chapter 1

CELLA'S POV

I didn’t know exactly what I was running from, but I knew that if I stopped, I would die.

My legs moved on their own accord, carrying me forward like I was being pulled by some invisible force.

Then I heard a howl.

I shook my head, refusing to look back. It couldn’t be real but it came again, louder this time and closer. My heart beat so violently I thought it might burst out of my chest.

A sudden rush of wind slammed into me, causing me to trip and hit the ground hard. I tried to push myself up but something heavy pressed down on me.

I tried to scream, but no sound came out. I kept trying to make a sound, still nothing as I couldn't breathe right.

Pain shot through me as something sank its teeth into my neck. I thumped to the ground, the sting unbearable.

“Cella! Cella!”

I jerked, my eyes snapping open to dim light as I sucked in air like I had forgotten how to breathe. I lay on the floor with my muscles all tensed.

It was the same nightmare I had been having for weeks now and I still couldn’t tell why or what it was.

“Cella!” the voice called again.

“I’m up,” I said, springing to my feet and brushing my hair back from my face. My voice sounded steadier than I felt, but I forced it out.

“Having nightmares again?” Sue asked, tilting her head with concern as she looked at me.

I swallowed, nodding. “Yeah… again.”

Sue stepped closer as she gently placed her hand firmly on my forehead. I could feel the scorching heat of my skin under her touch, and I knew my temperature was dangerously high.

“I’ll be fine, Sue,” I said, forcing a calmness into my voice that I didn’t feel.

Sue’s eyes narrowed slightly as she reached out again, but I stepped back before her hand could touch me. “You need to tell your papa,” she said, her voice tight with worry.

I let out a short, bitter laugh and shook my head, brushing a loose strand of hair behind my ear. “Tell him what, exactly?” My lips curved into a smirk that I didn’t feel. “This isn’t the first time, and…” I paused, glancing at her carefully, “I’m willing to bet it won’t be the last either.”

My papa wouldn't understand what was going on as he would look at me differently. He already noticed the… things that made me different. If I told him about this, it wouldn’t just be a nightmare; it would be another mark on the list. Another reminder that I didn't fit in.

“Why are you here, Sue?” I asked, my voice trembling slightly despite my attempt at calm.

Her eyes narrowed, and she stepped closer. “You can’t avoid this talk, Cella,” she said, her voice firm but soft.

I stepped back and grabbed the bars of my bed for support. “I’m not going to continue this conversation,” I said, my voice a little stronger than I felt. “Just… tell me why you’re here.” My heart pounded.

“The Luna is asking for you.”

For a moment my mind went blank. I opened my mouth to speak, but the words died before they could form.

I tightened my grip on the bars of the bed. “Why…” I swallowed, my throat suddenly dry. “Why would she want to see me?” I finally managed to ask, my voice barely holding together.

Sue shrugged and headed toward the door, but then she froze, her hand lingering on the knob. “You know it’s not good to keep her waiting,” she said.

When Sue left, I didn’t waste any time, my mind raced faster than my feet as I dashed into the dressing room. I grabbed the first dress I could find and pulled it on, tying my hair into something passable as I checked the mirror for anything out of place. Although it wasn’t perfect, it would have to do.

I couldn’t let anyone see anything less than my best.

I straightened my clothes, raised my chin then motioned for the guards to open the door.

I strolled into the hall, the luna and the alpha stood by each other talking-- no, they were barely whispering that I couldn't even pick up the faintest of sounds.

"Papa and Mother," I said as I bowed my head slightly. "Under the moon's eye."

"And guard you," my Papa responded.

I raised my head to meet my parents' sharp eyes but quickly lowered it. "You sent for me, mother."

Her eyes dragged over me, slowly and they felt cold. The look made my stomach twist. Whatever she saw clearly did not please her, but she masked it as she stepped closer, her face smoothing into something hard and unreadable.

"We have something of great importance to tell you."

Importance?

The word rang in my head, hollow and strange. Important things were never meant for me. I was never part of plans, never part of decisions. I was the shadow that stayed behind while the pack moved forward without me. So why now? Why drag me into this?

I swallowed hard as I held on to the hem of my gown. "What is it?" I finally asked.

My papa glanced at my mother, his jaw tightening, his eyes filled with something that looked close to regret. He didn’t speak nor did he try to stop her either.

My mother, with the wildest smile I had ever seen her wear, announced. "You are to get ready as you will be sent away to meet your betrothed husband today."

The words felt like a ton of bricks were thrown at me as I took a small step back.

“We are losing our resources,” my papa added before I could gather my thoughts. “We need to make a pact with one of the strongest packs.”

A rush of heat prickled at my cheeks, but a shiver ran down my spine anyway. My throat tightened, refusing to form the words my mind demanded.

“Papa—” I gasped, voice cracking.

“This is not up for discussion, Cella!” He took a measured step toward me but the gap between us remained. “It is your duty to do everything for the sake of our pack.”

