Emma's POV I changed out of my already stained towels. Chase just got them from a fancy women's store, online, about two days ago. I felt bad that it had to get ruined, but it was all part of my healing. The doctor said I was gonna be bleeding for about four days. After bawling my eyes out again on Chase's shoulders, I logged my tired body back into the bathroom to wash up. I was weak as fuck, and definitely worse of emotionally. I put a sanitary pad on and then went to bedI didn't think it was gonna be easy sleeping, so it was not a surprise when all that closing my eyelids did was usher in the horrible memories. I began to think of something I thought I'd cast to the back of my mind a long time ago. Every now and then, I felt Chase's hand on my body. It was hard to tell him that the hands I once died for, the hands I once fantasized about being wrapped in had started to irritate me. The day went by slowly, I subconsciously looked at the digital clock on the dressing ta
Emma's POVHow the call ended was a bit strange. I didn't know why my mom had to cut it off. As much as I wanted to dash to Mark's, I wasn't feeling up to it and I had started to feel gnawing pains in my belly. I concluded my mom was gonna be alright and left it at that. When I called her, I wasn't expecting to hear her say those things she said, but they sure were what I needed to hear, in retrospection. Maybe it was better after all. My raw maternal instincts were mourning the baby, but a baby wasn't really what I needed. And she was right about the other part too. Chase and I were going to college in less than a month. She said two letters came from different schools for him, it was a lot more than a punch in my gut that he applied to two schools, none of which I applied to. I thought the plan was to be together. Apparently, I didn't mean so much to him. As I held my head in my hand, I cried to the God I don't know if I believed in. I'd been cheated so badly in my ver
Chase's POV. I was still very much haunted from how I reacted when Emma told me about it. Every time I saw her wear a painful look on her face I remembered how it mirrored the look she wore when she told me. The sleep at night was somewhat chaotic. She had a bout of nightmares. I was scared to my bones when I heard her scream the first time, but it was rather a relief when I saw she was still asleep. It happened three times more, and every single time, I got less scared than I was before. “How are you?” I asked. I'd been staring at her for over an hour, when the day was still a bit dark. “Better.” She replied, turning from me and facing the wall. I thought today was gonna be different. Maybe she'd be warmer, calmer, more composed. I had the most beautiful smile on, ready to make her world different from what it used to be. “I loved watching you sleep.” I said, like I'd done every morning since we'd been together. Emma's smile was a bit shy, or cold, frosty, I didn't w
Emma's POV I wasn't feeling up to talking to Chase when I woke up in the morning. That's not to deny that I didn't find his efforts cute. He sounded so happy, like if I stayed around him too much, he'd rub off on me. The pancakes he made, made their way into my nose, but my head was feeling a bit woozy, I was in fact trying to catch my balance. I didn't know that was enough to piss him off. I looked from the window opposite his bed, I could not see him. Meaning he didn't go so far. The pancakes were making me extra hungry, but I felt nasty, and weak. I stripped, half hoping Chase came in at that exact time. I took my time, taking my clothes off one after the other. I tarried a bit, waiting in sexy poses. I pinched myself. I was beginning to get too delusional, even for myself. I walked into the bathroom majestically. The blood flow had reduced, and for that I was grateful. Taking my time, I lathered my body carefully with a body scrub I'd just gotten. I felt fresh, diffe
Emma's POV. I did one last outfit check before heading down to Lily's. It wasn't much, but it was pretty, cute, demure. I took these stairs carefully, gently, just so if Chase was around, he would not hear me come down. It wasn't exactly like I was running from him, I just wasn't in the mood for any explanation. I just wanted to do what I wanted to do and be happy. The front door was left ajar, which was quite unusual, but not strange, since he was still somewhere around. “Here she comes.” Chase beamed. They had just broken their hug, and he and Lily were looking in my direction. I almost wobbled under their gaze. Their faces were so smiley, so expectant, I was tempted to look back to confirm if there was something else that had their attention. “You look so fucking pretty.” Lily said, hugging me and planting a kiss on my forehead. “Thank you.” I croaked. I was pinching myself, struggling to remind myself that the hug I just witnessed them break meant nothing. That the
Lily's POV Emma and I were gonna have premium fun, and I was gonna make sure of it. I didn't cancel my trip to Berlin to sulk and cry with Emma. “Do we go on our spree first?” I asked her. Her face looked conflicted when she got into the car after she and Chase's little pep talk. I hated to see my girl like that. “Yeah.” She confirmed. Good to know we were still on track. I need some summer dresses and sunshades for Berlin myself, and maybe boots too. “What's on your mind?” I asked her. She looked like she wasn't really with me, in the car. “I'm scared.” She said, “Why?” I asked her. “For a lot of reasons.” She said, “Start with the one on your mind now.” I said. “Everything.” She said, She was rubbing her hands furiously. “Everything is wrong.” “That can't be true.” I said. “You have a life many are only jealous of.” I said. “You're just trying to make me feel better. It would have worked when I was younger and dumber, but I'm smart now, Lily.” Her
