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Healing with the Monster The music at the campus party was too loud to hear my own fear. I trusted the drink my friend gave me. It was the last thing I remembered before my world went dark. That night cost me everything—my reputation, my family, and the life I once knew. Five years later, I’ve finally found a fragile peace… until tragedy strikes again, leaving me desperate to save my son. Then he appears. Julian. A man with a dark past. A man tied to my child in ways I don’t understand. A man I should fear… But can’t stop falling for. Because the deeper I fall, the more I realize the horrifying truth— He isn’t just connected to my past. He is the monster who destroyed it. Can love survive something this unforgivable… or will the truth destroy us both?
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Chapter 1: The glass of Judas
The bass was a physical weight. It throbbed in the floorboards of the off-campus apartment, vibrating through the soles of my sneakers and settling in my ribs. I hated it.
"Elara, stop looking at your phone! Your parents aren't going to call fire and brimstone down on you before midnight," Emma shouted over the music, her laughter bright and infectious. She looked beautiful—full of life, her braids swinging as she danced.
I tried to smile, but my hand instinctively went to my phone in my pocket. "You know how my father is, Emma. If I’m not back by eleven, the 'Godly' lectures start at five a.m."
"Relax, babe," a new voice joined us. Dyna stepped out of the shadows of the hallway. She wasn't dancing. She was holding two plastic cups, the red liquid inside sloshing against the rim. "It’s the end of the semester. Even a minister’s daughter deserves one night of freedom."
Dyna handed me one of the cups. Her eyes were fixed on mine, steady and unblinking.
"I don't know, Dyna..." I hesitated.
"It's just punch, Elara. Non-alcoholic, just for you," Dyna insisted, her voice smooth. "Mark is already at the VIP section. He’s waiting for you to 'loosen up' so he can introduce you to the senior department heads. You want to be a good girlfriend, don't you?"
I looked across the room. Mark, my "perfect" boyfriend, was surrounded by people, laughing and looking every bit the golden boy. He didn't look my way.
"Fine," I sighed, taking the cup. "One drink."
"That's my girl," Dyna whispered.
As I raised the cup to my lips, I felt a strange prickle on the back of my neck. It was that feeling of being watched. I looked toward the darkened kitchen archway.
A man stood there. He was tall, his frame nearly filling the doorway, shrouded in a dark hoodie. I couldn't see his face, but the light from the disco ball caught a heavy, silver watch on his wrist. Even from five feet away, a scent cut through the smell of sweat and cheap cologne in the room: expensive cedarwood and something sharp, like hospital-grade antiseptic.
It was a cold scent. A clean scent.
I took a sip of the drink. It tasted sweet—too sweet, with a bitter metallic aftertaste that clung to the back of my throat.
"Go on, finish it," Dyna encouraged, her hand resting on my shoulder.
I drained the cup. Within minutes, the music changed. The thumping bass didn't feel like a heartbeat anymore; it felt like a hammer. The lights began to bleed into one another, turning the room into a kaleidoscope of terrifying colors.
"Emma?" I reached out, but my arm felt like it was made of lead.
Emma was spinning, her face blurring into a smear of brown and white. I looked for Dyna, but she was gone. I looked for Mark, and for a split second, I saw him. He was standing with Dyna, his back turned to me, his head leaning in close to hers.
"Mark..." I tried to scream, but my voice was a whisper.
The floor tilted. The world rushed up to meet me. As I began to fall, the scent of cedarwood grew stronger, wrapping around me like a shroud. A pair of strong, gloved hands caught me before I hit the ground, and the last thing I felt was the cold wind as I was carried out of the noise and into the silent, predatory night.
