When you, a nerd, get stood up by your ex and wait all night in a bar on New Year's EveThat's when you meet the hottest hockey team captain who asked you to pretend to be his date so he could dump his latest girlfriend.When you're being pestered by your ex to get back together, he shows up and tells your ex to fuck off.Your ex says, I know this is just a deal and you can't possibly like her.He (kisses you in front of everyone): Deal, Like this?
view moreThe backlit mirrors in Mier'Chelie's don’t flatter me at all. I look like a rat!
Weeks of planning, and my cardigan sleeves seem a bit long. The headband I put on is doing nothing to tame my wavy hair. Are Chuck Taylor knockoffs okay for here?
Still…maybe Oliver will notice the effort.
Speaking of which, has he seen my text messages? It’s already 9:43. If we eat and leave on time, we can get to the New Year’s firework show…
“Lookin 4ward to u gettin here”—30 minutes ago, unread.
I scrunch my eyes tightly. I worked hard to learn how eyeliner works, so I don’t want to mess it up, but…
“Keep it cool, Cynthia… Just…two more minutes.”
I already have a text reminder alarm set. There’s no need to bombard him.
It’s okay. Just two more minutes.
When I start opening the bathroom door—
“Don’t go!!”
—I almost smack myself in the face with it.
Who’d scream like that here of all places? I got my answer when I peeked out the door.
Jessica Parthow. She looks absolutely stunning in her deep blue dress. The dance team really does wonders for her legs.
The guy she’s holding onto doesn’t seem to notice or care.
Alex Hewlett: hockey team captain, satisfactory student, and notoriously unserious playboy. My Oliver waxes poetic about him constantly. Their current season is a huge success so far because of him.
I…don’t really care about Alex. Sure, he looks like a fashion catalog photo made real: light slacks, tucked-in black dress shirt, clean sneakers.
But from what I know, he isn’t one for commitment. A fling-only person, never dated anyone that I know of.
Though Jessica’s, uh, not gotten the picture. I heard she texted someone, demanding they “stop trying to fuck my boyfriend.” From his phone no less.
Those two are still fussing so…I’ll just wait in here for now—
My heart jumps into my throat when my phone starts blaring.
Ah. 9:45.
Panic rushes through me as I try to turn it off, but I can’t get a handle on it before the bathroom door gets shoved open. I stumble back and look up.
It’s Jessica, Immaculate, and furious. Her five-foot-seven seems mountainous to my five-foot-fourteen.
Meeting her gaze is…too much. I try to slip past her, but her hand ensnares my shoulder.
“Who the hell are you?” Jessica hisses, her nails digging in as I wince. “You were listening to us just now, weren’t you? Took a video to laugh with your bitch friends?”
“Uh—”
Before I answer, a large hand grabs my other shoulder and pulls me away. I freeze up, getting smushed against someone’s pecs.
“Hey babe,” a saccharine voice says. “What took you so long?”
…Oliver doesn’t call me ‘babe’. This body is too big, too.
When I look up, Alex’s warm brown eyes meet mine. He winks before looking back toward Jessica.
“…What’s that look for? You know I’m not one to date. I just wanted to have fun, but… It’s not anymore. See you.”
Then, I’m being ushered away. My ears are too full of cotton to fully understand what Alex is saying to me.
Were his hands always this big? This strong? He’s like a vice.
I only realize how far we’ve gone when a gust of wind blows against my face… When did we get down the street?
“...Okay, she’s leaving. Thank fuck—”
I squirm out of his arms immediately, nearly braining myself on the snow-dusted ground. When I shoot him a look I hope is intimidating, he just raises his hands like he’s confronting a scared deer.
“Hey, yeah, sorry about that. Jess was jumping down my throat.” I feel his eyes trail up and down my body. “You were a great help, though. Can I have your number? I’ll make this up to you.”
It takes me a moment to process what he said, then irritation bubbles in my chest. Didn’t he just diss Jessica using me?
“...No need.”
I stumble past him, heading back to the restaurant. Whatever, I’m going back anyway. I just want to wait for Oliver.
However, his sneakers catch up beside me.
“I mean it, I’m really sorry about that! For real… Are you even waiting for someone?” He lets out a snort. “It’s almost 10. No qualified boyfriend would be late on a day like this.”
I stop in my tracks and turn on him. With some effort, I forcefully unclench my jaw.