Emma's POV At that point, it felt like I was the universe's favorite plaything. While I was talking to Lily in the car, I had a weird feeling. That feeling that comes when you just know something is about to happen. I shrugged it off. Maybe it was the prospect of being in Berlin, in the next twenty four hours. We entered and got shopping, like we were supposed to. I left my phone in the glove box, mainly cause I didn't want any distractions. Little did I know that my biggest distraction was yet ahead. I said his name out loud, even though I didn't want to. Lily and I tried to hide behind some clothes, not only was Ur too late, because he had seen us. He was also headed in our direction. “Seems to me like this is the part where I leave you.” Lily whispered through her teeth as she forced a smile. “Fuck you.” I cursed Lily as I straightened up my gown. “He looks like he's about to do that.” She joked, and buried herself in being animatedly in love with some scarves we
Kevin's POV I decided to shop in a Chanel store cause my guy, Fred, recommended it. We were both on probation, but were in the top ten highest earning population in Arizona. It was a hybrid role, and I was gonna make my first appearance in two days. I worked hard to prepare my presentation, slides and stuff, and I was ready to take them by storm. I didn't drop out if Hugh school few dates to my final exams to be a fucking loser. As we walked through the store, I reminded myself that I could very much afford it. Afterall, I'd moved back to the city my family and I left less than a year ago due to high rent. I got a place somewhere in the high rise corners of the city. I swore to enjoy life, and that was exactly what I was doing. Fred had two girls over the night before, and was nice enough to offer me one. We went at it raw and hard. She's the only girl I'd been with since Emma. I'd become so much of a loser that I got her number from Fred. I was gonna hit my one night fling b
Emma's POV “We are both hurt. I think it's better we realize that and stop shaming the other person. Emma, you're just as damaged as I am.” Chase said. “That's not rocket science, Chase. Isn't this how you leave everyone you've been with?” I asked, “Broken and damaged?” “That's unfair, Em. You keep skipping the fact that there are always two sides to anything.” He replied to me. “You think I did, Chase?” I looked at him in his sinfully sexy blue eyes I still hadn't gotten an antidote to, not even the anger I felt, “All I did was allow you. I made you do all you did to me. In a way, I even enabled you.” “That's untrue, and you know it.” He replied to me. “I've talked about this, over and over. In my head and out of it, and it's still the same conclusion I reach.” I responded to him. “If ‘out of your head’ in any way refers to the bastard up there, I don't think I want to hear it.” I replied to her. “You've gotta get over yourself, Chase.” I said. “There's life
Chase's POV “You're still here, Em. It means you're interested.” I said. “I'm not comfortable here.” She said in a low voice. “I'd be in the garage, meet me there.” I said. “Maybe this is your time to show how low you regard me.” I let go of her hand which I had in mine, doing it both lightly and seductively. I knew I walked with such swagger, such essence that couldn't betray how scared I felt deep inside. Maybe she'd realize that I wasn't worth shit, and just go upstairs to meet her little boyfriend. I sat in my favorite of my dad's lot, the black mustang I saved Emma's ring in. That particular car had so many memories. I wanted to be in. I checked the time on my Patek, it was a few minutes to midnight. The estate gate was gonna be locked by 00:00, and if I couldn't make it out by then, I'd be stuck with Em and that bastard. 23:53, I had begun to get antsy. It'd be really unfortunate if I left, and Em eventually came down. I kept telling myself to calm down and b
Emma's POV “Can I trust you?” I asked Chase. I was mentally drained. Having played the good daughter throughout the anniversary, I wanted to catch my breath. Little did I know I had just been walking straight into Chase’s arms. “You know you can, Em.” He said, enthusiastically. “I'd hold your secret against me, Em. I wouldn't even tell myself.” His eyes mirrored mine, tired, hunger of the soul, and exhaustion. I couldn't believe that it was the same person who acted like I didn't exist last night. “I don't know where I stand with Kevin, really.” I said what I'd forbidden myself to. I made a deal with my mind to never say it. Just so I didn't believe it. The more I said something, the more I was forced to believe. “Start from the point where you left me, Em. I want to know it all.” He said, looking downI hated when Chase had that pensive look on his face. It felt like he was just a slight provocation away from murder. “After us,” I started, my mind was a bit foggy
