see you act. If I must be on the same stage as you to see that happen, then let’s do it… I’m pretty sure I’m going to fuck up a few lines though, hah.”Ah.The warmth in my chest and face boils red.…No wonder so many girls fall for him.--- --- ---When I return to the club the next day, I quietly tell Jonathan that I’ll do it.He still announces it to the others immediately after. Hailey grabs onto my arm and squeals with delight.“Aaah, I’m so happy you’ll do it! It’s gonna be great!” She balls her fist excitedly. “Don’t worry, I’ll help you with your lines!”“A-Ah…yeah…sure.”I’m really not sure how a stutterer like me will be able to get through it. At least when I stuttered during performances as a litt
My blood runs cold seeing him there. Anxiety crawls up my throat like a lizard and clings to the back of my tongue, leaving a bad taste in my mouth. I realize Hailey is saying something on the phone, and in my rearview mirror, I see her car approaching.“…Can we…rrr-raincheck?”“Huh?”“Sss-something came up. Let’sss…meet later.”“…I guess so, yeah, we can raincheck. I’m seriously sorry about the sign, Cynthia…”“It’sss okay. Talk to you later. Texss…t. Text me when you get home.”I hang up the phone and wait until Hailey leaves, staring at Oliver. He stands at the door with his hands in his pockets, patiently looking back at me.He had been my guiding light before. Now, seeing him there reminds me of someone else. Someone older, taller…drunker.I get out of my car and head up to the front door. As much as I don’t want to deal with him, he’s not going to keep me from getting into my own house.“Hey, Cynthia,” he greets. He smiles, but I don’t sense any kindness from it.I glance up at
It takes a long while for me to calm down.Alex’s hug helps, but we still spend the rest of our practice time huddled under the table. He only backs off once I first start pulling away from him.“…You alright?”Still unable to speak, I just nod and crawl out from under the table. We both leave its shade, standing still in the room.Alex stares at me for a good minute before he murmurs, scratching at the back of his head.“…If you, uh, want to practice some other time, I’m cool with that.”I nod, feeling too tired to think too much.I turn and stumble over to my phone. Thankfully, I got a sturdy one after the pool incident with my phone insurance. Only some cosmetic scratches…phew.When I check for technical issues, my screen shows more messages from that mystery number. I quickly block it, deleting all the messages.“…Rrr-raincheck.”“Yeah… Later.”Without much of a response, I leave the room and head home.I never got any good sleep last night, so maybe I can get some at home now.…I
With their most recent win, the Chillers are just a few games away from qualifying for the playoffs and Division I nationals. The Bernard Saints were one of their greatest adversaries—which, I highly doubted that, considering how the Chillers swept them.But Alex sat me down and taught me how the point system works, showing me past games. No, the Bernard Saints were a high-quality team. The Chillers were just better.Still, even after surpassing their greatest opponents, there’s others that could give them a run for their money. Therefore, the Chillers amp up the difficulty of their training.I’m not sure how he does it, practicing hockey four days a week and still finding time for our play. The coach even moved practice to early morning rather than after school. Sure, it’s to reduce other scheduling conflicts, but 5 AM is still so early.Worried he won’t keep it together, I decide to try to help. Maybe if I make him some snacks, he can eat them and stay energized? So, I use some of m
“Uhm, so. After this sss-season, you’re expected to play. In the playoffs?”“Yeah,” Alex hums. His hands are still wrapped with bandages, though he seems to be able to move them just fine. The bandage on his nose may come off soon as well, though he flinches when he scrunches his nose.Ever since the most recent game, we’ve been hanging out in school more often. If we pass each other, we might even walk to class. It’s strange, not taking the back hallways like I usually do, but the natural light coming in the windows makes things look brighter.“We’ve got a few more weekend games, but playoff should start a bit after April 1(st). We’ve got this, though.” He grins, flexing his arm. “We don’t go down easy, and that last fight won’t stop us.”“Hmm… Just be carrr—hmmh. Careful to not, uhm. Get too hurt.”“Yeah, yeah, no worries. I’ll be safe. Ah, this is my turn here.”With an easy we didn’t have before, he pulls me in and kisses the top of my head. Despite feeling my heartbeat ramp up im
“Wh…at. What are you talking about?”Her hand slams into the locker door beside my head, making me flinch.“Don’t play dumb with me, bimbo. I’ve figured it out. I know all about your little game plan.”When I don’t say anything in return, she scoffs.“I don’t know why you can’t just stick to one boy. I knew it. From the time you went to that New Years party, you’ve been gunning for Oliver since then, haven’t you? No…even earlier than that.”“That’sss not what—”“But you ended up with Alex. Alex, of all people. But you’re still so fuckin’ unhappy, huh? Have to try to steal my boyfriend, too?”I feel irritation bubbling in my chest. And usually, I would just let it go, not wanting to bother with people who don’t listen.But I’m very done with this mess, and I don’t want anything more to do with this. So, if I want it done… I have to nip it in the bud myself.“Nooo, captain of the hockey team isn’t enough for a little drama dweeb who can’t even speak right. You have to—”“You’re…the one.
It took me a while to calm down enough and gather my energy together to move from that spot. But Alex spoke to me the entire time, right until he, miraculously, ran out of things to say for the moment. We ended up not hanging up, just breathing on both sides of the phone until I got home.I’ve been sleeping a bit better recently despite anxiety with the performance coming up. Getting home that day and imagining Alex talking as I started falling asleep…uhm. As embarrassing as it is to say, I can’t deny that may be a part of why.Anyway, I get to school the next day with a fresher mind than I’ve had for the last few.It’s good that I am since the upcoming play is only three days away. Thankfully, it’s on a night Alex doesn’t have a hockey game, so he’ll be free to play his part. Still, seeing all the effort he puts into his own interests and mine…If only Alex wasn’t a bit of a mindless flirt, he’d be a really good boyfriend.I think I’m mature enough to admit that.He’d be pretty good