Chapter 13- Secrets

Allison was more alert today as Susan took over her care. Her color seemed better and she no longer felt febrile. What a relief the strep had improved, the medicine must be working.

Since Allie was alert, Susan started her personal cares and readied her for her bath. Allison was lucky she had a beautiful reclining bath chair that allowed her the option to safely take a bath and still be partially submerged in the water to soak. Not only did Allison enjoy splashing and playing in the water, but it was very good for her skin. Before acquiring her position with Allison and her family, Susan had worked with an elderly gentleman in a private position, but he had passed away, leaving her without a job. Susan was lucky that Allison’s father took an over-the-road driving position and Tracy was able to get funding from the county for PCA services shortly after George, the elderly gentleman, had passed on. She had been with Allison ever since, and the idea of moving on once she finished college, honestly made her a little sad. Susan tried not to think about the future, but enjoyed the present. She gave Allison as many happy, fun, love filled moments as she could. It was soon 5PM, so Susan assisted Allison out of the tub and into her pajamas before heading into the kitchen to make a simple supper for herself, Allison, Alistar, Addison, and Tracy (when she got up before Susan left). Allison was actually smiling intermittently tonight and appeared interested in what Susan was cooking. Susan hoped that meant her appetite was returning and her intake of food and fluids would return again. The G-tube was for back up, but it was certainly preferable when Alison could consume her nutrition orally. 

The boys could be heard rough housing upstairs as Susan cooked supper, and she couldn’t help but smile anytime they acted like normal children and not boys with a sister with a disease and disabilities that would seriously shorten her life. Children should be allowed to play, tease, and rough house, as long as their play didn’t get out of hand. Susan pushed the intercom to notify the boys that supper was ready, as she began to grab plates and flatware for the meal. Susan begins to prepare Allison’s food, using the blender, and doesn’t hear the boys come downstairs. Addison laughed as Susan jumped because he was right next to her when she shut off the blender. “What is with guys, scaring girls half to death? That’s the second time someone snuck up on me today.”

Susan ruffles the hair on his head as he smiles brightly that he could sneak up on her. Allison also laughs because her brother is. Alistar is standing next to the high chair, talking to his sister as she starts to become impatient waiting for supper. Once everyone is dished up and sitting at the table, they all hold hands and say a quick prayer of thanks before enjoying the California style hamburgers on a bun, fresh watermelon, and fried zucchini from the garden. The boys were lucky their mom either grew her own vegetables or utilized the local Farmer’s market as much as possible to provide them with healthy food alternatives. Alistar had taken to helping his mother with weeding and picking in the garden at least weekly. Now that school was back in full swing, that was usually on the weekend. 

Addison was too young to completely understand the issues and how close they came to losing Allison when she was born. Because he remembers the struggles, Alistar has never taken Allie for granted like Addison does. Addison mostly remembers Allison being in the hospital and his parents being gone a lot because they were with her. Anger and jealousy are not always rational, and especially when it comes to children;  Addison had them in spades when Allie came home from the hospital. To this day, Addison tolerated her, but he doesn’t acknowledge her often and certainly shows no love toward her like Alistar does. Knowing how much time and care Allison needs to meet her needs, it was obvious that Addison’s life would have changed drastically when his little sister came home. Addison went from the spoiled youngest child to the middle child, but also to the sibling of a child with special needs. Addison hated it when his father began to drive trucks over-the-road, but the money and the benefits were better, allowing Tracy to stay at home with Allie. 

One afternoon, shortly after Susan had taken the position. She was awaiting Allison to return from school, while Tracy began to bend Susan’s ear about how hard life had been after Allie was born, all the medical care and expenses, and having to deal with her plethora of medical issues poor Allie was born with. Tracy had a couple drinks in her system, and  it had been eye opening for Susan because Tracy rarely discussed her struggles. Tracy was more of a ‘get ‘er done’ type person than a talker or complainer. That day it seemed she had had just enough alcohol to relax her lips and remove her inhibitions. Since it had been a school day and Susan was covering the evening hours, it was a rare opportunity for Tracy to relax and have some wine, and she had done just that. Yes, Tracy’s life was difficult, but Susan had the utmost respect for her. No matter how tough life became, Tracy and her family always found a way to make it work.

