Chapter 37

AMARA’S POV***

I didn’t know how I got out of that office.

One minute I was standing there, holding a file like it suddenly weighed a hundred pounds… and the next, I was walking down the hallway like my legs weren’t mine.

I shouldn't have forgotten the file at the office. I shouldn't have come back to collect it. Hell, I shouldn't have gone into his office to make clarifications about his schedule and meetings tomorrow. But I guess it was all for the best.

I kept my face calm. I kept my posture straight. Because that’s what you do when you’re humiliated. You don’t give anyone the satisfaction of seeing it.

But the moment the elevator doors closed, my breath left my chest in one shaky exhale.

My throat burned.

Not because I wanted to cry—no. I refused to cry.

But because my pride had been hit so hard it felt like my body didn’t know where to put the pain.

I stared at my reflection in the elevator mirror. My eyes were glossy, not enough for tears to fall. Just enough to betray me.

I blinked hard, swallowing it down.

Stupid girl.

I should have known better than to let my heart wander in places it wasn’t invited. I should have known better than to let a man like Dorian Wellington make me feel like I mattered.

The elevator opened.

I got into a cab and gave the driver my address. My voice didn’t shake.

But the moment the car started moving, my mind replayed everything in slow motion.

The way she sat there, the way she said it so confidently—

Dorian’s fiancée.

And Dorian…Dorian didn’t deny it.

I pressed my forehead against the window and watched the city blur past. I felt embarrassment.

Because suddenly, everything made sense.

His hesitation. His restraint. His constant pulling away.

The way he looked at me like he wanted me, then acted like I disgusted him.

It wasn’t confusion. It was control.

He had someone else and I was just… entertainment. A phase.

I laughed quietly, but it didn’t sound like laughter. It sounded broken.

I finally arrived home, even though I didn't want to come back. I just needed a drive all night.

I dropped my bag on the couch and walked into my bedroom like a ghost. I didn’t even take off my shoes. I sat on the edge of my bed, staring at nothing.

My mind drifted again.

Back to that office, to Sofia’s smile. To the way she looked at me like I was the help.

And the worst part… The worst part wasn’t even her.

It was Dorian because when I looked into his eyes, I saw something.

Something that looked like regret. Something that looked like he wanted to speak but he didn’t. And that silence had said everything.

I stood up abruptly and went into the bathroom, turning on the sink.

I splashed my face with the cold water.

Twice.

Then I stared at myself in the mirror. I looked fine but my eyes were different. I leaned closer to the mirror.

“Get a grip,” I whispered to myself.

My voice cracked. I clenched my jaw.

“No,” I corrected, firmer. “Get a grip, Amara.”

Because I couldn’t afford this. Not with Mum in the hospital. Not with bills waiting. Not with life being so unforgiving.

I wasn’t about to fall apart over a man who couldn’t even choose me.

I took off my clothes, changed into a plain oversized shirt, and lay down on the bed. 

Sleep didn’t come. My thoughts were too loud.

His hands on my body, his voice in my ear. His jealousy. His eyes when he asked—

I squeezed my eyes shut.

Liar.

He had been asking that while his fiancée sat on his desk. My chest tightened so badly I thought I might throw up. I turned to the other side, pressing my face into the pillow.

Still no sleep.

After hours of tossing, I finally drifted off into a restless, shallow sleep. When morning came, I woke up with a heavy head and a heavier heart.

I got dressed in silence, tied my hair back neatly, and applied light makeup– Not to look pretty but to look composed.

When I arrived at the office building, I didn’t hesitate. I walked into my office, dropped my bag, and immediately picked up the schedule and files for the day.

I stepped out of my office and walked straight to Dorian’s. When I entered, he looked up immediately.

His eyes locked on mine and for a split second… I saw guilt. The tension. He opened his mouth to speak but I didn’t give him the chance.

“Good morning, Mr Wellington,” I said smoothly, like last night had never happened. “Your nine a.m. is waiting. The audit team arrives at noon, and your call with Zurich has been moved to three.”

His jaw tightened.

He stood up slowly, like he didn’t trust himself to sit.

“Amara,” he said, voice low.

I didn’t blink. “Yes, sir?”

His eyes searched my face like he was looking for something.

Some crack. Some weakness, a sign that I was hurt.

I didn’t give him one.

“I need to talk to you,” he said.

I tilted my head slightly. “About work?”

His lips parted. Closed again.

“No.”

I nodded as if I understood then I smiled. Not sweetly but professionally.

“Then I’m afraid I don’t have time,” I said. “Your schedule is full today.”

His eyes darkened.

“Amara—”

“I’ll have the contracts on your desk in an hour,” I added calmly.

Then, before he could say another word, I turned to leave.

But his voice stopped me. Low. Rough.

“Are you angry?”

I paused.

I didn’t turn around immediately.

I let the silence stretch.

Then I faced him again.

My expression was calm.

“No, sir,” I said. “Why would I be?”

He stared at me like he didn’t believe me.

And maybe he shouldn’t have.

Because the truth was—

I wasn’t angry.

Anger would mean I still cared enough to fight.

I was something worse.

I was done.

I met his eyes, steady and unshaking.

“If there’s nothing else, Mr Wellington,” I said softly, “I’d like to take my leave.”

He didn’t answer.

He just watched me like he was watching something slip out of his hands.

I walked out of his office and closed the door behind me.

And for the first time since I met him… I felt like I could breathe.

But the air still hurts because even as I walked away, one thought kept repeating in my mind—

So this is what I was.

The almost.

The maybe. The thing he wanted but never intended to keep.