I opened my mouth again, panic clawing up my throat. “But… papa—”

“You should be grateful,” my mother’s voice cut through the room. “That we have finally found a use for you, Cella.”

Use?

My breath stuttered, and I felt it stay somewhere deep in my chest. I stared at her, my fingers slowly loosening from the fabric of my gown, and a hollow laugh pressed against my throat, but I swallowed it down.

Of course, I knew this wasn’t about trust or love. I knew this was about desperation as their eyes told me everything they wouldn’t say out loud. Mother tried to hide hers just well enough but I was way too good at reading people to know how they really felt.

I had never been their first choice, hell, I had never even been their second either, and now, when the pack stood on the edge of ruin, now they were finally looking at me.

Not because I mattered, but because there was no one else left to offer.

"Why... why are you doing this?" I finally found my voice again.

My mother laughed, a sound that made something cold coil in my stomach. It was sharp and mocking like my words were nothing more than a joke. “Why?” she said again smiling. “We gave you a home. We fed you, sheltered you, and we’ve been nothing but kind. And this… this is how you say thank you.”

“Thank you?” I spat the word out before I even thought. My throat felt raw, as though the words burned as they left me. “You’ve never cared about me! Not once!” I took a deep breath. “And now… now you expect me to give my life? You expect me to do this… just like that?”

“You sound like you have a choice in this,” my papa finally said, his voice was calm but almost mocking in its own way.

I swallowed hard, my eyes darting between them, trying to find some sense in all of this. Some explanation that would make my brain stop screaming in disbelief. But nothing made sense. Nothing at all.

“Pa—” I whispered, my voice small, shaky, but desperate.

He turned slowly, folding his hands behind his back as if I wasn’t even there. My gaze snapped to my mother and her smile hadn’t wavered; like she had been waiting for this moment all along, like this was exactly what she wanted-- to be rid of me, finally.

“Pa, please,” I said again, taking a careful step closer. My legs felt like lead as they became heavy with fear and frustration. “You have to listen. I… I’m not the right person for this. You know it. I am not—”

“You are the Alpha’s daughter!” he roared, his voice booming.

“Am I?” I yelled back, my voice cracking under the weight of everything I’d ever bottled up. My chest felt like it would burst. “Am I? Because I’ve never been treated like one! Never!” I ran a hand through my hair. “All my life I had to hide, to stay invisible, because that’s what you told me to do! I’ve done everything… everything to get your attention! To make you see me!”

I took in a sniff as a tear dropped down my face. “And all I ever got was hatred and anger! So why now? Why me, Father?” I spun toward my mother, my hands shaking so violently I could barely keep them still. “Mother—”

“Oh, please. Stop this charade,” she barked, her voice sharp and cold as steel. “I have put up with you long enough. This is our decision. End of discussion.”

Before I could even breathe, the sound of heavy footsteps echoed behind me. The sound of spears clanged against the floor.

“Take her away,” my father ordered, his voice calm.

Two men stepped forward as their hands grabbed my arms firmly. I struggled, kicking and twisting as my knees hit the cold floor. “Father! Please! Don’t do this!” I cried, desperation choking my voice hoping he would look at me and see me broken. See the fear in my eyes or see that I couldn’t bear this, that I couldn’t survive it.

But the harder I fought, the tighter the guards' grip became, crushing me in their hands.

“Lock her up and stand guard. Make sure she doesn’t try anything funny,” my mother commanded, leaving no room for argument.

Any tiny hope I had, that maybe my father would stop this, that maybe he would care, vanished in an instant.

They dragged me through the long hall as I stole one last look at my father. He turned his back, climbing the steps to his throne with a cold and empty expression, leaving me behind as if I were already dead to him.

My life flashed before my eyes in painful fragments. Cella Ardentis-- my name was the only thing that mattered. That was all I was. Only a name. Never recognized and never valued. Even in my own home, even among my own pack, I had always been invisible. Locked away in this castle, my home, my prison, and now… now they expected me to step into the real world?

Live a life I had never known?

The guards threw me into my room. I hit the floor as the door slammed shut behind me, my chest heaving with panic. I pressed my back to the door, my fingers digging into the floor as I tried to catch my breath.

I dragged my hands through my hair and froze. My fingers curled tightly around the strands, pulling hard, the sharp sting grounding me in the moment. It hurt but I welcomed it as the pain was real and it was something I could feel and what I could control.

Then the pressure inside me finally broke. A scream tore out of my chest before I could stop it. I folded forward, dropping into a crouch, my head buried between my knees as the sound echoed around the room.

Slowly, the scream faded into heavy breaths. One after another as I lifted my head, my vision blurry, my chest rising and falling like I had just run for miles. I pushed my hair back with trembling hands and forced myself to stand. My legs felt weak, but they held.

I leaned my back against the cold wall, letting it support me as I closed my eyes for a moment-- breathing in, breathing out, steadying myself.

I was done.

Through being told what to do.

And being locked away as if I meant nothing.

I opened my eyes, and I didn’t hesitate as I turned, ran to the window, and climbed out.