Chapter 4

Elena's POV

After the engagement banquet, Vicky and Joey set the date for their wedding before long.

There was no way the gossip from those weeks hadn't reached their ears, but Vicky still went out of her way to choose me as her wedding planner.

She seemed to require my presence—her pitiful contrast—just to reassure herself that she would always be the one chosen, effortlessly and without question.

I had a betrothal in hand, but didn't even have a date set for an engagement banquet. Over time, I had become a joke to everyone — quietly, by default.

Because I'd grown up without my parents' attention, I'd always assumed I just wasn't good enough — that was why James didn't love me. So in front of Vicky, I had always shrunk.

I had taken her petty cruelties for years, following the family's instruction never to provoke a vampire.

But now — thinking of the way James had looked at me, the gifts he had sent — I suddenly didn't want to bow that low anymore.

When we were planning the wedding, I stopped going along with everything she wanted. I stopped apologizing first whenever something went wrong. It clearly didn't sit well with her.

"Your designs are mediocre." "I hate this bouquet." "This ugly dress — wear it yourself."

She kept changing her mind on purpose, often demanding revised proposals from me in the middle of the night.

The discarded drafts piled up in stacks on my desk, but I held my ground.

When James came by my studio, I didn't have time to put the papers away.

He glanced over them, and didn't seem to care much. He told me to go rest for a while — that sleep would do me good.

I took his advice. When I woke up, it was already dark outside.

A message had come in. Vicky said she'd found a better design for the wedding. From here on, she just needed me to oversee the on-site rehearsal.

A flicker of confusion went through me — I didn't know how she'd found a satisfying wedding planner so quickly. But my body was still tired, and I didn't think too hard about it.

Three days later, when I showed up at her wedding rehearsal, I understood.

The swing, lawn and fountain. An outdoor wedding.

The layout. The angle of the lights. The flowers. Everything matched the wedding in my private sketchbook, exactly.

Not a single detail off.

I stood in the entrance and didn't go in right away.

Someone was adjusting the lights. Someone was running a sound check. The director's voice repeated the cue, again and again.

"Groom, take a step forward."

I followed the voice with my eyes.

The man on the stage was James.

The stage lights cast a shadow along the elegant line of his nose. He looked like a model who had stepped out of an oil painting — pale, flawless, smiling and murmuring to Vicky beside him.

He was standing in the groom's place. He took the bouquet, walked the line I had designed, paused, adjusted his angle.

The motion was natural. As if the place had always been his to begin with.

I stood there. I didn't move.

People walked past me, talking in lowered voices, laughing softly.

"Joey went up north on business — flight got delayed, couldn't make it back for the rehearsal."

"Well, his little brother's certainly realizing the dream now."

The voices were quiet. Just clear enough that I could hear them.

I stood below the stage in the red dress James had given me.

Every part of it was a joke.

The dress was meant for Vicky in the first place.

This wedding — the wedding of my dreams that I had designed myself — he was going to hand to Vicky too.

Every bit of love, every ounce of attention, James had given to Vicky.

And I deserved to wear someone else's leftover clothes — to hand over even the things I cherished most, with both hands, to someone else.

I let out a small, bitter laugh. The tears slid down my face, but I just kept staring at James on the stage.

The look on him — happy, careful, almost reverent — drove a fresh blade into a heart that was already in pieces.

In one unguarded moment, James saw me there in the audience.

He froze for a beat. Then he looked away and tightened his grip on Vicky's hand.

"Elena's here too? Didn't Vicky say she didn't like her designs?"

"How embarrassing. The Valerie family has been pushing for the engagement banquet for ages. A pity James has time to play groom for his brother but no time to actually marry his own fiancée."

A few of Vicky's relatives were murmuring behind me.

Listening to those familiar, biting voices, I suddenly realized I couldn't stand any more of it.

By the time the rehearsal ended, the sky had gone fully dark.

The crowd thinned out. When James came down from the stage, he saw me.

He noticed how red my eyes were — how clearly I had been crying. Something pained flickered across his face, and he started toward me without thinking.

I had been planning to finally lay everything out with him. But just then, Vicky came over too.

"Sorry, Elena. Joey couldn't make it in time. I had to borrow James for a bit. You don't mind, right?"

She had James's arm. Her smile was sweet.

"Thank goodness for James — I don't know what I would have done with this wedding otherwise!"

"You'll all be one family soon enough anyway, so I'll just transfer James's fee to you, all right?"

Every sentence cut at the parts of me that were thinnest. She knew perfectly well that James still hadn't moved on our engagement, and she wanted to bring up the idea of us being family right there.

I couldn't even hold a smile anymore. I just looked at James.

He couldn't quite meet my eyes. He opened his mouth to explain. "Vicky, this design is actually Elena's — "

"It's fine. The rehearsal went well. If there's nothing else, I'll be going."

I cut him off and turned to leave.

The moment I turned my back, the tears came, and I couldn't stop them.

The servants and relatives all saw the look on my face. They smiled, mocking, watching the whole thing unfold like entertainment.

It wasn't the first time I'd been laughed at like this in a crowd.

I had known for so long that the one James loved was Vicky.

Whether with my parents or with James, I would never be the first choice.

Why hadn't I been able to let go back then?

The cold wind cut against my cheeks.

The lights along the busy street were flickering on for the night, and the vampires passing by were all eyeing me strangely.

It struck me, suddenly, that I had never really belonged to this world. And I had nowhere to go.