LOGINJACKSON
As soon as her lips touched mine, I was a ruined man. And yet that was the moment I came alive. It felt like a light was turned on in a room that had been dark for so long. I felt warm in all the places I never thought warmth could reach.
When I touched her body, I had to fight my hands to remain still. She would think me pathetic if my hands were to shake like a boy still wet behind the ears. So I gritted my teeth and forced my hands to stay still while I came undone, finally touching her.
In my head, there have been countless scenarios where I had slowly undressed her and touched her, but nothing, and I mean fucking nothing, prepared me for the way she looked and felt.
Her thick thighs rub together. Her full breasts with those perky nipples that tasted like sin and salvation. Her lips tasted like I'd found a piece of heaven. And her round, soft stomach that made my dick throb painfully.
I had to force myself not to cum like a pathetic idiot.
But a pathetic idiot is what I've become. It was an unexpected fall, but the ground was very much comfortable where I was.
“You’re perfect, Siri.”
If that wasn't the fucking understatement of the century, then I didn't know what was. But I was no poet, so words like “perfect” were all I had.
Her eyes glossed over with that emotion and vulnerability I know she wasn't aware were bright in her eyes.
“Then why say it like it’s painful?”
“Because it fucking is.”
It was painful holding back because I didn't want to overwhelm her and watch her run away from me.
We were finally doing this. After all the push and pull, we were finally doing this, and I didn't want to chase her away with emotions I have no control over.
So yes, it was painful because I wanted those emotions to bleed out and melt into her skin.
Fucking hell, listen to me. Since when did I think like a lovesick poet? But that doesn't matter right now. What matters is that I wanted her to feel those emotions instead of hearing them, because words were just that.
But with my heavy emotions pressed against her skin, caressing it, she would know I meant them, and wouldn't associate me with whatever had happened in the past.
But no rush.
We have time. We have nothing but time.
I finally managed to peel my lips away from her stomach and went lower, kissing her waist, her hips. I went even lower. I could see it in her eyes: she didn't expect me to plant my face just above her core.
Her eyes went wide. “W-w-what are you doing?”
“What does it look like I'm doing, Siri?” I asked softly as I knelt between her spread legs, grabbing her thighs and spreading them even more apart. I placed a kiss on her inner thigh, and she rewarded me with a delicious shiver.
“Y-you’re about to… to… to…”
I scoffed softly, and she shivered again when my breath passed through her core. “Yes, love. I’m about to do exactly that.”
My eyes dropped, and all air rushed out of my lungs as I was face to face with her core. And what a sight it was. She was wet. Completely soaked, and her pink bubs pulsed for me. Her clit was already swollen.
Fuck, I was dying to get a taste of her. I couldn't wait any longer. But before I could go in, she grabbed my hair so tight, my scalp burned.
“Y-you can’t!”
I raised my eyes to hers, annoyed. “Why the bloody hell not?!”
Her face was the color of a tomato. More red, even. “Because… because it’s dirty, okay!”
I shook my head. “I would still lick you over if you were covered in mud.”
I went in again. And she stopped me. Bloody again! With how hard she was gripping my hair, I might go bald before this ends.
“What is your bloody problem, Siri?!” I snapped, raising my eyes to hers. “Let a man feast!”
“My bloody problem, Jackson,” she yelled back, mimicking my accent, “is that you can't do that!”
“And why bloody not?!”
“Because you just bloody can't!”
We stared at each other, my face still between her legs. I could smell her, and she smelled so delicious. She was going to deny me this luxury? I knew she was cruel, but not to this extent.
“Just… maybe next time?" she whispered.
The mention of a next time had me off my knees in a second. I was back on the couch, and she stared up at me with those eyes I will give up everything for.
“I will hold you to that, darling.”
She swallowed, nodding once.
I grabbed her hand, pulling her off the couch without warning, and she gasped. I turned her in a blink, pressing her back to my chest, and making her kneel on the couch, with her hands planted at the top. I knelt behind her, and we were completely pressed together, no space between our bodies, my dick resting on her ass.
My arms trailed down hers, to her fingers where I interlocked them with mine. She turned her head and stared at me, her swollen lips parted, her eyes heavy.
“We’re about to bite the forbidden fruit, my darling,” I whispered against her ear, and she shivered again, her breath hitching. “There will be no going back after that.”
Her tongue snaked out and wet her lips, and my eyes dropped to them. “I-I know.”
I hummed as I let go of her hands, grabbed her ass, spread her cheeks apart, and positioned myself at her entrance. She inhaled sharply, her eyes dropping in a sexy way that made me think of her as a siren.
“I won’t let you out of my net, Siri,” I growled, my voice deep.
She lifted her chin, the look of defiance still so bright in her eyes. “Shut up, and fuck me, Jackson.”
I chuckled darkly. “My pleasure, darling.”
I slammed into her in one thrust, and our moans echoed in my walls.