“Someone who uses random girls on a whim should keep their mouth shut. He’s a thousand times better than you.”
Alex’s eyebrows rise up as he gives me another once-over.
“...You’re spicier than you look.” He starts smirking, stuffing his hands in his pockets. “Redmond High, right? Do I know your perfect Prince Charming?”
“Oliver is—”
Ah.
My six-month anniversary is today, but almost no one knows. Oliver doesn’t like school gossip, and I’m happy as long as he is. But…
I cut myself off, glancing up at Alex, hoping he doesn’t know the name. But of course he does, thick black eyebrows raised in surprise.
His grin turns playful, so I try making my expression as steely as possible
“Oliver Oakley? Yeah…great asset to the team. A real fun guy.” He gasps, and I jolt slightly. “Speaking of fun, Gunther’s throwin' a party while his folks are out. Go drop by. You might see something fun.”
…The winter air firmly reminds me I’m just in a cardigan. I wrap my arms around myself and decide to flee instead of wrapping my mind around his suggestion.
Alex calls after me. “Remember! 8293 Harvey Way!”
I don’t answer him. There’s no need to.
— — —
I text Oliver at 9:52.
Then 10:10.
10:35.
10:55.
By 11 PM, I’m standing in the snow outside the now closed restaurant, my half-eaten breadsticks in a to-go box under my arm. My stomach grumbles with hunger.
Did…Oliver just stand me up?
No, he couldn’t have. Maybe he was just occupied.
Like, anything could’ve happened. His phone battery could’ve died or he could’ve gotten into a car accident and couldn’t reply. Or maybe…
No.
If Oliver was going to a party, he would tell me. I don’t need to act out-of-control like Jessica. Given, Oliver and I actually are dating, but still.
…Well. It’s not like I can’t drop by. I don’t know Gunther super well, but maybe he knows where Oliver is.
Checking is fine…right?
I’ll just see if he’s there, that’s all.
Upon arrival, I immediately pick out his car among the others.
The lights inside and the music are…a lot. There’s so many people, I’m getting squished just by stepping inside. It kinda burns, somehow.
As I stumble onto the tile, I find Gunther there, a lanky brunette slumped in a chair with an off-brand booze bottle limp in his hand.
“Hey…”
Gunther blinks at me slowly like I’m a mirage. Maybe I look like one. My hair’s all over the place now.
I try to drag words from the drying concrete in my brain.
“Uhm…ah… Oliver. Do you, uhm… Know… Where he is?”
He squints at me. “Whut?”
The music’s too loud. So I try speaking up, but he doesn’t hear me. I try again, and no dice.
“I said! Do you know where Oliver is?!”
My throat feels raw as I scream. There’s sweat rolling down my back.
“Ohh. Damn, you didn’t have to yell,” Gunther huffs. “He’s snoozing upstairs.”
Relief floods me immediately.
Where’s the stairs? Just find the stairs. The bedroom’s upstairs.
When I catch a glimpse of the first step, I crawl my way through the crowd. I just want them off of me.
Getting up to the second floor…
It’s quieter, I think. I can’t hear past the buzzing downstairs, the ringing in my ears, and my own panting.
But I know he’s here. I can feel him, my guiding light. Oliver’s here.
I know he’s behind the first door I find. Surely he’s resting.
I’ll ask him why he didn’t answer my texts later. I just…want to see him.
Know that he’s safe. Just to calm down before I head home.
The voices downstairs are counting.
I open the door quietly, not wanting to wake him.
But he’s already up.
The voices are cheering.
Oliver’s indeed in bed.
He’s laying under the covers, kissing a girl with naked shoulders.