Allison ate most of her meal, a huge improvement over the last 36 hours. Susan and then the boys, diligently rinsed their plates in the sink and placed them in the dishwasher. After a brief discussion about whose turn it was to do the dishes, Alistar began to run a sink full of water and load the remaining dishes in the dishwasher. Anytime Susan witnessed Alistar completing tasks like this, Susan was always impressed by what a mature, responsible young man he was becoming. Alistar has discussed getting a job, but Tracy was afraid it may affect the amount of assistance they receive from the county, so a regular job was not an option as long as he lived at home. Luckily for Alistar, he was able to pick up some lawn mowing jobs in the summer and snow clearing jobs in the winter. Spring and fall were quieter, but that allowed him time to do things like go to homecoming, prom, sporting events, and ultimately try to be a teenager while it lasted. Alistar rarely acted his age, but Tracy tried to encourage it when the opportunity presented itself. 

After washing Allison’s face and hands and removing her clothing protector from her shirt, Susan washed the high chair tray and then the dining table. Alistar smiled when she rinsed the rag. “Thanks Susan, I appreciate the help.”

Susan smiled in return, nodded, then replied, “I appreciate how much you help your mom and sister out around here.” 

“Everytime Dad leaves, he asks me to be the man of the house and to help out wherever I can, so I try to.” Alistar says as he finishes washing up the dishes that didn’t fit in the dishwasher, and takes the rag Susan brought back to wipe the counter. Alistar sighs as he pulls the drain from the sink.

Picking up Allison, Susan puts her on her hip and turns to head for the living room, but upon hearing the sigh, turns toward the young man. “Hey, what’s the sigh for Alistar? You do a great job helping out.”

“Thanks,” he says as he leans his hip back against the sink and crosses his arms over his chest. “It’s not that. I have a dilemma and I’m not sure what to do…”

“Do you want to talk about it?” Susan asks as she raises one eyebrow in question. It’s so unlike Alistar to be this bothered by something.

“No, yes… I don’t know.” Alistar sighs again before continuing. “Hypothetically, if someone you knew and cared about was doing something that wasn’t exactly a lie, but wasn’t exactly the truth either, would you tell someone?”

Susan raises the other eyebrow before taking a deep breath and repositioning Allie on her other hip. “Could someone get hurt because of the ½ truth?” 

Alistar holds his hand up and makes a waffling motioning before he speaks, “maybe? If I tell you, can you keep it to yourself?” Susan nods in return. “I think Dad had another job last weekend and his truck wasn’t broken down..or..if it was, that was not the cause of him being gone. I think he was doing a job that Mom wouldn’t approve of to earn extra money and didn’t tell us.”

Susan looked at Alistar seriously. “You're sure, or you think?”

“Well, I’m pretty sure. I saw a couple of chats between Dad and his part-time boss. He left the chat window open on the laptop and I borrowed it for homework. Anyway, the chat said that he was helping with a job last weekend and that he would be paid well as long as they reached their goal. I have no idea what that means, but that sure isn’t him sitting because his truck was broken down, and Mom hasn’t said anything. She usually tells me, not Addi (what Alistar calls his baby brother), but me. She trusts me and knows I can and do understand how tough things are sometimes with extra medical expenses and such.” Alistar smiles and takes Allie’s little hand in his. Allie giggles in response. This is why she loves her big brother so much.

“Do you think your dad is doing it for the good of the family?’ Susan asked seriously.

“Yeah. I have no doubt what he is doing is what he thinks is best. Dad would never do anything illegal. You know him.. He’s a God fearing man. He loves his family, which is exactly why I think he figured whatever it was is best not to share.”

“Your parents don’t have an anniversary or birthday or something coming up do they? Something he might need extra money for and want it to be a surprise?”  Susan asked.

Alistar thought  for a minute, “Mom’s birthday is coming up in November and then Christmas in December. Their anniversary is in... I think... July? Considering it's only September, I suppose it's possible, but seems unlikely. You’re probably right though, it's probably something like that. See, that's why I asked you. You speak to me like a person and not a kid like most adults do.”

Susan smiled back at Alistar before saying, “I’m only 5 years older than you are Alistar. I better not be that way, yet. Try not to stress. I’m sure everything will work out. I gotta get Allie’s meds and start her bedtime routine.”

“Okay. Thanks for listening and thanks for cooking supper so I didn’t have to. You are definitely a better cook. Like I told you before… if you aren’t taken when I turn eighteen, I’ll be putting a ring on your finger.” Alistar smiled at Susan before walking out of the room and jogging up the steps. Being the serious student that he was, he likely had homework to do.

Susan smiled and shook her head at Alistar’s comment. He had said that very thing to her about eighteen months ago. Susan just laughed at him, but now she was starting to wonder if he did indeed have a little crush on her. Oh well, she would be leaving before he would have a chance to propose, if all went as planned. Susan finished her shift, gave cares over to Mom, and went home to bed for the night.