Yeah, fuck Toria and her stupid advice. Fuck that happy ending nonsense. Sure, I do want a happy ending with him. I want a happy beginning, middle, and ending with Jackson. All of that and more! Damn it, I had even been thinking of the perfect future together with him. Yes—and fuck you—I’ve been thinking of going somewhere with him, getting a house, three dogs, and maybe one cat. We could live like that for a few years, then get married, and decide if we wanted kids. I'd already mapped out the perfect future, the perfect ending.So yeah… Use him? USE him? How on God’s green earth can I use him when I was in love with him? I was madly in love with that man, and it made me realize that I was never in love with Michael. No. No, I was just in love with the attention and the idea of love, the idea that someone finally wants me. But this painful shit with Jackson? This soul-crashing devastation? Yeah, this was love. This was love in its purest, fucked up form.So how was I going to us
“I thought you might be gone already,” Toria said as we settled into my hotel room. “Jackson already booked my flight,” I said, opening a beer. “I leave in two days.”“Hmm. So what are you going to do till then? Stay cranked up in here?”“Probably.”“I could show you around, you know.”I thought about it for a second and shook my head, sipping my drink. “Thank you, but no.”I had thought about leaving and just going to tour on my own, but every time I thought about the possibility that I might run into him out there, I shook off that thought. Maybe I would have seen him with his hand around another woman’s waist, laughing with the boys and acting like that night didn't happen. But seeing him on screen tonight, I don't think any of that might have happened. I wanted to ask Toria what happened and why he looked that way, but then I might sound like I care, which I very much do, and I wanted to stay cool and keep up this nonchalant act until I was out of here.And so I sipped my drink
SIRIHe… lost. I stared at the TV screen in my small hotel room, my eyes wide, hands squeezed together and pressed to my chest.“He lost,” I whispered it out loud like it would make sense if I did so. I told myself I wasn't going to watch the game, that I would stay away from my screen and just wait for my flight back home two days from now, but I couldn't. I couldn't let the chance of seeing him, even though it was from a screen, slip away. As soon as his team had skated onto the ice and the camera zoomed in on them, my eyes had found him immediately, and I knew something was wrong. His skin was too pale, his eyes looked too sunken, and he kept flexing his wrists over and over, to the point I was sure everyone in the arena must have noticed. And I could have sworn that he was trembling. The game started, and it was even worse. Everything about the way he moved, to the way he could no longer hide his trembling, was wrong. It filled my heart with dread and panic. I couldn't relax a
PRESENTThe smoke of that cigar, laced with a chocolate scent, burned into my nose even though he was across the street. The scent was the same: the cigar lit, resting on his lips, lifted in a smile. A small smile, soft and gentle. Not like that frightening smile he had on his face that night that still sends a chill down my spine. Elijah M’Call still looked the same even seven years later. His black hair was slicked back from his face, dotted with gray. His grey eyes were wrinkled at the corners from age. His shoulders were still broad beneath his tailored suit, and black leather gloves covered his hands.He still looked and dressed the same. Nothing had changed.After that night, I had cut every tie with this man. I made sure I never heard a word from him or received a single penny. I moved into Jacob’s house, and his mother accepted me without a single complaint, letting me stay until I could rent my own place. I didn't speak to my mother for two years after that. She came to my
CONTENT WARNING: This chapter contains references to domestic abuse and may be triggering to some readers. Reader discretion is advised. ~.~“I can think of a few things that can make you quit hockey,” my father said, his voice relaxed, but his face was filled with hell. He stood chest to chest with me, and I fought every instinct screaming at me to lower my eyes, to pull back. I fought them and stood perfectly still, not letting that dark look intimidate me.“What?” I spat. “Are you going to pay the coach to kick me out of the team? Then I'll just find another team to join.”“Jackson, please,” my mother whispered, and that just made my fists clench harder. Why was she calling me back and not her husband? He was the one threatening to take my dream away from me! My hopes for a better future, and still I was the one being called back? Did she really think I would just roll over and accept this bullshit? Bloody no. “That is way beneath me, Jackson,” he said in a low voice, acting li
SEVEN YEARS AGOThe sun had long since set, and the neighborhood was dark by the time I strolled in through the back door, my shoes tied together by their laces and hanging around my neck, my hands shoved into my pockets. Hopefully my parents were asleep by now, and I wouldn't have to deal with either of them. It was exhausting to look into their eyes these days and act like everything was fine when I harbored a little bit of hatred for my father. Okay, maybe it was more than a little bit, but I won’t tell if you don’t. I spent time at Jacob’s house long after practice, then came home and lied through my teeth, saying the coach sucked us dry with practice, which is why I was so late.You can’t blame me. The atmosphere in this house was depressing, and hearing my father whistle while he smoked his cigar, acting like all was right and fair in the world, was pissing me off when I could see my mother was losing weight, when I could clearly see she was losing her shine. She just needed