The house is a mess because I’ve been in town visiting my mom for a few days. I knew it would be, which is why I returned early in the morning, so I could clean up before I had to begin my day.Things aren’t exactly how I expected when I walk in. Yes, the house is a mess, but Alex is scrambling to clean up the kitchen. I drop my bag and look around at the array of clothes and shoes thrown around the living room.“Hey, babe… I really was going to have this cleaned up before you got home.”“I see that.”He smiles at me and I can’t help but forgive him. The problem is that he knows that, and someday that charm might run out. Except with my luck it won’t.“When are you leaving?”“I’m going to hang around a couple more days.”“That’ll be nice,” I say as I give him a hello kiss.We’ve been married for almost two years now, and even with our duties, I feel like we’re in our honeymoon stage. I’m every bit as in love with him now as I was when we first mated, and I wouldn’t change any part of
My senior year is a whirlwind. I’m in all advanced classes and spend a lot of time studying. When I graduate, I will have a Bachelor’s of Creative Arts and Writing. That was my Epiphone. Just because I’ll be required to love among and lead my pack, doesn’t mean I can’t still express my creativity.In fact, my senior project is the play I began writing as a 17-year-old human with intense complexes and assassins on her heals. The story follows my own, sometimes a little too closely, but it seems like the perfect way to blend my two lives together.Alex is supportive. So is my pack. When I approach the Council with the idea of working on the side as a freelance writer, they are supportive so long as the pack and our home remains anonymous. I tell them I will work under a pen name, and when I release my first play, Furry Butterfly, I do so under a pseudonym.It turns out to be a success, and the money I receive allows me to conquer my first project as Luna.That summer, I officially join
Right before finals my freshman year, I receive the dreaded call. “It’s Michael,” Alex says. His breathing is loud, erratic. “He passed away last night.”Of course, there’s nothing I can do over the phone. I borrow Hailey’s car and leave that very night.When I get there, it is after dark and Alex is at Michael’s house, sitting in the kitchen with Rita. When I walk in, it’s quiet. They’re not talking or doing anything aside from staring at the table.They look up at me and I see their sorrow. I run over to Alex and wrap my arms around him, absorbing his sobs of mourning as I cry into his shoulder.I hear Rita sniffle, and I let go long enough to cross the table and give her a hug. “I’m so sorry!” I whisper into her ear. “I’m so sorry…”That night is when Alex and I take our physical relationship to another level. I wanted to make him feel better, if only for a little while.When we get back to his house, I follow him into his room and lock the door behind us. I don’t care if his paren
I plan on visiting during my fall break. Mom thinks I have a trip for drama, so she’s not expecting me. I hate lying to her, but it really is for her own good.The following week leading up to our opening night is stressful. The play only runs for two weekends, but everything has to be perfect for the first show. I scramble to make last-minute changes to costumes and learn a few lines that just don’t seem to be sticking.Which is what makes opening night more stressful when Alex and Mom both show up with flowers. Talk about feeling loved…and feeling the pressure to perform!Alex plants a big kiss on me and Hailey, who plays another one of the teens, ooh’s and ah’s over us. So does Mom, and I’m starting to wonder which one of us she likes more.Alex and Mom sit with Lenard through the show. I peek out from the back curtain to find their seats, so I know not to look there. I can’t risk catching one of them smile at me and throwing me off. Tonight has to be perfect because I’ve worked so
The next day really is my birthday. Mom makes me a cake and we celebrate in the morning over coffee. Then we spend the day in Marona, a nearby hippie town with awesome shopping, and Mom splurges on a few new outfits for me to take to school.I’ve realized I’m grateful for every moment. When I was at the Ayzena base I was grateful for their hospitality, when I’m with Alex I’m grateful for his love and attention—not to mention his body! Now that I’m with Mom, I’m grateful I ended up with her. In spite of our hardships, I’ve realized she endured everything for my sake. There’s no greater love than that.And today is a great day. We share food and laughs in a way we’ve never been able to before. It makes me determined to help take care of her when I’m able, so we can spend more time like this when we’re together. Away from drama, having fun.Alex comes by later that day and brings me a present. He was sweet to give me the day alone with my mother, though it helps that I reminded him he’ll
Over the next couple of days, things go back to normal. At least as normal as they can be now. I’m not able to hide my appetite or my newfound desire for meat. I tell Mom it must be my hormones.The stutter is becoming difficult to hide, mostly because I don’t want it anymore. I’m finally free of the one thing that placed the wrong kind of spotlight on me and when I finally get the chance to be free of it, I have to fake it again.I just have to remind myself that it’s temporary.Alex and I meet Hailey and Lenard for a double date, and it’s like nothing has changed.Except Alex isn’t shy about public displays of affection, though I wonder how much of it is a put-on for shock value. It works.We meet at the diner down the street from the school. As soon as I walk in, I can smell grease and meat, and my stomach starts to rumble. “I have to hide my appetite at home so Mom doesn’t get suspicious,” I whisper to Alex, who can’t help but cackle.I nudge him in his rock-hard belly. “It’s not
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