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CHAPTER 50: LUNCH
公開日:
2026-06-17 05:07:44
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HER MOTHER’S HUSBAND CHAPTER 64: JENNIFER CONT’D
I gave her the tour.The house received Jennifer the way it received everything, with its particular quality of established permanence, the rooms doing what they always did regardless of who was moving through them. Jennifer moved through them with the specific Jennifer quality, the noticing, the commentary, the way she had always been in spaces — fully present in them, reading them with the attention of someone who believed houses told you things.The library.The sitting room.The formal dining room, which she looked at for a long time.“You eat here every night?” she said.“Yes,” I said.She looked at the table. The length of it. The three places that would be set at seven.“With your mum,” she said.“Yes,” I said.“And her husband,” she said.“Yes,” I said.She looked at the table.She looked at me.I kept my face doing the normal face.She said nothing yet. This was the Jennifer method — the looking, the filing, the saying nothing until she had enough to say something worth sayin
HER MOTHER’S HUSBAND CHAPTER 63: JENNIFER
BELLA’S POVI heard him leave for the run at six-forty.I had been awake since five. Not the ceiling wakefulness, not the thinking kind — the other kind, the kind that lived in the body rather than the mind, the specific physical alertness of someone whose nervous system had not fully stood down from the night before. I lay in the dark and I listened to the house and at six-forty his door opened and his steps went down the corridor and the rear door closed behind him and I exhaled for what felt like the first time since the kitchen.One step.I had been trying, since I’d gotten back into bed at midnight, to think about it with the analytical distance of someone assessing a situation rather than the body-knowledge of someone who had been standing three feet away from it. The analysis kept failing. Every time I assembled the distance the kitchen came back — the dark, the fountain sound, the undone shirt, the night version of him, the one step and the stop, and the way passing him in the
HER MOTHER’S HUSBAND CHAPTER 62: THE PULL CONT’D
I couldn’t sleep.This was not the five-thirty calibrated wakefulness of a person whose body had decided the night was over. This was the other kind, the specific wakefulness of someone whose mind had not agreed to stop yet, the ceiling getting the full inventory of the day on repeat. The window seat. The said thing. His face. The phone. Marcus. The library door. Dinner. The refilled wine. My mother looking at her glass.I turned over.I turned back.I looked at the ceiling.At eleven forty-five I got up.Not for a reason. The getting up of a person who has been lying in the dark long enough that lying in the dark is no longer preferable to anything else. I pulled on the oversized shirt I slept in, the old one, soft from washing, the one from before this house. I went to the window.The garden at night.Different from the day, the specific quality of the estate after dark, the grounds going quiet in a way they didn’t during the day. The fountain was still running — it ran through the
HER MOTHER’S HUSBAND CHAPTER 61: THE PULL
BELLA’S POVHe didn’t come back to the library.I sat on the window seat for ten minutes after he walked out, which was approximately nine minutes and fifty seconds longer than my dignity should have allowed, and I knew this and I sat there anyway. The cushion was warm where he’d been. I was aware of this with the specific awareness of a nineteen year old who had been sitting close to someone she wanted and was now sitting in the warm space they’d left behind, which was pathetic, which I acknowledged, which did not make me move.The garden outside was doing its late afternoon thing.I was not looking at the garden.I was looking at the door he had walked through and I was replaying the phone ringing with the specific resentment of someone who had been interrupted at the worst possible moment and was not mature enough yet to be philosophical about it. The worst possible moment. His face doing the thing, the unmanaged thing, and the distance between us on the window seat being the dista
HER MOTHER’S HUSBAND CHAPTER 60: THE RIGHT WORD CONT’D
The library.The Wednesday morning. The clock. The books.“All right,” I said.She kept her eyes on the window.“Is there anything you want to tell me?” she said. “About being here. About. How you are finding it.”The question wrapped around its real question. I could feel the shape of the real question inside the asked one, the outline of it, my mother circling the thing she had half-understood in the kitchen on Monday and had been carrying since.I thought about honesty.Not the full honesty, not the library chairs and the bench and the adjacent chair and the I know exchanged over the breakfast table. Not that. But the honest thing that was available to me in this Wednesday library with my mother in the chair across from me and her question sitting in the air between us with its second question inside it.“I love it here,” I said. “More than I expected to. The house suits me. The garden.” I paused. “I feel like I can breathe here in a way I haven’t in a long time.”My mother absorbe
HER MOTHER’S HUSBAND CHAPTER 59: THE RIGHT WORD
BELLA’S POVMy mother did not bring it up at dinner.This was almost worse than if she had.I had been prepared for the dinner table version of it — the oblique question, the mild look with the second question inside it, the specific maternal method of arriving at a thing from the side rather than head-on. I had sat down at my place with the managed composure of someone who had spent the afternoon in the library reading the same page eleven times and had arrived at dinner ready for the conversation that was coming.It didn’t come.My mother talked about her week. The calls she had scheduled, the friend in the city she was meeting Thursday, the coat she had seen online that she couldn’t decide about. She talked about the garden, the east beds, whether the gardener had been informed about the colchicum. She talked about Marcus, the incoming weekend visit, the room that would need to be prepared.She talked about everything except the Monday kitchen and the one second too long and the ri
HER MOTHER’S HUSBAND CHAPTER 7
BELLA'S POVHe was already at the table.Of course he was.Suit on, perfectly pressed, coffee in hand, a set of documents spread in front of him that he was reading with the calm focused attention of a man for whom the contents of his own mind had apparently raised no difficulties at all during the
HER MOTHER’S HUSBAND CHAPTER 6: CHECKING WHAT'S HIS PLANS
BELLA'S POVDo not think about why he said nothing.The ceiling offered no guidance on these matters.I pressed the heels of my hands to my eyes until I saw colors. This was something I used to do as a child when I couldn't sleep, press my eyes and watch the shapes the pressure made, purple-green
HER MOTHER’S HUSBAND CHAPTER 5: THE MOVIE
BELLA'S POVI should have walked away the moment I heard the sound.That was the smart thing to do. The right thing. The thing any normal person would have done, turned around, gone back to their room, closed the door, pretended they'd heard nothing.But I have never, apparently, been particularly
HER MOTHER’S HUSBAND CHAPTER 4 : MY MUM HUSBAND IS DRIVING ME CRAZY
I looked at my phone. It was Jennifer, my friend. But Jennifer wasn't hearing me, in fact, the call kept cutting out. Neither of us could hear each other properly.The call ended.I dropped the phone in frustration and headed to the bathroom to take a bath.The bathroom was absolutely gorgeous. Mar
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