Chapter 1

On her eighteenth birthday, her twin sister was rejoicing the joy of discovering her own mate while Raina Winters felt the crushing pain of discovering hers. It wasn’t every day that someone found out that their mate was the Alpha heir to their pack. Most female wolves would be howling in excitement over the prospect of landing a powerful Alpha , but she watched as her fated mate was kissed his longtime sweetheart, Mia Amato, and gazing at her with so much love that her heart shattered into pieces.

She couldn’t even be angry at Mia. Mia was beautiful inside and out. She was kind, compassionate, fair, and strong. She was everything a Luna ought to be in Raina’s eyes and she wouldn’t dare come between such a match.

She promised she wouldn’t be like the others.

She wouldn’t selfishly reveal herself, not when she had seen how much he loved her. She couldn’t deny how in love Kian Tara was with Mia and she knew that he would never love her like he loved her. She didn’t want to force him to be with her and that was the first painful lesson of fated mates.

As tears fell down her cheeks, she brushed away her tears from her skin. This would be the only time she’d allow her tears to fall. Mia was the perfect Luna-to-be and the perfect mate for him.

She was still desperate for Kian’s attention, admiration, and respect. She would find way to cement at least that if she couldn’t have his heart. She would make him proud. She could still help her mate secure his birthright by becoming a strong warrior so nobody could hurt him and his chosen Luna.

“Are you sure you don’t want him to know?” her best friend, Poppy, whispered. She knew Poppy had never seen her cry. She shook her head at that. “But you’re going to feel it, every single time he…”

Poppy trailed off, but Raina didn’t need her to finish to understand what she was alluding to. She would know every single time he made love to Mia. She would know every time her fated mate would give his body to someone else.

She nodded her. “I know. I know I will.”

“Aren’t you afraid?” Poppy asked her. “You could die from heartbreak if you two don’t reject each other.”

“He would know it’s me,” Raina told her best friend. “And-And he can never know it’s me.”

Humiliation and shame burned through her. How could she even compare herself to Mia? She didn’t want to witness his outright rejection and acceptance of hers. It would hurt her more. She was certain of it.

“I might not ever have his heart,” she whispered. “But I-I can earn his respect. That’s enough for me.”

“What’s enough for you?” Her twin sister’s voice scared her for a moment. She looked over at Sterling quickly observing if she was alone. Gratefully, Sterling’s mate was not by her side.

“N-Nothing.”

Sterling scowled as she looked back and forth between Raina and Poppy. “Don’t lie to me to me, Raina. I’m your twin for goodness sake.”

Raina sighed as she looked down at her feet. “I found out my mate too.”

“Really?” Sterling gasped. Excitement seeped into her voice. “This is so great! We can both--”

“He can never know.” She shook her head. Her eyes wide with a fear that she never felt she’d ever feel before. Her heart raced and her desperation flared. “Please, he can never know.”

Sterling frowned. Raina let her twin search her eyes and she saw her swallow thickly.

“I don’t understand--”

Raina finally cut in: “It’s Kian.”

Sterling’s eyes widened in shock at the confession. Raina knew the moment she understood. Raina hated the pity that filled Sterling’s eyes. She couldn’t stand it, because it was confirmation of everything she knew deep in her soul. She glanced over at Poppy, who couldn’t meet her eyes, because she knew the truth too. The seeds of her self-loathing were burying deep within her, but she refused to take it out on the two people that could save her from herself.

“Oh,” Sterling breathed out. “And why can’t you tell him?”

“Don’t do that,” she gasped, shaking her head. She squeezed her eyes shut. “We all know the truth. We all know he’d chose her in a heartbeat—”

“But you don’t know that,” she protested.

Raina chuckled bitterly. “I’m not stupid, Sterling. An Alpha needs to secure his bloodline by fucking his Luna and we all know he wouldn’t touch me with a ten foot pole not when he has a she-wolf like Mia at his side.” She shook her head as she allowed stupid tears to once again escape down her cheeks. This was the only time she’d cry over childish dreams. “It’s best that I don’t give into illusions.”

“Okay,” Sterling gasped. “So you’re not even going to let him know to at least reject each--”

“I’d rather die if he ever found out it was me,” she finally confessed. Sterling looked about ready to argue with her, but she put her hand up. “But I can still be of something of value to him. I’ll show him that I can be something important to him and-and that has to count for something, right?”

Poppy and Sterling exchanged concerned looks before Poppy looked at her in concern. “Is it really going to be enough for you?”

“It’s going to have to be enough,” she murmured. Her soft unsure words didn’t even believe her, but it didn’t matter.

Kian Tara would never know the truth. He would never know that her heart would break whenever he slept with his chosen mate. He would never know the kind of pain she’d endure for him so he could live peacefully with his true love. She had to believe this was what true love was too… that she would do everything to make certain he’d be a strong and powerful Alpha.

She wouldn’t let him down. She couldn’t.

Even if it shattered her soul, she would do what was necessary for him and for their pack.