Chase's POV “What did you do that for?!” Emma yelled after landing me a slap to the cheek. “I already said I wasn't gonna let you go.” I replied stubbornly. “Chase, my arm is hurting.” She cried, referring to the arm I'd been holding. I felt like a nasty person. Maybe it was the universe providing answers to the question I'd asked so many times, “Am I not good enough for her?” Well, I now knew I was too violent, too relentless, too impulsive, I rarely rethought my decisions, I bent everything to my will, things had to suit me, always. And those were all the things Emma stood against. “Emma, I'm a damaged guy, and I know it's really not your job to fix me. I'm a sorry project who should've belonged to my late mom and my dad who's now a happily remarried man. I get it. No one wants a project. But this is me swearing that I'd never hurt you, Em. I've learned. I do better for myself these days.” I said, frantically. Emma was rubbing her arm where I grabbed her, a sorry rem
Chase's POV. “It's not good that I'm too close to you, Chase.” Emma cried. Her eyes were already tearing up, and her face wet. Her rosy cheeks were beginning to peek from beneath the light make-up. “Why, Emma?” I asked her, letting my mouth say all the things my heart felt. “Am I so bad?” I asked. “I never said anything like that.” She answered. “So what is it?” I asked, exhausted. “Why do you want to be away from me so bad? Why do you treat me with such a long spoon? You can't deny missing me, Em. I see it in your eyes. What is holding you back?” I dared reach for her trembling hands, and she didn't pull away. It was a good thing. “Chase, I just still find it so hard to process. I'd rather think about things that hurt me, than process the whole thing. The past year has been the most tumultuous part of my life yet. I'm so fucking drained, I just need peace.” She said, “And you think that description doesn't fit me.”I asked, against my better reasoning. I then remi
Chase’s POV“I didn't think you'd be here.” She said,“I could say the same.” I replied to her Emma was the last person I thought who'd want to catch a break from the ceremony.She was at the center of it all, and really did well at her job of role playing a perfect daughter.“It's too much.” She replied with a low voice.“What is?” I asked, clearing my throat. “The atmosphere.” She explained, kicking the grass in her stilettos. Her legs looked like they must've been hurting. “Here.”I gave way for her to sit on her favorite swing. I could never take that away from her. “Thank you.” Emma was being her generic self, the side that she showed everyone else. Shy and contained. But I didn't like that. I liked that Emma I fell for, headlong. “It's nothing to Chase’s POV “I didn't think you'd be here.” She said, “I could say the same.” I replied to her Emma was the last person I thought who'd want to catch a break from the ceremony. She was at the center of it all, and really
Chase's POV I wished I could remain busy throughout the day. A time to rest meant a time to think. I was under the same roof as Emma, like I'd been wanting, but we were yet so far apart. The flowers were an ill thought decision, but I had to do something. Being in the same house with Emma for over three days was beginning to mess with my mental health. “You shouldn't have done that.” I said to myself. If only Emma had kept it a family thing and didn't have that one over, things would have been a lot easier. I intentionally left a note out of the flower delivery, but I knew she recognised the sender, irregardless. Before I knew it,my 5:30 alarm went off, and I had to throw on my tux as fast as I could. It'd be great if my dad and Linda got down to a full audience waiting for them. It was a really big deal for my dad, so big he had made arrangements for his helicopter to pick them both at ten o'clock. Linda was wearing a slick floor length satin dress in emerald green, paired
Emma's POVI decided to see my mom before the dinner. I didn't care if it was right or wrong, but I'd barely seen her all through the day and I was dying to know how she was holding up. Maybe an escape for myself was the other motive, but primarily, I wanted to know how she was doing. “Hey mom.” I said, pushing her door open. It almost felt like it was her wedding all over again. Mark was going all out. And I didn't know why it had to be that big for a guest list of just sixteen people. “This is a lot.” I smiled. “It is.” I saw the woman beneath all the makeup, hair glam, and accessories. She was still just my mom. “Can I have a moment with my daughter please?” She referred to everyone else in the room who wasn't me, and they, by my rough headcount, were about eight. “We can spare only about half an hour.” A kind lady who looked like she was in her thirties said, She had an outrageous makeup done. While it looked good, edgy, classy on her, I hope that wasn't gonna be my
Emma's POV. “You were gonna go in.” He said, looking away. “I was.” I replied, unshifting. He no longer had the courage to stare me down, and I no longer had the will to leave, “MIT looks good on you.” He said. “Thank you.” I smiled, “I could say the same for you.” “I see you've made new friends, well old ones,but you know…” He said. I chuckled within myself. Who'd have known that I could make the bad boy Chase unsure about me? “Yeah, I had no choice.” I murmured. “Uhm, how are you?” I asked, just out of courtesy, I told myself. I thought being brave and bold was gonna make me indestructible by him, but I was beginning to come off as antagonistic, and I didn't like it. Deep down, in the corners of my heart I hoped Kevin would never see, Chase occupied it. I wanted for him to close the distance between us like he'd once done. To treat me like his own. I was getting a little teary, so I dug my freshly manicured nail into my palm, I wasn't gonna cry, I could not.