Latest chapter
Healing with the monster Chapter 186: The weight of the ledger
The pale violet haze of dawn didn't warm the cellar; it only made the ice on the high grate look sharper, like jagged glass set into the foundation stone. The air smelled of dead ash, damp lime, and the flat, greasy tang of cold river water that had pooled in the lowest drain channel.Julian sat on the bottom step, his elbows resting on his knees and his forehead pressed into his palms. His coat was pulled tight around his neck, the wool worn thin at the collar where the draft hit him directly. The broken press sat behind him, a dark, motionless mass of iron and split oak, completely swallowed by the shadows."The registry board published the revised civic rosters at mid-day, Amaka," Julian said, his voice flat and thin, devoid of any resonance. He didn't lift his head. "They aren't calling us dissidents or rebels anymore. On the official census sheets posted outside the quadrangle, our names are listed under 'unassigned labor—pending administrative reallocation.' They didn't banish u
Last Updated : 2026-09-18Healing with the monster Chapter 185: The Long Ground
The absolute dark of the basement didn't break with the dawn. It simply dissolved into a thin, violet haze that made the ice on the high iron grate look like bruised skin. The freezing air had settled permanently into the flagstones, cold enough to turn every breath into a pale, fleeting ghost.Julian remained by the hearth, motionless, his chin rested against his collarbone. He was no longer looking for tools or checking the broken frame of the press. His hands, raw and stained with ingrained soot, were tucked deep into his sleeves."The registry board didn't issue a bulletin this morning, Amaka," Julian said, his voice flat and quiet, carrying no heat, no anger, and no surprise. "They didn't need to. The queue at the central administrative hall wasn't for surrender stipends today. It was just the line for the winter coal vouchers. People stood three abreast in the frost, hands in their pockets, waiting for their names to be called by a junior clerk who didn't even look up from hi
Last Updated : 2026-09-17Healing with the monster Chapter 184 : The last Clean Margin
The frost sealed the high iron grate by midnight, locking a thick, jagged ring of white ice across the bars and cutting off even the sound of the guards' boots on the street above. Inside the basement, the air grew thick, still, and dead—insulated by its own cold, holding no sound save the slow, shallow rhythm of four people breathing in the dark.Julian sat cross-legged by the cold hearth, his hands shoved deep into his armpits to keep the last trace of warmth in his fingers. He wasn't filing iron or cutting canvas anymore. He was staring down at a small, empty tin cup that had once held lamp oil, watching the pale film of ice form across the bottom in delicate, star-like crystals."There isn't any paper left, Amaka," Julian said, his voice barely rising above the whistle of the draft. It wasn't a complaint; it was just a coordinate on a map we had finished drawing. "The last ream of pulp we hid behind the coal bin is soaked through with sump water. It turned into gray mush by mornin
Last Updated : 2026-09-15Healing with the monster Chapter 183: The Ledger of Small loses
The frost returned before dawn, pinning the soot and gray silt to the stone floor in a brittle, crunching crust. Down in the Humanities basement, the silence was total—not the expectant hush before a move, but the heavy, stagnant stillness of a place forgotten by the world above.Julian sat on the pine table, his feet resting on a stack of damp, warping pulp paper that had never seen ink. He was holding an old pair of iron scissors, cutting tiny, precise squares out of an empty flour sack. His fingers were swollen and purple from the damp chill, moving with a numb, mechanical rhythm."The registry board opened the second phase of the administrative integration today, Amaka," Julian said, his voice dropping into a dry, hollow rattle. He didn't look up from the cutting. "They're auditing the personal belongings of everyone staying in the lower dormitories. Not looking for presses or broadsheets anymore—just excess. If you have two coats, they take one for the 'district distribution pool
Last Updated : 2026-09-14Healing with the monster Chapter 3: The ghost of five years
Five Years Later...The scent of antiseptic usually made my stomach turn, a haunting reminder of the night I lost everything. But today, the sterile smell of the hospital was the only thing keeping me grounded."Mommy, can we go home now?"I looked down at Leo. At four years old, he was the only be
Healing with the monster Chapter 2: The morning of ashes
The first thing I felt was the cold. It wasn't the fresh, morning chill of an open window, but a sterile, biting cold that smelled of iron and old shadows.My eyelids felt like they had been glued shut. When I finally forced them open, the world tilted and spun. I wasn't in my dorm room. I wasn't i
Healing with the monster Chapter 5: The saint and the Sinner
The silence in Josh De Luca’s office was heavy, smelling of old leather, expensive scotch, and the faint, haunting scent of cedarwood that had lived in my nightmares for five years.Standing face-to-face with Josh was like staring into a mirror of my own ruin. While Julian was all soft edges and he
Healing with the monster Chapter 4 : The price of a heartbeat
The hospital cafeteria smelled of burnt coffee and despair. I sat tucked in a corner booth, staring at the photo Julian had given me. Two brothers. One a saint, one a shadow.Josh De Luca.The name felt like shards of glass in my mouth. For five years, I had built a wall around that night, brick by
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