I Finally Chose Myself

Mom cleared her throat pointedly.

Celia Kessler looked up. When she saw me there, she quickly changed the subject.

"Mom, Dad, I got you both presents!"

She pulled out several custom-made dolls. "Look! Don't they look like you? I got ones of Bryan and me too. Now the whole family's here!"

The snide look Mom had been giving me vanished instantly, and her face lit up.

"Celia, you've got plenty of expenses of your own, and you still bought us gifts. You're nothing like some people who only ever think about themselves."

I couldn't help asking, "Mom, doesn't Celia only make 2,000 dollars a month?"

Before Mom could answer, Celia waved me off dramatically.

"Naomi, I only made 2,000 dollars a month for two months. Stop teasing me. That barely covered anything, so I begged Dad to pay to get me into Briarwood Group!"

I was stunned. I knew that company. It took at least 100,000 dollars to get your foot in the door, and even then, you needed connections.

But when I graduated and started looking for work, Dad told me I had to find a job on my own. He said there wasn't much he could do to help.

He said he'd always done things by the book and couldn't stand people who pulled strings to get ahead. To him, it was unfair to everyone else.

So it wasn't that pulling strings was wrong. It just depended on who he was pulling them for.

Dad was still admiring the doll, turning it over and over in his hands.

"Celia's such a good daughter," he said.

I slowly set down my fork.

A few months earlier, I'd given Dad the neck massager. He'd barely glanced at it before muttering, "I heard this brand doesn't work that well. But you already bought it, so just leave it there."

The massager had cost me more than half a month's salary, and he hadn't even bothered to pick it up. But Celia gave him a doll, and that was enough for him to call her a good daughter.

I watched Dad smile at her, his eyes crinkling with delight. Suddenly, I felt like a complete idiot for being the one everyone in this family depended on.

Celia acted as if she'd only just noticed me. "Oh, Naomi! I completely forgot to have one made for you. Bryan, this is all your fault. Why didn't you remind me?"

Bryan Alston ruffled her hair, sounding amused. "That one's on me. But it's fine. All Naomi ever does is work. She's not into stuff like this."

I glanced at Celia's latest handbag and freshly done nails, then lowered my eyes.

It wasn't that I didn't like those things. I just couldn't afford them.

When I first started working, Mom told me our neighbor's daughter had bought her mother a gold necklace after just one month on the job. So I bought Mom one too.

After that, there was always something else to pay for. Every month, either the furniture needed replacing or another household bill came up.

Mom said the family had a lot of expenses and asked me to hand over part of my paycheck every month. She said she'd save the rest for me, so I gave her the money.

Whenever my coworkers invited me out to eat, I politely turned them down because one meal out cost as much as a whole week's lunches.

Mom was always telling me, "Naomi, I'm only looking out for you. If you spend too much now, how are you going to get by later?"

But that day, I finally saw the truth. Mom only cared about keeping my spending down. Celia made even more than I did, yet Mom still worried that she might have to go without.

Celia opened the camera app on her phone and handed it to me. "Naomi, if you don't mind, could you take a family photo of us with the dolls?"

She called a picture of the four of them a family photo, and no one seemed to think anything of it.

I quietly took the phone. The moment I pressed the shutter, I made up my mind.

I was done carrying this family. From then on, I was only going to look out for myself.