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Chapter 18: Retail therapy
Last Updated:
2025-05-25 02:17:44
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Fuel Me, Break Me, Love Me Chapter 51 : Hate Waiting
DalonI qualified seventh yesterday. Already there are critics, trying to dissect my every movement, trying to see where I messed up, judging my every move, throwing out comments about my ability to truly become a World Champion. Some are saying I can’t handle the pressure, that I am sabotaging my own races because I have a fear of actually being successful. Others are saying it is because I am messed up with two women and if I can’t even be faithful to one woman, then how can I be faithful to the sport, or my career, my team. No matter how many times I have told them that Tiane is only a friend, the rumors still spread.I am sitting in my room, trying to get my mind focused on the race, but my mind keeps going to Rejena, wondering if she is alright, if she will ever forgive me. I have finished my side of my plan to win her back, but now I am depending on others to execute that plan. Will she understand why I am going this far to win her back, or will she hate me for it?Frustrated, I
Fuel Me, Break Me, Love Me Chapter 50: Long drive
RejenaI sit at the river, my feet in the water as I watch my dogs run through the water, chasing each other. I have been coming here every morning for the last four days, taking the same route that leads to the same place. The girls left two days ago, wanting to support their men. Tiane was willing to stay behind, but I had told her to go as she is as much a fan of the sport as the rest of us. I wanted her to have fun, not stay behind with me while I contemplated my life.At first, I had wanted to go to the race, but when Thursday came around, I grabbed the leeches instead of my bag waiting in the corner of the guest room. When the girls were calling me non-stop to find out where I was, I was at the river, telling them to go on without me. I just couldn’t make myself go, couldn’t make myself face him, not when I wasn’t truly sure where his heart was. I know what everyone is telling me, know through his action before the terrible night, that he had feelings for me, but I can’t imagine
Fuel Me, Break Me, Love Me Chapter 49: The plan
DalonCameras flash, people scream my name, asking me to look to the left, then the right, straight ahead. I smile, force myself to pretend that I am not slightly hallow inside. They want to see the leader of the championship, not the man underneath. Then again, whether I smile or don’t smile, win from pole position or fighting my way up the grid, whether I have a clean race or whether I crash, the critics are out there, trying to break down a man they don’t know. It is never just a judge of my driving, but a judge of my character.“Dalon, smile for the camera.” A reporter says, and I have to force my smile on again, not even realizing that I had stopped smiling. “Dalon, where is Rejena.” A reporter shouts, shocking me. I have no idea why I am shocked that they know her name. They have had more than enough time to find her on social media, stalk her, dissect every part of her life. They have had more than enough time to make up their own narrative about her, and the fact that she has
Fuel Me, Break Me, Love Me Chapter 48: Grief
RejenaThe moment I had seen Mila again, it felt like this strong girl act that I had been trying to hold onto, crumbled. She had seen me at my worst only a few months ago. She had seen me break the day Dalon had left and she had dried my tears. What had been a holiday to find myself had turned into a whirlwind of emotions and it changed my life in more ways than I had ever thought possible. Not only had I traveled to more places than I had started to believe I ever would, but I also got to see the one sport I was passionate about, up close. I left a job that had led to nowhere really, even though I had loved the company and people, it was not who I was, and I had to have my heart mended and broken again to finally step out of that lovely cage I had built for myself.“Are you done crying now? Are you going to go fight for that man?” Mila asks when I finally gather myself enough. She had called me into the kitchen to help her with the food, but what she actually wanted to do was to get
Fuel Me, Break Me, Love Me Chapter 47: Actions
Dalon“How is she doing?” I ask Tiane, remembering how much weight Jena had lost the last time I had been stupid and walked away from her, leaving her in tears at that airport in Italy. She had looked hollow back then and that was when she had barely known me, had barely had time to fall for me. Now that I know how she felt about me, how her feelings had grown just as mine had, I am worried that she might be a broken shell of herself, and it would all be my fault.“She looks happy. Free even, if that makes any sense. She is here, you know.” She says, and I stop breathing. Here? In Italy? I didn’t even know Tiane was here. We had agreed to keep a distance until the media had died down, but she is here, and so is Jena.“The two of you are together?” I ask, confused. I knew that they were talking, that Tiane had reached out to apologize to Jena, even thought she had nothing to apologize for as this was all on me. According to her, Jena forgive her without much fight and she even talks to
Fuel Me, Break Me, Love Me Chapter 46: Group chat
Rejena“Are you sure you still want to do this?” Dan asks, sitting in front of me, looking like his same old self, but there is an exciting buzz around him, mixed with sadness. “He is with someone else, Jena. You don’t have to leave here.” He says and I know he isn’t trying to hurt me, but his words cut deeper than a knife.“It has nothing to do with Dalon, Dan. I am doing this for me. You know I enjoyed working on the social committee more than I ever loved the numbers. I am a creative person that had to become someone willing to settle in order to survive. I am done just living for a salary and going home only to do it all over again every single day. I found myself, regardless of what happened between Dalon and I, and I am not going back to what I was doing. That isn’t living. You have your beautiful wife and daughter to go back to every night. I have my dogs, yes, but that is it. I want to see what life has to offer and I am sorry to say this, but I am not going to find what you h
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