Going back home

CAMILLA

~•~

They say you do not know the value of what you have until you lose it. I do not think I understood that statement until I had the barrel of a gun pressed to the right side of my stomach.

As he spun me around, growling behind me to follow him, my mind wandered back to many things.

I thought about my fight with Tehilah, how Freddie was still mad at me, and all the times I could have decided to forgive that I held grudges.

I thought about mister Ivan's lips against mine, our bodies tangled in a pleasurable mix of sweat and reproductive juices. I wondered, just for a brief moment, if I regretted any of it.

And the answer was no.

I wished that I had seen my mother on the day she died, I wished that I had said goodbye, held her hand, and kissed her hair. I wished that I had told her there was more to life than stupid men and Tehilah and I was never going to leave her as my father had left her.

I wished I had seen the signs earlier and was able to stop her.

I wished I ha