A Fact

Beta Alvin walked me right up to Alpha Dexter's door. He handed me a package with a thin cloth for a blindfold and a clean towel. "Remember my instructions," he said. "Do it right. Don't miss a single thing."

I nodded, my heart pounding like crazy.

I went into Alpha Dexter's room. He was lying on the massive bed now, covered by a thick blanket. His face was peaceful in a deep sleep, but that very calmness just made me even more anxious. An IV was stuck in his arm.

I put the package on the nightstand, then set down a basin of warm water and some small clean towels next to it.

I stood by the bed. "Alpha," I whispered, even though I knew he wouldn't hear me. "I'm sorry, Alpha." I knew he wouldn't wake up, but still, it just felt wrong doing this.

I took a deep breath. I had to clean his whole body. That meant I had to lift him.

I tried to grab his shoulder. He was heavy. With all my strength, I tried to lift his body a bit, so I could clean his back. My hands wrapped around his shoulder, gently pushing him. The movement made me lose my balance a little.

I needed to grab a towel. As I reached for it, Alpha Dexter's slightly lifted body suddenly crashed back onto the bed.

THUMP!

That heavy thud made me jump. My heart felt like it was going to burst out of my chest. I quickly grabbed Alpha Dexter's shoulder again, making sure he wouldn't fall off the bed.

I was stressed out. What the heck was I supposed to do? 

I'd already screwed up. My eyes scanned Alpha Dexter's face, but he was still fast asleep. His breathing was steady. I panicked, looking for another way.

It was only then that it hit me. Alpha Dexter was still wearing his clothes. I was so busy figuring out how to clean his body, I totally forgot he hadn't even taken his clothes off yet.

The two pieces of cloth Alvin gave me. I grabbed one of them, a thin, scarf-like cloth. I covered my eyes with it. Didn't care how stupid I looked. I just didn't want to see. This was my last resort to protect myself.

My hands fumbled, searching for Alpha Dexter's shirt buttons. I unbuttoned his shirt one by one. The fabric was soft, expensive. Once the shirt was open, I could feel the warmth of his skin.

I touched his chest, his stomach muscles. His body was perfect, toned, and muscular. I knew he was strong, but feeling it firsthand was a whole different experience.

"You have a great body, Alpha. So muscular," I thought. I pictured Madison or Luna Eva seeing this.

Would they sneer?

I was just a Ruby with no power, but here I was, cleaning this Alpha's body.

I grabbed a wet towel and slowly cleaned his chest, arms, and neck.

Then, it was time to take off his pants. My hands paused for a moment. I took a deep breath. This was getting even more awkward.

I fumbled for his belt buckle, undoing it slowly. Then I pulled his pants down. Only to his knees. I didn't need to see beyond that. I just needed to make sure his body was clean.

I cleaned his thighs, his knees, with quick, efficient movements. Focus. Don't think about anything but the task.

I hope this isn't a sin, I kept telling myself. This is a job. I have no choice. I'm just doing my duty.

I hope Alpha Dexter doesn't hate me when he wakes up. And I hope he never knows how nervous I was, and how I was low-key admiring his muscles while cleaning him.

I walked out of Alpha Dexter's room. My face was burning hot, and my heart was pounding like I'd just run a marathon.

I quickly took a deep breath, trying to calm myself down.

Beta Alvin was already waiting outside, leaning against the wall. He raised an eyebrow when he saw me. A small, almost imperceptible smile played on the corner of his lips.

"All done?" he asked.

I nodded, trying to hide my flushed cheeks.

"How was it?" He stepped closer. "Did you have any trouble?"

"Nope," I answered quickly.

"Good," Alvin said. "Come on. I asked the servants to prepare some tea. Looks like you need something warm to calm down."

We walked into a small room, separate from the main kitchen.

Warm, jasmine-scented tea wafted from the cup. I sipped it slowly. The warmth somewhat soothed my frazzled nerves.

"So," Alvin started again, that curious look still in his eyes. "How was it, cleaning Alpha Dexter?"

I set down my teacup, avoiding his gaze. "Nothing to tell," I said. "I just followed instructions."

Alvin chuckled slightly. "C'mon, Ruby. You can open up to me. Was he still scary even in his sleep?"

I shook my head. "No," I admitted. "He was peaceful." And handsome, I thought, with a perfectly muscled body. But I'd never say that out loud.

"You'll be doing this for the next nine days."

His words almost made my teacup slide right out of my hand. "Nine days?!" I exclaimed. "But... Eveline will be healed before that, right? Her injury wasn't that bad, Doctor Martin can definitely fix her up."

"That's true," Alvin nodded. "But Eveline's injury is pretty serious. The doctor said it'll take a few days before she can move comfortably. And look, Ruby. Not everyone gets to see Alpha Dexter in that condition."

"Why?" I asked.

"The Alpha is a being who values privacy greatly," Alvin explained, his voice dropping low. "Only Eveline, the old servant who's been loyal for a very long time, has ever seen the Alpha in such a vulnerable state. He doesn't want many people seeing him like that. Especially if you're new, and from a different Pack. He can only trust a handful of people. Eveline trusts you, so I have to trust you too."

"I refuse," I said.

Alvin raised an eyebrow. "Refuse? Is the Alpha's body not appealing?" His tone was slightly teasing.

"It's not like that!" My cheeks flushed again. "Of course, it's appealing. But, I'm just not used to this. It's very personal."

Alvin sighed. "Just get used to it, Ruby. There's no other choice. Eveline can't, and no one else is allowed." He looked at me seriously. "But listen, you have to maintain your boundaries. You can get used to this task, you can do it well, but never have any feelings for the Alpha."

His words surprised me. "Feelings?"

"Yeah. Feelings. Because the Alpha won't reciprocate." Alvin sipped his tea. "He lost his Luna a few years ago. A deadly, incurable disease. Since then, Alpha Dexter has never been interested in love. His heart is completely closed off."

I remembered our conversation when he asked me not to hide during training. When he allowed me to grow. He looked so strong and unshakeable. So, this was the reason?

"Is that why," I asked, my voice barely a whisper, "he hated my weak body so much?"

Alvin nodded, his gaze now filled with pity. "Ever since he lost his Luna, Alpha Dexter did develop an extreme view on strength. For him, weakness is the cause of loss. He believes that if someone is strong, they won't lose to disease, to enemies, to anything. He doesn't want his Pack or anyone around him to end up like his Luna."

A realization pierced me. This wasn't about me being weak. This was about him being afraid of loss. A strange sense of pity crept into my heart.